“Then proceeded to cast a ballot for the democrats…”
18
Why limit the dead to just one vote?
11
Gooden Morning to you
Have you been sleeping?
Have you heard the News
Fyre Fest II has been announced
Macfarland the crypto-grifting shysturd broke the News on CNN
In other shysturd Hollywood News
Baldwin announces
Rust Can’t Sleep
The Flick is back on
Rust Needs Oil
Start Lubin’ for a Summer of Hot, Hot, Hot Fun
Pre-Book and Pre-Pay for your tickets today
All Payment Processing System Network APPS Accepted
Sponsered By: Mamas Fish Oils
You could say that the weight of the organ donor’s dead body saved him,
But if it weren’t for the organ donor’s body, he wouldn’t have been out in the FIRST place and none of this would have ever happened.
Somehow I don’t think it was a conscious effort on the part of the organ donor one way or another.
But you never know…
9
I had a funeral home livery sharing the alley behind my old house, and you’d be surprised how often and at what hours they went out to schelp the dead around.
People die at all hours of the day and night, weekends and holidays included, and for some reason they never seem to die in a place that’s set up to handle it from A to Z, so they have to be trucked around somehow. Dead people are very inconsiderate that way. Being a bit pointless at that stage to transport in an ambulance who’s business is with the living (although under some cirumstances and depending on the laziness level of the politically elected coroner you might), and being very uncooperative about being placed in a sitting position to be driven around by a family member, and being kinda leaky and increasinly whiffy regardless of the mode of transportation, in a box in a hearse is the go-to arrangement for the taxi services of the formerly alive, to get to the mogure or the funeral home or – as in this case – transported to a facility that can scoop out the usable parts for redistibution in a way that leaves them usable for next guy, as not every hospital has that capability.
It’s not bad work if you can get it, and don’t mind operating oversized vehicles. The ride is plush, people tend to give deathwagons a wide berth for some reason, and your passenger is unlikely to complain either naturally or supernaturally, so kind of a walk in the park compared to crazy Uber passengers or any sort of taxi service. Of course the FRESHLY dead actually CAN twitch and move a bit and make noises if their organs are still intact (up to and including EXTREMELY foul farting and moaning as internal gases are released by decay and motion), so it may not be an ENTIRELY peaceful ride, but keep the windows down and the radio on and you’ll be fine.
I don’t know if it’s related to the tragic status of trucking the erstwhile humans around that is their stock in trade or not, but at least at the particular livery where I used to live they also ran a lively drug trade out of the building. This wasn’t a super-posh neighborhood and the demographics tended to be darker, and the funeral home itself catered almost exclusively to people who in life were inordinately proud of their skin color, so the police left them alone, and often didn’t patrol the alley at all, being far more interested in the bar on the corner up from it that had a mostly White clientele on most evenings due to it being a legacy biker bar that also brought in live bands on weekends (and wasn’t THAT fun for me at night!). They usually left the bar owners themselves alone due to the fact that it was Mob affiliated, but the clientele could be rambunctuous and didn’t have protective coloration, so the police were more than happy to relieve THEM of their weapons and stash while simply not venturing down the alley to the garage with the hurry-up wagons going in and out along with walk-ins that didn’t appear to be there for the ride.
I could tell you some other things about the home that owned the livery because a family friend was also an embalmer, but a lot of it is pretty disgusing in both his business practices and his racial attitudes and may or may not be representative of the funeral industry as a whole, so I’ll leave it at that. Our friend was herself Black but was so offended by the way the guy carried on (she had a White husband BTW) that she quit for that and other reasons (including the time she broke a rib after an impromptu dance with a 350 pound dead guy), but that’s a different story for another day…
5
Not only am I an organ donor, I’m ballast.
3
aircubed
AT 8:24 AM
“Not only am I an organ donor, I’m ballast.”
Dead Weight.
5
But seriously, the organ donor thing is a good thing to do. Dead folks do not need them any more and they can help a suprising number of people.
