Find a Business Reply Mail card from some organization you hate, preferably something associated with the Dem party or GBLTs or satanists, tape the card securely to the pumpkin, and unload where it blocks the post office loading dock.
6
Well it is Colorado… The seasonal solution would be to make pumpkin spiced dope!
6
uh … make a two-ton pie?
5
Quick, someone tell Linus Van Pelt that it’s really the Great pumpkin.
4
God bless Charles M. Schulz!
5
One ton punkin chunkin.
4
Call Elon Musk and send it into space.
3
He could send his kids to college by selling the seeds.
2
You’re going to need an extra-large trebuchet, catapult or giant air cannon to launch a 1-ton pumpkin very far. But it’d be fun as all get out to watch just as long as you’re not downrange when it makes a ginormous splat.
3
Sell it to Peter Pumpkin-eater
2
Last week a ~400lb. pumpkin appeared on a 4 foot square pallet on the side of the Bay road I live along. Monday two more mysteriously appeared alongside the first one. You’d need a serious trebuchet to launch one of these gourds!
2
cultural weight-appropriation, said the ghettopotamus
“What Does One Do With a 1-Ton Pumpkin?”
…Drop it from a crane as a form of execution on the next person who wants to make a Pumpkin Spice version of anything.
“What Does One Do With a 1-Ton Pumpkin?”
…this…
https://kawarthanow.com/2018/10/31/see-canadas-biggest-jack-o-lantern-on-display-in-kawartha-lakes/
Buy a really big pie pan.
Find a Business Reply Mail card from some organization you hate, preferably something associated with the Dem party or GBLTs or satanists, tape the card securely to the pumpkin, and unload where it blocks the post office loading dock.
Well it is Colorado… The seasonal solution would be to make pumpkin spiced dope!
uh … make a two-ton pie?
Quick, someone tell Linus Van Pelt that it’s really the Great pumpkin.
God bless Charles M. Schulz!
One ton punkin chunkin.
Call Elon Musk and send it into space.
He could send his kids to college by selling the seeds.
You’re going to need an extra-large trebuchet, catapult or giant air cannon to launch a 1-ton pumpkin very far. But it’d be fun as all get out to watch just as long as you’re not downrange when it makes a ginormous splat.
Sell it to Peter Pumpkin-eater
Last week a ~400lb. pumpkin appeared on a 4 foot square pallet on the side of the Bay road I live along. Monday two more mysteriously appeared alongside the first one. You’d need a serious trebuchet to launch one of these gourds!
cultural weight-appropriation, said the ghettopotamus
“What Does One Do With a 1-Ton Pumpkin?”
…Drop it from a crane as a form of execution on the next person who wants to make a Pumpkin Spice version of anything.