One of my spammer caller techniques isn’t very funny but is still highly satisfying. Listen to the caller’s spiel just long enough to learn what he’s selling, then say, “Oh, that’s just what I’ve been looking for! Hold on while I go get my credit card.”
Then just put the phone down, leaving the line open while you quietly go back to what you were doing before being so rudely interrupted.
12
Uncle Al,
I heard another good one when you get a call from a number you don’t know, especially from a different state:
“Hello, this is the FBI Fraud Division. How may I direct your call?”
9
I finally got rid of one persistent spammer by pretending to be a DJ for “Radio Station WXYZ, on the air with flair. Is there anything you want to say to our on-air audience?” (CLICK)
Now-a-days I either tell ’em to “f**k off”, or just scream into the phone (hopefully it gives them a headache).
7
Public service tip: I used to have fun with scam callers, but now I don’t answer unknown numbers. The reason is two-fold: (1) just by answering the telephone, you are acknowledging that this is an active number and many scammers make some money by selling active numbers. (2) With the rise of AI technology, scammers can clone your voice and try to use your voice to scam others. This is becoming popular with the “your son/daughter/close relative” is in jail or the hospital, and we need money now.
It’s really too bad that increased technology is ruining the fun of wasting scammer’s time. On some occasions, when scammers would claim that the police are on their way because my social security number was found in a car impounded on drug charges, I used to request a SWAT team because I had never had one before; I’ve also asked for my drugs back. When driving, I used to put them on mute while I “searched for my credit card” – my current record is 45 minutes until they hung up. When pretending to purchase gift cards, I would suggest all sorts of obscure gift cards instead of the normal Target, Walmart or CVS cards. When fraudulent bank employees would try to verify purchases, I would agree that I did in fact make these purchases although sometimes this was physically impossible. My favorite was one fraudulent charge scammer who finally asked if I had recently purchased plane tickets to Dubai. (Of course I said I did).
However, dedicated scammers can use any information you give to do further research if they want. The current advice is to try avoid answering these calls in the first place.
12
used to get debt-collector calls, told them to try the ghettopotamus/ebonics directory
4
Wyatt: I have read that you should not say “yes” on such calls. If they ask if you can hear them, you should say something such as “I can hear you fine.” If you say “yes,” they use it to fraudulently show that you agreed to their scam.
9
If it’s a junk call or a phone number that I don’t recognize I don’t answer the phone. I also look up area codes on Duckduckgo to see where the call originated from. My dad who was deaf as a post without his hearing aids liked to annoy callers by telling them to speak up or he couldn’t hear them especially when he got junk calls while at work, they finally gave up. Or he would turn up the volume on his hearing aids to a very high-pitched squeal to annoy the hell out of them until they hung up.
6
Nearly all my spam calls are from robot dialers for medicare advantage plans. There is no stopping them. Today at 6:30 AM the phone started ringing. A lot of times, microsoft calls about the virus on my computer. I’ll walk then thru Chrome, Firefox, Edge and finally Brave browsers. After playing a dumb idiot with 404 Errors, (India idiots can’t figure out they are being played) they finally ask how I access the internet. I tell them “they don’t let me have internet”
13
-Hello
-Is this Mr Hasty
-I’m not wearing any panties
click
8
I told one Indian fellow that was pedaling pharmaceuticals on then phone that he had reached me on a clandestine cell phone inside a medium security prison. I asked if he could send opioids or viagra. He asked what I wanted with viagra if I were in prison. I told him that after five or six years the guards were looking pretty good. He hung up.
8
One of the best things I ever did was move to the 513 area code, then block all calls from 248 that aren’t in my contacts list. 99% of spam stopped!
3
Too many of the “calls” I receive are 1)robo calls 2)Medicare plans 3)police shopping for children. I either ignore them (they hang up without answering), or tell them “NO!”
2
I felt bad for the sales guy!
2
“Hello”
(Thick Bengali Accent) “Hello… This is MSN support. My name is Boaaaahb. We’ve found a security problem with your MSN account and need your user name and password to fix it.”
“Sure, my user name is ‘IndiaSucksAss’ and my password is ‘PajeetsRScumbags'”
2
Classic.
2
Calls from India – remember to call them this – “Ben Chode”
Look it up – it’s the worst thing you can call an Indian.
1
stopped calling, guess they got tired of being told to sk dindu dk
@RadioMattM: you can say “yes” if you want because there is no contract for fraud, but it is still a bad idea. As AI becomes more prevalent, scammers are using it for more sophisticated scams; many systems now change the accent to make the scammer sound more western.
I work with people several times a year on scams; unfortunately, there is nothing you can do once the money is gone. The scams I hate the most are romance scams; the victim is usually lonely and very vulnerable, they frequently lose most of their savings, and it’s almost impossible to convince them they are being scammed.
Scammers are also getting more dangerous. Yes, there are still gift card grifters and many payments are now by bit coin, but scammers are starting to use human mules to pick up cash payments.
1
@mr_pinko:
Calls from India – remember to call them this – “Ben Chode”
Look it up – it’s the worst thing you can call an Indian.
Thanks! I hadn’t run across that one before.
Everybody: I looked it up so you don’t have to: “sister-f***er”
2
think we should start calling them what they are….. stalkers. i make sure they hear it too.
