FOX/ Most holiday shoppers take pride in finding thoughtful gifts for their loved ones, often spending hours doing research online before heading out to purchase the perfect presents.
Then there’s the type who only remembers to buy a gift the night before, and barely puts in any effort at all.
The latter approach works out every once in a while, but more often than not, it results in someone getting a lame, less-than-desirable gift — and stories of these thoughless presents are plentiful. We scoured a few different forums on Reddit to find the worst of the worst:
Gift card confusion
“This was actually really funny. It was from my Grandmother. I unwrapped it, and it was a little tin box. I opened the box and there was a fake gift card there, like [a placeholder for] where you put the gift card. And I just looked at her like … what is it or whats going on? And she goes “It’s a gift card holder. You can put all your gift cards in there.” And I just started laughing saying noooo, you are supposed to put a gift card in here to give to someone!
“It was really cute though. Bless her heart.”
– Reddit user ShekhMaShierakiAnni
A clear mistake
“My mom bought me one of those 3-D posters that were all the rage on the 90s. I am blind in one eye.”
– Reddit user Starringbecca
Getting the cart before the horse
“One year when I was a kid, my parents bought me a computer mouse. What makes it bad is that I didn’t have a computer, and had been asking for one for years.”
– Reddit user GildedFire
An (almost) re-gift
“This year I got a pair of pajamas that were identical to the pair I was wearing when I unwrapped them. Thanks again mom!”
– Reddit user whiteboyday
SNIP: One way to stop bad Christmas gifts is by not giving Christmas gifts at all.
I got a rubber chicken for the office party gift swap game.
😉
I often buy my wife a piece of kind of ugly jewelry.
She gets to return it and use the cash for something she really wants.
I get credit for trying, instead of just buying a gift card.
Only a mother’s love could appreciate truly awful gifts. My younger sister painstakingly wrapped a burnt out light bulb for mom.
Sis beamed with pride as Mom said (thru tears of laughter) how much she loved it.
One Christmas when I was 15, my mom bought me this ridiculously flimsy flying astronaut toy that just went around in a circle. I did not know what to say. I played with it in the basement so my sister would not make fun of me. Then it mysteriously broke.
A few years ago I got this crappy healthcare legislation…
When I was 7 or 8, I gave my mother a Frosty the Snowman comic book.
No one remembers any other gifts from that year.
Busy parents shouldn’t be blamed for not finding the just right gifts for their spouse. Soccer season finals last through December and sometimes into January if there are ties. So, one year I picked up everything I wanted for Christmas and let Geoff C. wrap it all up. On Christmas morning I ooooooh’d and awwww’d and profusely thanked him for being so thoughtful and clever. Only he and I knew.
Getting the missus a bucket, scrub brush and, because I am a loving husband….knee pads.
This might be my last communication.
I remember getting pictures of the Obama’s in the White House for Christmas. And for 8 consecutive years! bleh!
Our dishwasher shit the bed yesterday. I had a light work day, bought a new one and cussed for a couple of hours installing the new one. My daughters got home from school and were impressed enough to put a Christmas bow on it. I hope the wife is as enthused!
Any gift I give this year will be of less quality than last year, even if I pay more for it. Might as well light my money on fire and throw it out the window.
I lost my Dad several years ago, and remembering the Christmas gifts he gave me and the loving way he gave them still makes me teary.
He had a knack for giving the perfect gift. It was obvious he had put a lot of thought into it. I never could get through Christmas without crying because of his sweetness. He was great.
Oh, the worse present!!….
Switches in my stocking. I was three and my mother was fed up with me.
It really hurt my feelings, but I never told her.
You’re a lucky person oolook. It’s great to have such memories.
I was referencing your first post. Obviously.
Once at a company Christmas party on December 12th, I got one of those coupon books for free stuff in the community and half-off and BOGO coupons. You know the ones I mean. But it had expired on November 30! I hope the person who did that dies a painful death. MERRY CHRISTMAS to everyone else on the planet but them!
