How’s The Weather where You Are? – IOTW Report

How’s The Weather where You Are?

Wednesday, 2 February 2022, 18:00 MJA Uncategorized 104

h/t Doc.

104 Comments on How’s The Weather where You Are?

  6. Canโ€™t complain. Or more accurately, afraid to complain lest we get another shit storm that blindsided us and knocked out power for 7 days. A miserable experience.

    So Iโ€™m gonna be very very quiet. I do not wish to provoke the wrath of God.

    14

  8. 65 here in south central SC this afternoon…. started out at a frigid 38.
    It’s FJBs fault!
    FJB/LGB

    6

  9. 55 on the Texas Gulf Coast with fog
    and heavy cloud cover. Gloomy suicide weather…
    6 more weeks and mass quantities of green-yellow
    sneezy pollen.

    4

  12. Upstate NY. Pipes frozen Monday -6. Space heater in the crawl space died. Ford wouldn’t start, battery was new in November. Today its in the lower 40s, picked up 2nd ton of coal also today. Rain tonight and all day tomorrow – then snow on Friday. If you want to make God laugh, make plans.

    14

  13. Hey Loco, you ever drive north?

    I need some more mortars from that fireworks stand next to the lil’ ALien Inn tourist trap/whorehouse.

    I can drive up to vegas to pick em up.

    6

  14. FYI – Temperature Drop Milestones

    Degrees (Fahrenheit)

    65 Hawaiians declare a two-blanket night

    60 Californians put on sweaters (if they can find one)

    50 Miami residents turn on the heat

    45 Vermont residents go to outdoor concerts

    40 You can see your breath
    Californians shiver uncontrollably
    Minnesotans go swimming

    35 Italian cars don’t start

    32 Water freezes
    Richard Simmons puts on long pants

    25 Ohio water freezes
    Californians weep pitiably
    Minnisotans eat ice cream
    Canadians go swimming

    20 DemocRats begin to talk about the homeless
    New York city water freezes
    Miami residents plan vacation further south

    15 French cars don’t start
    Cat insists on sleeping in the bed with you

    10 You need jumper cables to get the car going

    5 American cars don’t start

    0 Alaskans put on T-shirts

    -10 German cars don’t start
    Eyes freeze shut when you blink

    -15 You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo
    Arkansans stick tongue on metal objects
    Miami residents cease to exist

    -20 Cat insists on sleeping in pajamas with you
    Republicans actually do something about the homeless
    Minnisotans shovel snow off the roof
    Japanese cars don’t start

    -25 Too cold to think
    You need jumper cables to get the driver going

    -30 You plan a two week hot bath
    Swedish cars don’t start
    Politicians actually put their hands in their own pockets

    -40 Californians disappear
    Minnisotans button top button
    Canadians put on sweaters
    Your car helps you plan your trip south

    -50 Congressional hot air freezes
    Alaskans close the bathroom window

    -80 Hell freezes over
    Polar bears move south
    Green Bay Packer fans order hot cocoa at the game

    26

  15. 61 and sunny with a very chilly ocean wind.

    Speaking of “ground hog day”, my meat processor said my wild boar will be ready for consumption in a werk or two. ๐Ÿ˜‹๐Ÿ— I’m having him turned into smoked sausages(Italian provolone, Bavarian cheese and blueberry breakfast) and whatever other cuts they manage. Yum! Now I’m getting hungry.

    10

  20. Snow day today in Boulder, about 10 inches last night so I got to try my snowshoes today. Another few inches tonight. Upper 20s. Should be in the 40s on Saturday when I do a creek plunge with a couple dozen other crazy people.
    CrackerBaby – I am pretty seriously considering moving to SC later this year, likely south of Charleston (and close to the beach!) It isn’t the cold so much here, per se, as that the weather keeps you stuck at home for days at a time. And it’s a pretty blue area, I’m looking for more conservative people.

    11

  21. Well, grab 4 or 5. Should be around 150.

    Wait….Nevada has a mask mandate? The fudge didn’t anybody say anything? Hell I got to Cali and was confronted by a German demanding I wear a mask.

    No really, German.

    So problematic.

    Anyway….fireworks. Totes illegal and wonderful to use for protests that may or may be already marked down on the calendar.

    6

  22. Upper 30โ€™s/low 40โ€™s. Foggy and misty. Sunsets now after 5pm-the worst dark days of western WA are over. Irises, crocuses and hyacinths are starting to peek through the dirt. ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ‘

    10

  30. Chicago. Snow began last night and all day today. About 8-10 inches accumulation. A little more expected tomorrow. 24 degrees but getting colder in the next couple of days.

