New Earrings For Progressive Men

These will come in handy on election night, 2020.

21 Comments on New Earrings For Progressive Men

  1. But wipe.
    But CNN told me we would win!
    But MSNBC said we had it in the bag!
    But NPR promised Trump would lose!
    But, but, but…

  2. “Progressive Men” is an oxymoron, like “Honest Democrat”, “Patriotic Liberal” or “Lady Michelle Obama”. SOME things are just too contradictory to actually exist in nature, and that’s one of them…

  3. These newfangled ear bobs are something else.
    Not pictured: Tampon earrings because nowdays a man never knows when he’ll get his period.

  4. …but soon to be banned for cultural insensitivity, because Muslims and such don’t know what that is…

  5. …also, are you SURE you want to market them to “Progressive MEN”? Remember, they may only identify as men SOME of the time, and if you catch them when their having their period they may just walk past your product as sexist…

  6. …since “Progressive Men” are part of the reason “Progressive Women” act as they do (e.g. can’t get laid), perhaps a dildo in one ear and a vibrator in the other would help them make up for, eh, “shortcomings”.

    …and, of course, they could usr them on each OTHER too, during Pete Buttgeig campaign stops..


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