My FIL died unexpectedly of myocarditis way back before that was cool, so they were unable to use his heart or his liver like they normally would and his lungs were jacked from smoking, but they WERE able to use his corneas, his long bones, ligaments, veins, skin, a bunch of stuff, so we’re told that once parted out he helped 18 people basically immediately despite some of his major organs not being themselves especially useful.
I know some religions say you need to be buried with your organs intact, something about getting up at the Judgement Trump when Jesus calls you out of the grave, but I’m pretty sure that the guy who can ressurect you can also make up for any organ deficits if’n He feels its important to do so. Same for cremation, there’s a Biblical story about dry bones being reanimated in the Old Testament (Ezekiel 37) that suggests that the same God that crafted you from dust in the first place needs very little to work with to reconstitute you, if he deems you worthy of doing so, so I wouldn’t worry about that.
…then you don’t have to put it on your driver’s license or anything, but DO make your will known to your next of kin and that way it will be as much a surprise to the hospital as it is to your recipients when you pass this vale of tears without some of your squshy bits, and without an advance directive even an evil doctor (which seems to be the majority now) can’t consider if your parts are worth more than your hole ahead of time unless the wife gets talky with him.
So donor up like this guy did.
Parts of you will live on.
Because believe me, no one’s gonna want to see your meat sacks after a couple of day anyway, not even the Lord.
1
True story – Back in the late 70s a buddy an me went to the Gauley River to do some experienced rafting. He knew a old guy (prob in his 80s) up in the mountains that had paved a runway on his rolling farmland and flew a larger single engine plane so we decided to go up and see if he was available for some sight seeing. We knocked on the back door and his wife said he wasn’t here, but that she had just talked to him on the radio and that he was flying in from Washington DC and that he would be landing in about 15 minutes, so we stuck around and greeted him when he landed. We told him that we wanted to do some sight seeing, but that if he was too tired from his flight we could come back later. He said he would be glad to. We just had to gas up a little and he would be good to go. Then he told us there’s only one thing we need to know. He went to Washington to bring back a dead body. We asked him if he wanted any help taking it off the plane and he said “oh hell no, he won’t mind if you don’t mind!” We looked at each other said OK then and went sight seeing with a DB in back!
3
…one other thing about that “Organs Intact” burial thing…
…sometimes an autopsy is necessary, maybe even legally required, but what they do to make people who want all-in organ burial feelz better is tell them that they will take them out, weigh them, do some other tests, then put them back so they will be present at the burial.
And maybe they do.
But sometimes they don’t.
…pathologists can be quite busy sometimes, the backlog heavy and the testing take considerable time, and it’s not time an unembalmed body has before it needs to be embalmed or interred, usually 24 hours by statute. SO, an unethical doctor (an increasingly commmon variant in this day and age) so chooses, he may, might, could put somoene ELSE’S organs in Uncle Bob, because neither YOU nor Uncle Bob will know the difference; and that gives him all the time he needs with Uncle Bob’s organs to determine if Aunt Mary killed him with strichnyne or not, or whatever it is he’s looking for…
…so, unless you plan to get hansy with the deceased at the veiwing and do some independent DNA testing, the body you get back might be one guy or two, so I’m not sure how Jesus will view THAT standing next to the grave in that Great Getting-Up morning, but given His rep for mercy I honestly don’t think it will make a difference…
.,,and BTW, the embalmer will NOT thank you for doing an Organs In reboot if you choose embalming afterwards. It actually makes HER job HARDER. No one’s going to reconnect any of that, they just ligate the main veins and make the poor girl deal with the internal chunks on an individual basis (it’s all been mobilized and kinda flops around since they don’t sew it back to the mesentary tissue), ’cause your deteriorating vessels aren’t going to be too accomodating about being sewn to your deliquescent organs anyhow, and it’s not like they’re going to heal or anything so it’s pretty darn pointless…
…so just pay it forwards to the next guy. He may cure cancer.
Or cause it.
But give him a chance either way.
You had a gift of life, so why not pay it forwards?
The next Civil War may be won by YOUR heart in a currently moribund but soon to be revitalized George Washington 2.0.
You never know…
1
That hearse driver needs a new larynx from a donor. Vocal fry sucks.
