A More Accurate Depiction of The State of the Union – IOTW Report

A More Accurate Depiction of The State of the Union

Babylon Bee

The White House has announced President Joe Biden will be skipping out on this year’s State of the Union address, which will instead feature a 90-minute broadcast of a dumpster engulfed in flames. Both houses of congress are expected to assemble as usual as the raging dumpster fire roars into a microphone.

House Sergeant at Arms William J. Walker will light the dumpster at the commencement of the address. Members of Congress are then expected to applaud in a partisan manner as the cathartic flames burn brightly into the night. More


13 Comments on A More Accurate Depiction of The State of the Union

  1. Way to go Bee!! This actually makes more sense and has fewer lies than the pResident. Even better, no Drunk Nancy doing the wrist washing thing when Joey was taking about burn pits

    9
  2. Could it have been like when “Nero fiddled while Rome burned?”

    C’mon America…

    Anyone with a shed of American pride should feel dirty and abused as these assclowns go about there bidness.

    13
  3. I lasted about 3 minutes, just could not take looking at the 2 cunts sitting behind him. Especially Pelosi and her standing up and clapping at one piece of bullshit after another.

    9
  4. “Dumpster Fire” iz not a fair analogy for a Democrat pedophile poser giving a pretend SOTU address.

    Dumpster fires consume garbage, some down to odorless ash.
    Pedo Democrats make MORE and WORSE garbage, toxic as hell on purpose, and it smells even WORSE when they’re done.

    You can put out a dumpster fire without being imprisoned indefinitely without trial, and don’t get hunted mercilessly by the FBI and have your life ruined for just watching someone ELSE try to deal with a dumpster fire.

    No one goes to a dumpster fire to throw MORE fuel on it.

    Worst case dumpster fire is a very local event that produces hot, wet garbage.
    Worst case pedo dem SOTU spews hot, wet excrement over the entire nation.

    I fought quite a few dumpster fires. I never saw the media promote them or say we should have more.

    I never saw a room full of firefighters stand and applaud any noise a dumpster fire made.

    No dumpster fire ever required people to be fired for not getting vaxxinated against foul things the dumpster fire itself produced.

    Dumpster fires don’t try to cause WWIII to hide their own malfeasance and misfeasance.

    And I’ve never heard of a dumpster fire that repeatedly rapes and moslests children, sometimes on camera, with no one trying to stop it.

    Dumpster fires don’t have taxpayer funded apologists that defend their burning and try to place the blame on everyone else.

    And there’s no political party that steals elections so dumpster fires can ruin our lives.

    Given a choice, I’d rather have a dumpster fire than a pedophile pretendedent.

    A dumpster fire even left alone will burn itself out eventually, but the devil just keeps stoking the Democrat Party as it burns down this nation both figuratively and literally.

    And at the end of the day, that’s why its not a fair analogy.

    Dumpster fires can be accidents.
    Democrats destroy on PURPOSE.

    So please don’t insult dumpster fires.

    Democrats are an evil unto themselves.

    There is simply nothing else evil enough, disgusting enough, foul enough, or fetid enough to compare them to…

    6
  5. It was somewhat suspicious when one of the first actions of Biden after becoming president was to shut down the Keystone XL pipeline in March of 2021, along with some reference regarding Climate Change.

    Then, in May of 2021 Biden, along with some of his administration, waived the sanctions on the Russian pipeline, stating that they still oppose it, but would waive the sanctions in the interest of “rebuilding relationships with our allies and partners in Europe”. Additionally, Biden claimed he has “…been opposed to the Nord Stream 2 gas pipeline, but will waive sanctions against it because it’s almost completely finished” [New York Post, May 26, 2021]. No mention about it having any impact on “Climate Change”.

    These actions generally raise several questions:

    1) Would the attack on Ukraine have occurred if Biden actually did not win the election and waived opposition to the Russian pipeline? So, winning the 2020 election would be Priority Number One if he were to profit off some pending deal with Russia.

    2) So, when does “The Big Man” start receiving his 10 percent?

    7
  6. Something smells about this war – it is hard to tell who Biden is rooting for…
    If Ukraine remains intact, (& Russia loses), then the Biden mafia will still get their shakedown from the Ukraine energy company, Burisma. So Biden should do everything he can to see that Russia loses.
    Yet, the USA still sends billions of $ to buy Russian gas, thereby aiding and abetting the Russian side. If Russia overruns the Ukrainian capital and finds all the incriminating evidence against the Bidens, they then have an incriminating sword always hanging over the Biden mafia.
    Whatever it is, Biden is a seriously compromised leader to the world and to America’s future.

    4
  7. SNS – If not a dumpster fire, might he and his administration be better labeled an “port-a-potty fire?”

    4
  8. Anybody scratching their head about who Jackass Joe is rooting for needs to axe themselves only one question:
    What has he done to improve the Nation and American lives?

    The answer is: Not one Goddamned thing!

    It may not answer your question about who he’s rooting for, but it sure does point out who he’s working against!

    4
  9. It seemed that both Nancy and Chuckie were startled awake just a scoach early a couple times during the fire….

    2
  10. A boss and freind of mine who served in Afghanistan once showed me a picture of and told me about the current military practice of burning poop from latrines in forward bases. As I could not hope to do justice to the horrors he battered my virgin ears with on that subject with anything like the flavor he gave it, I found a somewhat less compelling, but still very vivid, description of this process at the link below

    “…This was surely as unpleasant a job as any in recent human history. But alas, it was mine and mine alone. And so I burned on, stirring, pouring diesel, igniting, repeat—until all the shit was burned away, the shit of 150 fighting men who for months ate a consistent diet of MREs, beef jerky, Pop-Tarts, Top Ramen and Rip-its. The foul mass would slowly burn away pound by pound, until nothing was left but a thick ashy clump that could be thrown away into a bigger burn pit.”
    http://www.lpcvetstories.com/category/veteran-stories/army/

    …that said, the flaming, boiling mass of human fecal matter mixed with fuel and reduced to ash for reburning was of better chatacter, higher value, and less putrid than the squalid demons known as Democrats smearing the offal of their lies all over what was once a high seat of government but now is nothing more than a vast, stinking repository of vile twisted ancient decrepit beings in a swamp, spewing their bitterness like bile upon the nation in betrayal of their oaths out of hatred and spite and nothing more.

    Given a choice between watching everyone who was or applauded that illegitimate, demented, senile puppet pedophile posing as president and stirring those tubs of flaming feces, I will stit the feces.

    At least it came from honorable people and serves a purpose.

    No one who stood and applauded that fake molester serves anything but the devil and wouldn’t know honor if it bit them.

    1

Comments are closed.