Will whoever is pooping in the washing machines please cut that crap out?


[Carbondale, Illinois]


Serial pooper strikes Abbott Hall laundry room.

A bowel movement bandit has been prowling the lower level laundry room in Abbott Hall, leaving several residents to find fecal matter on clothes they left in washing machines.

“We heard about the pooper two weeks ago, two or three weeks ago,” Khiyah Ransom, a sophomore living in Abbott Hall studying industrial designsaid.

Ransom said she found out about the fecal fiend through a group chat that mentioned a student living on the second floor found excrement on her clothing in the washing machine.

more here

22 Comments on Will whoever is pooping in the washing machines please cut that crap out?

  1. Young military in the barracks learn quick to watch your shit in the laundry rooms.

    I guess these “smarter” morons don’t get it.

  2. anyone remember the ‘National Lampoon 1964 High School Yearbook’? … they had a subplot throughout it where a ‘Mad Crapper’ was wandering the school hallways late at night … by the end it was quite obvious who the culprit was … hilarious

  3. Yes mental illness is on the rise
    world wide. I really really don’t
    need to see or hear about any more scat stuff please.

  4. That was Me – I’m posting and one of 3 things happens.
    1. it post’s with no name
    2. it doesn’t post at all ( 75% )
    3. It has my name
    Sorry !

  5. Maybe they haven’t heard, there is this amazing new invention called a security camera; they might want to look into it?

  6. Out of curiosity I went and measured the opening in our washer and dryer. 20 inches. Strange size. So I’ll take an educated guess that the openings in the commercial washers and driers are 24 inches. The most attractive womans hips are 34 inches minimum. Guys, maybe 28 inches minimum. One would actually need to get their hips inside the cage to accurately deposit the waste matter. I’ve read several reports that claim the scat is green. People, we’re looking for Gumby.

  7. The easy way to ensure the culprit is appropriately punished when he’s caught is to slam the lid repeatedly on his junk so it all comes out in the wash. Guaranteed to take the starch right out of him.

    badump ching

  8. Winos shit green.
    Also people with severe infections.

    (retired plumber – not one of those … )

    izlamo delenda est …

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