Not the worst Present..but the worst feeling..Just started
dating a girl…maybe a Month into it and She invites Me over
to Her Parents House for Christmas Dinner….
everyone in the Family had a gift for Me….Even the 5 year old
I of course had nothing for them…I felt like such an asshole
( a role I’ve grown into comfortably)
No cat turds wrapped in Almond Roca foil?
Man, you people are dull.
My husband one year kept kidding the two older kids who were teens that they weren’t getting anything for Christmas, that he was unwrapping all their presents and taking them back and getting his money.
Christmas eve night he got up and hid all their presents. He then went outside and scooped up dog crap and put it in two huge boxes, wrapped up the boxes and set them in front of the tree.
Even I didn’t know what he did and was just a little worried he had burned the presents. lol When they opened the boxes, which he made them open at the same time and told them, “you both have acted like little shits for two weeks, so all you deserve is shit.” The youngest son who was elementary age thought it was the funniest thing ever.
After we all got a good laugh, I asked where the presents were and he let them have them, but told them that next year shit is all there would be if they acted like little shits again.
I was at the mall last weekend, next to Santa with a line of kids so I felt like stirring the kettle.
I say, kinda loud “Hey Santa. I want a shiny new Camaro for Christmas.”
Santa says “It’s on my list. What’s you name?”
I said “It’s Joe. And you told me the same thing last year. And the year before. It’s on the list, but it never shows up. I’m starting to wonder about you.”
Santa, kind of perturbed, retorted “If you were ever a good boy maybe you’d get what you want.”
Me, “Touché, Santa. You got me there.”
And all the kids and their Moms got a good laugh.
Christmas is a holiday constructed around what women love to do,i.e. shopping and spending money. When do guys get THEIR holiday?
I went to a country school, grades 5 to 8. It was probably in 7th grade I got a pocket watch. I was thrilled. I wanted one, because many of the guys at school had one. It no longer works, but I still have it.
This isn’t really a bad present, it was actually a pretty good one…but delivered in a bad-ish way.
My uncle Bob (passed away many years ago) was an avid golfer and he asked “Santa” for Titleist golf balls. My two cousins (his daughters) another passle of cousins and in-laws, and I bought two dozen for him, a major outlay given out resources at the time.
We wrapped each one separately and in different ways so the packages didn’t all look the same: big boxes, little boxes, long boxes, tall boxes. He figured it out fairly quickly, though, and we laughed about it at several Christmas celebrations afterward.
Uncle Bob, married to my mother’s sister, always had a grin and a chuckle, and I miss him.
Oops. Need edit button. “…given our resources…”
Hanover, my ten year old son actually asked me to get him a rubber chicken! I’m trying to find a good one somewhere. He wants one that squawks.
My stepdad gave my brother in law 2 AA batteries with a note that said ‘Gift not included’.
I can’t really recall getting a bad present. We weren’t very well off when I was a kid so anything was appreciated.
Now that I ain’t a kid any more, I welcome socks and underwear. When my kids, now grown, ask me what I want for Christmas or birthday, I tell them that I have a dumpster for each of them (5) so be careful what you get me.
This is a funny Christmas present. She says “if all you can manage are these cheap Kmart earrings you can follow them out the door — OH!
Merry Christmas Bitch
https://youtu.be/nFEfqA4mD1Y
I got as a gag one year a Chia Obamahead! I had a yard sale and it was the first thing I sold! Go figure.
I’m old enough to remember when a new iron, vacuum cleaner, or sewing machine was considered to be a wonderful Christmas present for one’s wife. Even a toaster, if she didn’t already have one.
Vietvet….maybe around 1962, my Mom got a GE p7 stove/oven….it was self cleaning.Happy Happy woman!…..I’m sure my Dad had to rebuild a wrecked car to afford that…
@ Tony R – Oktoberfest
Year before last, the in-laws, I’m told, got me a $10 gift card to Harbor Freight. I’m also told they lost it before getting home. So instead, I got neatly wrapped, neatly folded leftover wrapping paper.
I got a coat from my father in 4x size.