    My little rescue terrier HATES the snow.

    7

  33. We’re heading into a winter storm with possibility of a lot of ice. Which normally wouldn’t bother me too much but I’m just coming off a week in the hospital from covid. I’m doing much, much better but am on oxygen at home, at least for the next week or so. So power outages are not my friend at the moment. Prayers requested for my anxiety level if nothing else.
    Bev

    17

  35. South of the Cleveburg secondary snowbelt. We had 17 inches of snow. Warmed up to 45 yesterday and today so a lot of melting and ice in the driveway. Now it’s raining to be followed by temp drop, ice, 14-17 inches of heavy wet snow. Giant jugs of water stored in case the electric goes off and the well pump won’t run. Books, food, beer, coffee, tea, cat food, cat litter, candles, batteries, kerosene heater, etc. Yesterday the furnaces were cleaned, tested and inspected so good to go.

    3

  43. Milwaukee 15 (above) no snow.
    That’s ’cause I fixed the snowblower last weekend.
    BTW, the groundhog out back saw Fauci’s shadow this morning, six more years of mask wearing.

    5

  45. It’s currently 24 degrees in Spokane, Wash. with a little light fluffy snow, we might get an inch of new snow tonight and the next few days aren’t going to be bad with temps up into the low 40’s by Sunday and the sun is now setting at almost 5 PM which is a great thing. I’m ready for Spring and glad we’re about halfway thru Winter.

    3

  49. And I cannot wait for the -5 they are predicting for tonight. My family lives about 35 miles SW of me and 3000′ higher, and they only got 3 inches. The joys of living in, and near, the Rockies and the various weather flows.

    1

  50. Let’s see…It’s -11f right now at 6pm. In 12 hours it is supposed to get down to -33f. That is not including wind chill. That’s life up here on the frozen tundra of NoDak….

    5

  53. LocoBlancoSaltine
    FEBRUARY 2, 2022 AT 6:18 PM
    “TRF posing as SNS is why I come hereโ€ฆ”

    TRF as SNS
    FEBRUARY 2, 2022 AT 6:19 PM
    “Hey now! I resemble that remark!”

    …nah, you’re not long-winded enough and you’re actually funny, try harder for the Snooze Cup…

    5

  55. RogerF
    FEBRUARY 2, 2022 AT 6:41 PM
    “LCD โ€“ creek plunge? I am too old for that *$&%. That does not mean I havenโ€™t done it, but at my age, I would probably need to call SNS to save me”

    …I’m too old for cold water now. I only do hot tun rescues now.

    3

  65. Nevada frontier– freezin’ ass cold. 20 degrees and high winds.

    On another note, happy birthday to my sweet mother, who was born in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania 88 years ago today. Happy heavenly birthday, mom!

    8

  67. I do have stories about being on the ski patrol and it was snowing and blowing and i didn’t realize i wasn’t moving until I planted a ski pole in the snow and it didn’t move. Visibility of about 3 feet. WTF were skiers thinking? Why were you even out in that weather? Why wouldn’t you let me get indoors?

    5

  73. Oklahoma 23 degrees, it was sleeting this morning, dry and cold all day with a strong north wind. It’s been sleeting again for the last hour. Still waiting on the snow they’re saying we’re getting.

    I hate winter, I hate ice and I hate snow.

    1

  74. @ LCD,
    be advised that the “close to the beach” area is full of raging faggots. I am 2 hours from Charleston and might be too close.
    FJB/LGB

    2

  75. I hate it when the snow falls here in Boulder, Colorado. I canโ€™t stand getting awakened at five oโ€™clock in the morning when my girlfriend is outside scraping ice and shoveling all that damned white stuff. Then she comes back inside around six-thirty, all cold and wet, asking me to make her hot chocolate.

    6

  76. Burr….burrr…rrrrrr..
    “FEBRUARY 2, 2022 AT 7:42 PM
    Cโ€™mon SNS, olโ€™ buddy ol palโ€ฆ. you should just ask, โ€œwhatโ€™s brown and stickyโ€.”

    Ok, what’s brown and sticky?

    Peanut butter?

    2

  78. @CrackerBaby – good to know. I’ll rent first until I get a better idea of where I want to live. I do want to be near the ocean somehow though. Enjoyed Mt. Pleasant last year.

  79. Burr, pistachio aficionado
    FEBRUARY 2, 2022 AT 8:52 PM
    “What? You missed it?

    Brad figured it out.

    Iโ€™ve moved on to discussing my Rosa Parks joke.”

    I like Milk Dud bra better.

