Story HERE
Well, I think it’s our duty to draw some of the fire away from the person receiving the death threats by creating some limericks of our own.
There once was a gentle giant
who wasn’t so officer compliant
He reached for the gun
but Ferguson’s first son
is now Hell’s most recent client
lol. Aw maaaan. See this is why I shouldn’t stop by before I go to sleep.
There once was a man who liked drama
he soon lost track of his baby mama
She gave birth to mike brown
who caused riots in town
then his family beat down his grandmama
Damn, MJA. You’re more creative just before you go to sleep than I am with a load of espresso in the AM. Nice work! 🙂
Once in the town called Ferguson
lived a young thug folks thought of as burdensome
he robbed near and far
beat a man for cigars
and I don’t have a rhyme for burdensome.
Good night!
Furgeson became a town of shame
and Brown was the one to blame
But then came Holter
that evil Jolter
Now racism is now fair game.
There once was a town in Missouri
That got all lit up in a big racist fury
Their favorite criminal son
Was no match for a gun
Now he’s raped, burned, murdered, and tortured by the devil.
Correction:
Furgeson became a town of shame
and Brown was the one to blame
But then came Holder,
that racist soldier,
Racism is now fair game.
There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose dick was so long he could suck it.
He said, with a grin as he wiped off his chin,
Michael Brown is dead, get over it.
There once was a man from Mizzou
Who confused his weight with his IQ
Tried to get the drop on a cop
But the cop made him stop
Helluva price for a clue.
That is just amazing how you guys do that. Man just great. Really great
There was a young man from Ferguson,
Who was built much like Sonny Jurgenson,
Stole a box of cigars,
Made a policeman see stars,
And now he could be Obama’s son.
There once was a thug
Who just needed a hug
Unobliging was Officer Wilson,
So the thug who was on drugs
Made a nasty mean mug
Attacked the cop so news could rate with Nielsen.
A drug-addled thug named Mike Brown
Once thought he was king of the town
He charged at a cop
Who then had to.pop
Eight caps in him til he went down.
There once was a giant named Mike,
Who liked to find cops he could strike.
But he picked the wrong one,
And got shot by his gun,
And I ask you, what’s not to like?
A fat local thug stole some blunts
Then attacked a cop more than once
The ungentle giant
Was not so compliant
Now he’s been in the ground for four months
Anyone who supports Michael Brown
Is an asshole, a jerk and a clown.
So you think it’s unjust
That he’s turning to dust?
With that I can never get down.
The Ferguson rioters know
That commies are running their show
They cry “Hands up, don’t shoot!”
With their hands full of loot
And the cops have to let them all go.
There once was a thug called Mike Brown.
Bang bang, bang ba bang ba bang.
Bang bang ba bang bang,
Bang bang ba bang bang,
“Ya got me,” he said, thunk plop.
mike was the size of a blimp
he manhandled the shopkeeper, a shimp
the white law came alone
brown mike acted wrong
so burn down the town says race pimp
He fought the Law, and the Law won.
I don’t have the talent to come up with something, but I did chuckle at all of the above. Especially that one in the original post. Funny stuff!
There was a Choom guy named Barry
Who offered hope, change, and unity
Constitution be damned, he ruled with impunity
He took the wrong side on every issue, dis organizing every community
We must end the insanity and stop King Barry.
BFH
Glad you got that out of the way – difficult to think of a limerick without going to Nantucket.
I saw that limerick in the comments on treehouse. One of the mods was saying not to post “crass insensitive” crap or something like that, but that just got more replies
There once was a guy named Mike Brown,
Who thought he could rule the whole town,
His record was long,
but his time here was gone,
When he thought he was strong from a bong.
I know I’m not good at this.
But the rest were a riot!! Lol!
Thanks to that retard Mike Brown
Ungrammatical T-shirts abound
“I rather be” this
And “Gone to Soon” that
Worn by black and illiterate clowns
despite the verdict of jury
race pimps pumped all the fury
with buildings all burnt
and with nothing to be learnt
they await another town to bury
Michael Brown stole some cigars
To dip in formaldehyde jars
Eric Carter sold smokes
Until he was choked
Now tobacco has sparked a race war.
There once was a race pimp named Holder
Whose attempts to screw whitey grew bolder
With Trayvon long gone,
‘Til the next comes along,
He’ll use dead Mike Brown as his soldier.
There once was a father named Barry,
Whose sons, it seems, were quite scary.
They liked to pick fights,
With Indians, Hispanics, and whites,
That ended with them dead and buried.
So Ferguson burns in the night,
To honor Mike Brown, quite a sight.
Stores get looted and robbed
‘Cause a cop did his job
And the rule of law loses this fight.
And now for a haiku:
“Hands up, don’t shoot” is
The most infantile slogan
Since “Stranger, danger”
There was a 300 pound goon
Stole cigars from a shop
He made the mistake of picking on the wrong cop
And now he is gone to soon.
Had to try to work in the Tshirt line.
Racism runs rampant down south
As Sharpton shoots off his mouth.
He says, “Black lives matter!”
“Not that cop’s. He’s a cracker!”
Now everyone’s going to lose out.
In Ferguson, “Black lives matter!” they say.
Even Planned Parenthood, who if had their way
Would extinguish all blacks
with abortions out back
‘Cause to them no lives matter today.
Though thugs who hate whites are not rare
Twas one ’bout which nobody cared
Least not till he got shot
While attacking a cop
Now they say he was debonair
Haiku
Ferguson protest,
How doth thou show ignorance?
Hands up, do not shoot.
There once was a giant so gentle
Who grabbed a cop’s gun cause he’s mental
With cries of enslavement
Gave chase through the way went
Dying, dick first in the pavement.
Dashing through the street,
with a new flat screen TV
as long as its a riot
the cops, they won’t shoot me,
I Smash and rob and steal,
burning cars all day
even though the keys
are fifty feet away
I got to get what’s mine
’cause ‘The Man’ he beats us down
All Whitey’s stuff is Free
Because of Michael Brown
There once was a boy named Trayvon
Now him and Mike Brown are both gone
Their friends think “Hands Up Don’t Shoot”
Gives them license to burn and to loot
While local police keep their guns drawn
3/5 of a limerick:
There once was a big thug named brown
Now he’s buried six feet underground.
Sorry, that’s all I’ve got.
There once was a big boy named Mike
One day he went looking for a fight
A cop he tried to beat down
put a bullet through his crown
Now his neighborhood has become a blight.
Anonymous takes this one.
What’s not to like?
I’m laughing so hard but my co-workers think I’m crying because lately my little dog has been really sick. You guys made my week a little brighter.
There once was a bully named Brown,
Who enjoyed giving whitey a beatdown
on approaching a cop,
He dearly wished to bop,
The cop put him 6 feet down.
Too harsh?
Strong arm robbery
Goblin attacked copper
Coppers up 1-0
To change the subject…
There once was a black First Lady not so lean
Who kept her fingers dipped in the butters and creams
She ate everything in sight
From morning til noon til night
Til she no longer could fit her FAT ASS into her jeans!
the thugs are a looting
over some police shooting
they burn down their town
without so much as a frown
while al shapton’s on the radio polluting
These limericks are great. I’m not even going to try one, but i did just get this Sharpton joke in my email…
Al Sharpton was in Sears. He was there to protest the fact that most all of the washing machines were white. So the clerk called the store manager, who asked, “What’s the problem here, Reverend?” Sharpton pointed at the machines and loudly bemoaned the fact that most of them were white.
The manager replied, “Well, Reverend, it’s true that most of the washing machines are white, but if you’ll open the lids, you’ll see that all the agitators are black.”