Saw this a couple days ago. Im guilty of a few. My absolute worst offense. Birthday presents consisting of several World Gym women’s shirts. You know the one of the Gorilla standing on the world dead lifting a full bar. Not so good. The tears have it away. But in my Defence she said she wanted to start training with me. Like I tell her, I’m just a man.
Gave it away
My wife is a psychiatrist. I can’t win. I just say I’m sorry a lot.
She says she has the power to put my ass in an old folks home or
a Psych ward with just her signature. I say I’m sorry a lot.
And this is relevant on this thread how? WTF dude?
I freely admit I used one of those whenever the ex started acting like her Mom. Hard headed, self centered, inconsiderate, memememememe, etc.
She hated her Mom for being like that.
I would just call her by her Mom’s name when she got like that.
“OK, Raelene.”
Oh, it was on after that.
But she got the message.
Oops, forgot to check the auto-fill on the name
Hell, why be on this site at all if you hate cops?
I think Brian is still butt hurt from the last anti-cop crap he started.
That Mutha Fxcker detracted from my epic post LOL
lol!!
A SCAAAALE? lolol
I thought the kid was hilarious on that one!
“Run Dad!”
What were we talking about again?
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, ‘I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3 seconds.’ I bought her a scale. And that’s when the fight started..
I asked my wife, “Where do you want to go for our anniversary?”
It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.
“Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!” she said.
So I suggested, “How about the kitchen?”
And that’s when the fight started.
Yeah. Live your life in fear of angering you 190 pound female overlord. Cower before her and learn what to say and not say. What a joke. Women have been pedestalized in the West for about 1400 years. It’s over. Say what you want. She’s fat anyway so who cares if she’s mad?
Sometimes you just have to pay the price to get your sanity back.
Probably my greatest boo boo was telling her she was “just like my ex!” It was SO ON after that….. Never did that again, because I WAS DEAD!!!
Since we’re in a laughing mood… may I present my mommy the dancer…
One day a fourth-grade teacher asked the children what their mothers did for a living. All the typical answers came up — teacher, nurse, businesswoman, saleswoman,
doctor, lawyer, and so forth.
However, little Johnny was being uncharacteristically quiet, so when the teacher prodded him about his mother, he replied, “Well my mother’s an exotic dancer
in a cabaret and takes off all her clothes in front of men and they put money in her underwear. Sometimes, if the offer is really good, she will go home with the guy and stay with him all night for money.”
The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some exercises and then took little Johnny aside and asked him,
“Is that really true about your mother?”
“No,” the boy said, “she works for the Democratic National Committee and is helping to get Hillary Clinton to be our next President, but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids”.
“Well, you really don’t sweat that much considering how fat you are”
True story: My husband told his parents that I really would like a new coffee maker for my birthday. For his next birthday I went to Nordstrom and bought a pretty straw skimmer (hat) that I knew would go perfectly with a dress I had. It had silk flowers on it, too. It was an impressive box with an affectionate note inside. I never got household “tools” as a gift after that.
So Funny!! Thanks for sharing. 😀
My Ex-Wife loved toasted bagels.. for Mother’s day. you guessed it. I got her a bagel toaster.. I’m divorced now… and a lot happier.
There are too many selfish, self-serving and self-centered “basic b******s” out there.
I can make my own damn sandwich!
Best to avoid these situations by communicating only through lawyers….
Saw this a couple days ago. Im guilty of a few. My absolute worst offense. Birthday presents consisting of several World Gym women’s shirts. You know the one of the Gorilla standing on the world dead lifting a full bar. Not so good. The tears have it away. But in my Defence she said she wanted to start training with me. Like I tell her, I’m just a man.
Gave it away
My wife is a psychiatrist. I can’t win. I just say I’m sorry a lot.
She says she has the power to put my ass in an old folks home or
a Psych ward with just her signature. I say I’m sorry a lot.
Here is a good site for cop haters
http://www.copblock.org/
And this is relevant on this thread how? WTF dude?
I freely admit I used one of those whenever the ex started acting like her Mom. Hard headed, self centered, inconsiderate, memememememe, etc.
She hated her Mom for being like that.
I would just call her by her Mom’s name when she got like that.
“OK, Raelene.”
Oh, it was on after that.
But she got the message.
Oops, forgot to check the auto-fill on the name
Hell, why be on this site at all if you hate cops?
I think Brian is still butt hurt from the last anti-cop crap he started.
That Mutha Fxcker detracted from my epic post LOL
lol!!
A SCAAAALE? lolol
I thought the kid was hilarious on that one!
“Run Dad!”
What were we talking about again?
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, ‘I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3 seconds.’ I bought her a scale. And that’s when the fight started..
http://www.carent.com/jokes/fight_started.html
I asked my wife, “Where do you want to go for our anniversary?”
It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.
“Somewhere I haven’t been in a long time!” she said.
So I suggested, “How about the kitchen?”
And that’s when the fight started.
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/jokes/read/80502688/
Yeah. Live your life in fear of angering you 190 pound female overlord. Cower before her and learn what to say and not say. What a joke. Women have been pedestalized in the West for about 1400 years. It’s over. Say what you want. She’s fat anyway so who cares if she’s mad?
Sometimes you just have to pay the price to get your sanity back.
Probably my greatest boo boo was telling her she was “just like my ex!” It was SO ON after that….. Never did that again, because I WAS DEAD!!!
Reminds me of this, from a few years ago.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Twivg7GkYts
Beware of the Doghouse.
Since we’re in a laughing mood… may I present my mommy the dancer…
One day a fourth-grade teacher asked the children what their mothers did for a living. All the typical answers came up — teacher, nurse, businesswoman, saleswoman,
doctor, lawyer, and so forth.
However, little Johnny was being uncharacteristically quiet, so when the teacher prodded him about his mother, he replied, “Well my mother’s an exotic dancer
in a cabaret and takes off all her clothes in front of men and they put money in her underwear. Sometimes, if the offer is really good, she will go home with the guy and stay with him all night for money.”
The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some exercises and then took little Johnny aside and asked him,
“Is that really true about your mother?”
“No,” the boy said, “she works for the Democratic National Committee and is helping to get Hillary Clinton to be our next President, but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids”.
“Well, you really don’t sweat that much considering how fat you are”
True story: My husband told his parents that I really would like a new coffee maker for my birthday. For his next birthday I went to Nordstrom and bought a pretty straw skimmer (hat) that I knew would go perfectly with a dress I had. It had silk flowers on it, too. It was an impressive box with an affectionate note inside. I never got household “tools” as a gift after that.
So Funny!! Thanks for sharing. 😀
My Ex-Wife loved toasted bagels.. for Mother’s day. you guessed it. I got her a bagel toaster.. I’m divorced now… and a lot happier.
There are too many selfish, self-serving and self-centered “basic b******s” out there.
I can make my own damn sandwich!
Best to avoid these situations by communicating only through lawyers….