I usually take a large, but this thing was humongous! I took a picture of me an my friend both wearing it. I guess I didn’t realize anyone could buy a 4x coat off the rack w/o going to a fat and tall shop.
No problem. Took it back and got a human-sized coat. It was the talk of the night though. I used it as a blanket!
5 stars Zonga
0bamacare. Ever since then I’ve had to go to doctors with cash and try to make ‘deals’ for my treatment and supplies for type 1 diabetes. Even worse, my insulin went from $75 to over $370 per month in a few years. Thanks 0bama. Hope you slip on rock in Hawaii and slip under the fucking waves, asshole.
Merry Christmas!
MJA, I’d just narrow it down to obama! That commie POS isn’t even worth upper case letters anywhere in his name! It’s my Christmas wish that Hillary finds out he sold her out…you know how that will end!
@Sturge: This is not a Christmas gift story, but your comment reminded me of something that happened earlier this year. We went on a cruise with my stepson, his wife, and their offspring, and at dinner one night a ship’s photographer took a picture of me mugging with one of the pirate characters employed by the cruise line. I had a hunch it was going to be a good picture, so after they posted the ones for that night, I looked for it. No luck. I went back several times, but never found it. Oh well.
Fast forward to Thanksgiving, when my stepson’s wife told me that they had seen the picture, thought it was terrific, and decided to buy it and present it to me at Thanksgiving dinner. Unfortunately, they dropped it in a mud puddle getting out of the car and it was ruined.
Thanks a lot, guys.
Vietvet, I’ve always liked gifts I can use. Our first anniversary my husband kept hinting around about what I wanted. I told him I wanted and needed a vacuum, an old wore out one someone had given me had bit the dust. I was taking a broom and sweeping the carpet. If you’ve never tried that it doesn’t work well and takes a lot of work.
He told me he was always taught you never give your wife anything to work with unless you want a divorce. I told him if he didn’t get me one then he could start figuring out how to clean the carpet.
So he bought me a new Eureka and then I couldn’t help myself I told him I couldn’t believe he gave me a vacuum for our first anniversary. Before he got too bent out of shape I told him he did good.
That was the best thing he ever got me that thing lasted 20 years, now one will hardly last as long as the warranty.
We got married in a fever, hotter than a pepper sprout, not really, but it’s a good song.
Bought a wedding ring in a pawn shop, $60.
Just over a divorce, money was tight, I got the shaft.
Actually got married because I was broke and we would get back $5k if we got married.
Years later, forget what the gift was going to be for, anniversary, birthday, Christmas, we aren’t big into gifts or holidays.
Anyway, I was going to get her a new wedding band, a nice one this time, wife said she would rather have a new washing machine.
My wife never complains, the best kind.
Got a timeshare once, to a place we had never been or wanted to go to.
You had to pay yearly to keep your space, gee thanks.
Vietvet December 18, 2017 at 10:07 pm
@Sturge: This is not a Christmas gift story, but your comment reminded me of something that happened earlier this year. We went on a cruise with my stepson, his wife, and their offspring, and at dinner one night a ship’s photographer took a picture of me mugging with one of the pirate characters employed by the cruise line. I had a hunch it was going to be a good picture, so after they posted the ones for that night, I looked for it. No luck. I went back several times, but never found it. Oh well.
Fast forward to Thanksgiving, when my stepson’s wife told me that they had seen the picture, thought it was terrific, and decided to buy it and present it to me at Thanksgiving dinner. Unfortunately, they dropped it in a mud puddle getting out of the car and it was ruined.
Thanks a lot, guys.
——————————————
So Viet Vet, go on another cruise and take more pictures! Going to Hawaii next month, DH’s birthday and our 49th wedding anniversary. It will be our 40th cruise, best gift to give one another. 🙂
One year i had been really bad. All I got was a can of cola in my stocking.
That fucking Santa, he’s dyslexic.
@Goldenfoxx: I’ll say the same thing to you that I say to my wife:
“DANG, woman – Do I look like I’m MADE out of cruises?”
😉
@Goldenfoxx: P.S. – Congratulations on a long and (presumably) happy marriage!
🙂