“Then proceeded to cast a ballot for the democrats…”
Why limit the dead to just one vote?
Gooden Morning to you
Have you been sleeping?
Have you heard the News
Fyre Fest II has been announced
Macfarland the crypto-grifting shysturd broke the News on CNN
In other shysturd Hollywood News
Baldwin announces
Rust Can’t Sleep
The Flick is back on
Rust Needs Oil
Start Lubin’ for a Summer of Hot, Hot, Hot Fun
Pre-Book and Pre-Pay for your tickets today
All Payment Processing System Network APPS Accepted
Sponsered By: Mamas Fish Oils
You could say that the weight of the organ donor’s dead body saved him,
But if it weren’t for the organ donor’s body, he wouldn’t have been out in the FIRST place and none of this would have ever happened.
Somehow I don’t think it was a conscious effort on the part of the organ donor one way or another.
But you never know…
I had a funeral home livery sharing the alley behind my old house, and you’d be surprised how often and at what hours they went out to schelp the dead around.
People die at all hours of the day and night, weekends and holidays included, and for some reason they never seem to die in a place that’s set up to handle it from A to Z, so they have to be trucked around somehow. Dead people are very inconsiderate that way. Being a bit pointless at that stage to transport in an ambulance who’s business is with the living (although under some cirumstances and depending on the laziness level of the politically elected coroner you might), and being very uncooperative about being placed in a sitting position to be driven around by a family member, and being kinda leaky and increasinly whiffy regardless of the mode of transportation, in a box in a hearse is the go-to arrangement for the taxi services of the formerly alive, to get to the mogure or the funeral home or – as in this case – transported to a facility that can scoop out the usable parts for redistibution in a way that leaves them usable for next guy, as not every hospital has that capability.
It’s not bad work if you can get it, and don’t mind operating oversized vehicles. The ride is plush, people tend to give deathwagons a wide berth for some reason, and your passenger is unlikely to complain either naturally or supernaturally, so kind of a walk in the park compared to crazy Uber passengers or any sort of taxi service. Of course the FRESHLY dead actually CAN twitch and move a bit and make noises if their organs are still intact (up to and including EXTREMELY foul farting and moaning as internal gases are released by decay and motion), so it may not be an ENTIRELY peaceful ride, but keep the windows down and the radio on and you’ll be fine.
I don’t know if it’s related to the tragic status of trucking the erstwhile humans around that is their stock in trade or not, but at least at the particular livery where I used to live they also ran a lively drug trade out of the building. This wasn’t a super-posh neighborhood and the demographics tended to be darker, and the funeral home itself catered almost exclusively to people who in life were inordinately proud of their skin color, so the police left them alone, and often didn’t patrol the alley at all, being far more interested in the bar on the corner up from it that had a mostly White clientele on most evenings due to it being a legacy biker bar that also brought in live bands on weekends (and wasn’t THAT fun for me at night!). They usually left the bar owners themselves alone due to the fact that it was Mob affiliated, but the clientele could be rambunctuous and didn’t have protective coloration, so the police were more than happy to relieve THEM of their weapons and stash while simply not venturing down the alley to the garage with the hurry-up wagons going in and out along with walk-ins that didn’t appear to be there for the ride.
I could tell you some other things about the home that owned the livery because a family friend was also an embalmer, but a lot of it is pretty disgusing in both his business practices and his racial attitudes and may or may not be representative of the funeral industry as a whole, so I’ll leave it at that. Our friend was herself Black but was so offended by the way the guy carried on (she had a White husband BTW) that she quit for that and other reasons (including the time she broke a rib after an impromptu dance with a 350 pound dead guy), but that’s a different story for another day…
Not only am I an organ donor, I’m ballast.
aircubed
AT 8:24 AM
“Not only am I an organ donor, I’m ballast.”
Dead Weight.
But seriously, the organ donor thing is a good thing to do. Dead folks do not need them any more and they can help a suprising number of people.
My FIL died unexpectedly of myocarditis way back before that was cool, so they were unable to use his heart or his liver like they normally would and his lungs were jacked from smoking, but they WERE able to use his corneas, his long bones, ligaments, veins, skin, a bunch of stuff, so we’re told that once parted out he helped 18 people basically immediately despite some of his major organs not being themselves especially useful.