    Maybe you can work Milk Duds into Rosa Park’s bra in your joke, seems like a good fit.

    But add some peanut butter for a Reece’s Peanut Butter D Cup.

    1

  84. Brad
    FEBRUARY 2, 2022 AT 9:07 PM
    “SNS

    None of that stuff ur speaken about gets sticky when it melts. It gets slippery. Look, this is sticky. Even though itโ€™s not brown.”

    Depends on your use of the word “sticky”.

    If you get on this bus and people catch you putting a bra on Rosa Parks here for the purposes of filling it with Milk Duds and peanut butter, things will get sticky for you REAL fast as the situation heats up…

    http://darkroom.baltimoresun.com/2015/12/montgomery-bus-boycott-60th-anniversary/handout-picture-shows-statue-of-rosa-parks-who-refused-to-give-up-her-seat-to-a-white-man-on-a-bus-sparking-the-montgomery-bus-boycott/

    1

  88. Brad
    FEBRUARY 2, 2022 AT 9:07 PM

    ..I AM puzzled about what that cover art is saying, tho.

    Is it HIS gum and he got it stuck there while, ah, “chewing the scenery”?

    Is it the gum of the LAST guy that chewed her scenery?

    Is it HER gum and he made her spit it out in his hand, then just forgot?

    …so many questions, and no Scorpions to answer…

    https://youtu.be/iMaJyUQfwv4

    1

  92. Listen, you guys just need to relax.

    First, there’s an actual way to construct a joke….several ways.

    Here’s one my kid told me.

    “Which president is the scariest president?”
    “Rushmore, because he’s got four heads.”

    Absurdist reductivism.

    Here’s one my 9 year old told me.

    “Hey Papa, do you know any dairy product jokes that aren’t cheesy?”

    Simple play on words.

    What’s brown and sticky?…a stick.

    Upsetting expectations. Also…it’s silly.

    And then there’s the Rosa Parks joke…..

    You just gotta’ Dukes of Hazzard a joke like that. Take the jump at 100 miles an hour while playin’ Dixie on the car horn and fuggin’ stick the landing. You can’t half ass it.

    If a joke “fails”. Double down on that sum’ bitch. HARD.

    And holocaust jokes are always funny.

    .
    .
    .
    No…no…..skip that last one…..I’m just messin’ with ya’.

    Don’t go for holocaust jokes.

    You’ll always wind up gettin’ burned.

    3

  93. Eastern part of SW OH.

    43 degrees, soaking wet, waiting for it to turn into sheets of ice below and become frozen darts from above, and take out all our leaning power poles that are endemic to semi-rural hill country.

    Took the power door off the chicken coop just in case. Factory’s shut down tomorrow, should be a fun restart Friday if the power there goes out and the robots lose their mastering…

    1

  94. Burr, fireside chat
    FEBRUARY 2, 2022 AT 9:44 PM

    “Donโ€™t go for holocaust jokes.”

    …so, skip the one about how many people fit in a Volkswagen.

    Gotcha.

    (Scratches something out)

    …just as well, kids today never saw a built-in ashtray in a car anyway…

    1

  95. O.M. GOTT.

    I can’t believe you went there after I specifically said NOT to make holocaust jokes.

    Have you no concentration?

    You should be sent to some sort of camp to help with that.

    2

  96. Extreme SE Texas! Woke up to heavy fog this morning. It warmed up during the day and exceeded 70 degrees. Very humid as usual. Some sun today but heavy overcast late in the day. It’s almost 10:00PM and it’s still 66 degrees. Supposed to turn cool tomorrow.

    2

  97. I see all you muther trucker fxckers are avoiding my last very important question.
    WHAT IS NO LONGER GAY?

    In case you wonder, this has a very large impact on society as we know it, even on the REZ Burr.

    3

  99. While we wait for Brad, lemme’ hep you out if all your holocaust and/or Hitler jokes bomb.

    Maybe you’re at your in laws,I dunno’. Anyway, what you do is, you look em’ right in the eye and you say “gosh, Mrs Terwilliger, it sounds like…like you have a problem with the Nazis.”

    And then she’ll say “YES I DO!!!”….cuz it’ll probably be chick complainin’….

    Then you say…..well gee…..what did they ever do to you?

    1

  100. Shit, I was hoping for greater audience participation in this, but this threads lifespan is short.
    It’s wearing your freakien fuzzy bunny slippers through out the day like dress shoes or work boots. What the actual fuck.

    4

Comments are closed.

iOTWreport.com ยฉ2024 ----- iOTWreport is not responsible for the content of comments. All opinions in comments are solely the commenter's.