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The evening edition. Watch here!
Comments are closed.
iOTWreport.com ©2024 ----- iOTWreport is not responsible for the content of comments. All opinions in comments are solely the commenter's.
In Iran, everyone’s scared of spiders, but In Iraq, no phobia.
“How many Frenchmen can’t be wrong? You were wrong, and so was she.” Groucho Marx.
How do you separate the men from the boys in DC? With a crowbar.
What is the official AMA medical term for the act of nose-picking?
Boogerectomy.
Just after mostly non-verbal President Calvin Coolidge died, great wit Dorothy Parker asked “How could they tell?”.
In 1975 urinals were 50% universal. Now it’s anyone’s guess.
A lawyer was confused and hassled with mathematics of a case…
… So he asked his secretary:
“If I give you USD 3 million less 17.5%, how much would you take off?”
Secretary: “Everything Sir! Dress, Underwear, Everything.”
From Mathematicians jokes
A nuther Mathematician joke –
Dawgsqueeze played high school football in Detroit. He was a great running back, but a really poor student. At graduation, he didn’t have enough credits, but he was a great football star and the students held a rally and demanded the principal give him a diploma anyway. They were so insistent that the principal agreed that if Dawgsqueeze could answer one question correctly, he would give him a diploma.
The one question test was held in the auditorium and all the students packed the place. It was standing room only. The principal was on the stage and told him to come up. Diploma in hand, the principal said: “Dawgsqueeze, if you can answer this one question correctly, I’ll give you your diploma.”
“Dawgsqueeze, how much is three times seven?”
Dawgsqueeze looked up at the ceiling and then down at his shoes, pondering the question. All the students began chanting, “Graduate him anyway! Graduate him anyway!”
Then Dawgsqueez held up his hand and the auditorium became silent. He said, “I think I know the answer. Three times seven is twenty-one.”
A hush fell over the auditorium and then all the other students began to chant:
“Give him another chance! Give him another chance!”
There once was a man from Madras
Whose balls were made of brass
In stormy weather
They clanged together
And sparks flew out of his ass
From best dirty limericks
God gave you toes as a device for finding furniture in the dark!
What’s the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?
One less drunk.
Happy St Paddy’s Day!
@George Carlin
George, I don’t get the joke. Can you explain it?….uh, never mind.
Heard the joke about the fence?
I haven’t got over it yet.
Joe Biden got 81 million votes!
“I met a man with a wooden leg named Wilson.”
“What was the name of his other leg?”
(from an old Disney movie)
Typhoid Mary, a syphilectic midget and the world’s last surviving leper walk into a bar
Bartender takes one look at them and says .. What is this, some kind of sick joke?
But did the leper leave a tip.
AS man with one eye made of wood goes into a nightclub. He sees an old broad there that looks reasonably attractive, except she’s got a wooden leg. He goes up to her anyway and asks her her name and if she’d like to dance.
She says her name is Peg and says loudly “Would I, Would I, Would I”. The guy takes that as an insult and yells back at her “Peg Leg, Peg Leg, Peg Leg”.
Yes the leper did leave a tip
“Never share a cigar with a leper”