I know some religions say you need to be buried with your organs intact, something about getting up at the Judgement Trump when Jesus calls you out of the grave, but I’m pretty sure that the guy who can ressurect you can also make up for any organ deficits if’n He feels its important to do so. Same for cremation, there’s a Biblical story about dry bones being reanimated in the Old Testament (Ezekiel 37) that suggests that the same God that crafted you from dust in the first place needs very little to work with to reconstitute you, if he deems you worthy of doing so, so I wouldn’t worry about that.
If you’re concerned about THIS;
https://youtu.be/Sp-pU8TFsg0?t=1
…then you don’t have to put it on your driver’s license or anything, but DO make your will known to your next of kin and that way it will be as much a surprise to the hospital as it is to your recipients when you pass this vale of tears without some of your squshy bits, and without an advance directive even an evil doctor (which seems to be the majority now) can’t consider if your parts are worth more than your hole ahead of time unless the wife gets talky with him.
So donor up like this guy did.
Parts of you will live on.
Because believe me, no one’s gonna want to see your meat sacks after a couple of day anyway, not even the Lord.
True story – Back in the late 70s a buddy an me went to the Gauley River to do some experienced rafting. He knew a old guy (prob in his 80s) up in the mountains that had paved a runway on his rolling farmland and flew a larger single engine plane so we decided to go up and see if he was available for some sight seeing. We knocked on the back door and his wife said he wasn’t here, but that she had just talked to him on the radio and that he was flying in from Washington DC and that he would be landing in about 15 minutes, so we stuck around and greeted him when he landed. We told him that we wanted to do some sight seeing, but that if he was too tired from his flight we could come back later. He said he would be glad to. We just had to gas up a little and he would be good to go. Then he told us there’s only one thing we need to know. He went to Washington to bring back a dead body. We asked him if he wanted any help taking it off the plane and he said “oh hell no, he won’t mind if you don’t mind!” We looked at each other said OK then and went sight seeing with a DB in back!
…one other thing about that “Organs Intact” burial thing…
…sometimes an autopsy is necessary, maybe even legally required, but what they do to make people who want all-in organ burial feelz better is tell them that they will take them out, weigh them, do some other tests, then put them back so they will be present at the burial.
And maybe they do.
But sometimes they don’t.
…pathologists can be quite busy sometimes, the backlog heavy and the testing take considerable time, and it’s not time an unembalmed body has before it needs to be embalmed or interred, usually 24 hours by statute. SO, an unethical doctor (an increasingly commmon variant in this day and age) so chooses, he may, might, could put somoene ELSE’S organs in Uncle Bob, because neither YOU nor Uncle Bob will know the difference; and that gives him all the time he needs with Uncle Bob’s organs to determine if Aunt Mary killed him with strichnyne or not, or whatever it is he’s looking for…
…so, unless you plan to get hansy with the deceased at the veiwing and do some independent DNA testing, the body you get back might be one guy or two, so I’m not sure how Jesus will view THAT standing next to the grave in that Great Getting-Up morning, but given His rep for mercy I honestly don’t think it will make a difference…
.,,and BTW, the embalmer will NOT thank you for doing an Organs In reboot if you choose embalming afterwards. It actually makes HER job HARDER. No one’s going to reconnect any of that, they just ligate the main veins and make the poor girl deal with the internal chunks on an individual basis (it’s all been mobilized and kinda flops around since they don’t sew it back to the mesentary tissue), ’cause your deteriorating vessels aren’t going to be too accomodating about being sewn to your deliquescent organs anyhow, and it’s not like they’re going to heal or anything so it’s pretty darn pointless…
…so just pay it forwards to the next guy. He may cure cancer.
Or cause it.
But give him a chance either way.
You had a gift of life, so why not pay it forwards?
The next Civil War may be won by YOUR heart in a currently moribund but soon to be revitalized George Washington 2.0.
You never know…
That hearse driver needs a new larynx from a donor. Vocal fry sucks.