19 Comments on A Florida Man story, with strings attached.
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Comments are closed.
iOTWreport.com ©2024 ----- iOTWreport is not responsible for the content of comments. All opinions in comments are solely the commenter's.
I was expecting a story about somebody doing something strange.😜
Well, Florida usually comes up with something more memorable. Doesn’t sound like they have any reason to hold him. Let him go into the custody of Debbie Wassermann Schultz.
Bolognavirus?
So he wouldn’t forget…..?
search rectum for tampon
Maybe he’s in a church choir and is looking to hit those high notes.
Going fishing?
Chocking the chicken? Well hung?
Marionette fail.
trying to get the cat to play w/ him?
I’m gonna steal a punch line from another joke and say “That’s what gives him a siren!”
String bikini?
I lived in Auburndale when I was 6.
It was like Mayberry then.
His wife wanted him to pick up some bread from the market and he didn’t want to forget!
The story reminds me of a joke. Stop me if you’ve heard it…
A fellow was having dinner at a nice restaurant and he accidentally dropped his spoon on the floor. He called his waiter over and asked him to get him a clean one.
The waiter instead reached inside his jacket and pulled out a clean spoon and handed it to the diner.
“How remarkable!” said the diner. “Do you always carry a clean spoon in your pocket?”
“Yes, sir,” replied the waiter. “In fact, I also have a knife and fork, and a clean napkin in my other pocket.”
“That’s very clever and thoughtful of you,” said the patron, clearly impressed.
“Not at all, sir. The idea actually came from the owner. He wants not only to provide good service to our diners, but also to save his staff time and make them more efficient. He’s implemented quite a few such ideas.”
The diner asks, “What else does he have you carry around?”
“Well, I also have a salt and pepper set, and I’m sure to have a working lighter for the candles. But the one thing that save me the most time is this method to avoid spending the time to wash my hands after using the urinal, but still remain clean and sanitary.”
The waiter points to his pants zipper. “See this little piece of string at the top of the fly? The other end is tied to my penis, so when I have to urinate all I have to do is unzip and tug gently on the string. I don’t have to touch myself at all!”
Puzzled, the diner says, “OK, I see how you get it out ‘no hands’ but how do you get it back in so you can zip up.”
“Well, sir, I’m not sure what the other waiters do, but I just use this spoon…”
Andrew gillam is back out?
I’m not sure of the problem, man can’t run around without clothes now, damn females can.
@ Uncle Al – as I read the story and through the comments I was thinking of a story with the same punch line. Only the version I heard he was a server in a cafeteria.
Apocryphal story, I hope is true. Sometime in the 70’s, A small town in Southern Oregon, Jacksonville, was having it’s annual Pioneer Days parade. Streaking was popular then, so of course, some nut streaked the parade…right into the arms of Frank Carter, the grizzled old cop (the only cop at the time). Frank handcuffed the evildoer behind his back, and marched him off to the town jail. Along the parade route.