1
I answer EVERY unknown number “You’re on the air!”. Most end there.
One of my spammer caller techniques isn’t very funny but is still highly satisfying. Listen to the caller’s spiel just long enough to learn what he’s selling, then say, “Oh, that’s just what I’ve been looking for! Hold on while I go get my credit card.”
Then just put the phone down, leaving the line open while you quietly go back to what you were doing before being so rudely interrupted.
Uncle Al,
I heard another good one when you get a call from a number you don’t know, especially from a different state:
“Hello, this is the FBI Fraud Division. How may I direct your call?”
I finally got rid of one persistent spammer by pretending to be a DJ for “Radio Station WXYZ, on the air with flair. Is there anything you want to say to our on-air audience?” (CLICK)
Now-a-days I either tell ’em to “f**k off”, or just scream into the phone (hopefully it gives them a headache).
Public service tip: I used to have fun with scam callers, but now I don’t answer unknown numbers. The reason is two-fold: (1) just by answering the telephone, you are acknowledging that this is an active number and many scammers make some money by selling active numbers. (2) With the rise of AI technology, scammers can clone your voice and try to use your voice to scam others. This is becoming popular with the “your son/daughter/close relative” is in jail or the hospital, and we need money now.
It’s really too bad that increased technology is ruining the fun of wasting scammer’s time. On some occasions, when scammers would claim that the police are on their way because my social security number was found in a car impounded on drug charges, I used to request a SWAT team because I had never had one before; I’ve also asked for my drugs back. When driving, I used to put them on mute while I “searched for my credit card” – my current record is 45 minutes until they hung up. When pretending to purchase gift cards, I would suggest all sorts of obscure gift cards instead of the normal Target, Walmart or CVS cards. When fraudulent bank employees would try to verify purchases, I would agree that I did in fact make these purchases although sometimes this was physically impossible. My favorite was one fraudulent charge scammer who finally asked if I had recently purchased plane tickets to Dubai. (Of course I said I did).
However, dedicated scammers can use any information you give to do further research if they want. The current advice is to try avoid answering these calls in the first place.
used to get debt-collector calls, told them to try the ghettopotamus/ebonics directory
Wyatt: I have read that you should not say “yes” on such calls. If they ask if you can hear them, you should say something such as “I can hear you fine.” If you say “yes,” they use it to fraudulently show that you agreed to their scam.
If it’s a junk call or a phone number that I don’t recognize I don’t answer the phone. I also look up area codes on Duckduckgo to see where the call originated from. My dad who was deaf as a post without his hearing aids liked to annoy callers by telling them to speak up or he couldn’t hear them especially when he got junk calls while at work, they finally gave up. Or he would turn up the volume on his hearing aids to a very high-pitched squeal to annoy the hell out of them until they hung up.
Nearly all my spam calls are from robot dialers for medicare advantage plans. There is no stopping them. Today at 6:30 AM the phone started ringing. A lot of times, microsoft calls about the virus on my computer. I’ll walk then thru Chrome, Firefox, Edge and finally Brave browsers. After playing a dumb idiot with 404 Errors, (India idiots can’t figure out they are being played) they finally ask how I access the internet. I tell them “they don’t let me have internet”
-Hello
-Is this Mr Hasty
-I’m not wearing any panties
click
I told one Indian fellow that was pedaling pharmaceuticals on then phone that he had reached me on a clandestine cell phone inside a medium security prison. I asked if he could send opioids or viagra. He asked what I wanted with viagra if I were in prison. I told him that after five or six years the guards were looking pretty good. He hung up.
One of the best things I ever did was move to the 513 area code, then block all calls from 248 that aren’t in my contacts list. 99% of spam stopped!
Too many of the “calls” I receive are 1)robo calls 2)Medicare plans 3)police shopping for children. I either ignore them (they hang up without answering), or tell them “NO!”
I felt bad for the sales guy!
“Hello”
(Thick Bengali Accent) “Hello… This is MSN support. My name is Boaaaahb. We’ve found a security problem with your MSN account and need your user name and password to fix it.”
“Sure, my user name is ‘IndiaSucksAss’ and my password is ‘PajeetsRScumbags'”
Classic.
Calls from India – remember to call them this – “Ben Chode”
Look it up – it’s the worst thing you can call an Indian.
stopped calling, guess they got tired of being told to sk dindu dk
@RadioMattM: you can say “yes” if you want because there is no contract for fraud, but it is still a bad idea. As AI becomes more prevalent, scammers are using it for more sophisticated scams; many systems now change the accent to make the scammer sound more western.
I work with people several times a year on scams; unfortunately, there is nothing you can do once the money is gone. The scams I hate the most are romance scams; the victim is usually lonely and very vulnerable, they frequently lose most of their savings, and it’s almost impossible to convince them they are being scammed.
Scammers are also getting more dangerous. Yes, there are still gift card grifters and many payments are now by bit coin, but scammers are starting to use human mules to pick up cash payments.
@mr_pinko:
Thanks! I hadn’t run across that one before.
Everybody: I looked it up so you don’t have to: “sister-f***er”
think we should start calling them what they are….. stalkers. i make sure they hear it too.
I answer EVERY unknown number “You’re on the air!”. Most end there.