Thanksgiving Tips – IOTW Report

Thanksgiving Tips

November 22, 2016 MJA Uncategorized 40

turkey-scale


40 Comments on Thanksgiving Tips

  2. Try some chocolate drink mix in your egg nog.
    If you have no horseradish for the Prime Rib, Grey Poupon or similar mustard is a passable substitute.

  3. @Chip Kale – even better: wasabi. Most of the wasabi you get in the US is green-dyed horseradish anyway (except at the better sushi restaurants – they use the real stuff).

  5. Cover the turkey breast and drumsticks with bacon while baking. It helps keep the bird from getting dry and it adds to the flavor of the gravy.
    I like nibbling on the bacon while I am carving the bird prior to serving….

  11. @Brad – ram your mopar tailpipe right up the middle and keep the revs at about 4000 for about four hours. It will cook from the inside out.

  12. Jethro, I never though of that. I’m have are hard time finding one of those meat thermometers that pop out that’s 6 feet long.

  13. Brad – maybe you can use this old recipe for reference:

    Elephant Stew

    Ingredients
    1 Elephant
    10 Warthog
    100 kilogram tomatoes
    half ton potatoes
    100 kilogram salt
    1 wheelbarrow onions (heaped)
    10 liter vinegar
    20 liter chutney
    4 Guineafowl (optional)

    Method
    Hunt the elephant, warthog and guineafowl. Hang guineafowl to ripen. Cut elephant into edible chunks, (will take about a month). Boil the warthog with other ingredients (except guineafowl) till nice and juicy. Now boil elephant chunks over high flames till tender. (will take about 4 weeks) and add everything together. Boil for another 5 to 7 days.

    Produces about 3,500 helpings.

    Note: If the above isn’t enough, add the guineafowl as well.

  14. I got it!
    Take a car engine 180 degree thermostat, attach a long section of heater hose to it and jam it up the mooses ass until it reaches the middle of your concoction. When it’s done the thermostat will open and the juices will flow out!

  19. Turkey nuts;
    The best tip I can share is:

    Make sure the Turkey is dead before you place them in your mouth, they’ll scratch the hell out of you if you don’t.

  22. @Comrade Docski – I’ve read that C-4 burns very nicely and is handy that way, and to get it to go *CRACK!* takes quite an energetic detonator. Sounds as though you can verify from personal experience?

  23. I was watching a cooking show that showed the guy rip the spine out of the turkey and then pushed it flat til you heard a cracking noise. I wonder if that cooks faster and more evenly. Anyone know? Because that looked like horrific fun.

  24. Think I’m going with the tannerite this year. Maybe I’ll add a little kerosene. MJA, I’ll blow those spines out. Who’s coming for dinner?

  27. Zonga, I use to have an old cowboy uncle that said “When it’s smoking it’s cooking, when it’s black it’s done”. I loved that guy.

  29. Same here, Terry. Each year that passes I like Turkey less and less. I just can’t eat it anymore. Something about the smell and taste is off-putting, no matter what brand it is and who makes it.

  37. Eugenia, Seriuosly the family favorite Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner food. Duck breast wrapped around either a water chesnut or jalepeno with bacon wrapped around that and grilled with a spicy sauce. Not this year, too busy to hunt.

  39. My recommendation: Find every Hillary-supporting leftard within your family and rub the Trump win into their faces during the entire day – and especially at the dinner table.

    You’ll thank yourself later when they want to borrow money from you.

  40. In our family we do the traditional turkey dinner on Thanksgiving, but the main reason for the bird is that what we all really like better is turkey curry made from leftovers, and turkey gravy over everything for a few days. Yum!

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