12 Comments on Bad Joke Friday

  1. How many morons does it take to replace a light bulb?

    Five.

    One moron to hold the bulb and two morons on each leg to hoist up the first moron and then turn him in a clockwise manner until the bulb is firmly in place.

    5

  4. Recent MSN turd-grade headlines. MSN writers have shit for brains:

    Shakira Channels Her Inner She-Wolf at Global Citizen Festival 2025…
    -I suspect she howled at the moon and showed her fangs

    How cute! Little baby hippo just won’t get out of the water.
    -could be because hippos prefer being in the water, not out of it. Their name means “water horse” for a reason

    ‘You Don’t Look Like You’: ‘Pitch Perfect ‘ Actress Rebel Wilson’s Unrecognizable Look Has Fans Doing a Double Take
    -A double take is necessary to take in all her bulk

    Jane Fonda on Trump: ‘This is a very chilling time’
    -It won’t be long till she’ll be Chilled forever.

    TV Cast Reunions That Made Our Nostalgia-Loving Hearts Swell.
    -Not me…they make my lower intestinal tract swell

    5

  5. A random photograph of NHL star Connor McDavid shows that he always smokes a cigarette when he plays hockey:

    Use following link to see photo:

    B/R NHL Writers’ Roundtable: Best Team for Connor McDavid in 2026?

    Once, McDavid scored a goal by blowing cigarette smoke into the face of the opposing team’s goalie who then lost sight of the puck. At first the goal was disallowed but after video review the refs allowed it, who ruled that the goalie had averted his face and that act allowed McDavid to score.

    2

  6. Part two of the account of our intrepid Bodynauts on their historic voyage way up the inside of a nostril.

    After they renewed their history making journey, the Bodynauts came across a grove of trees and smashed into one.

    Commander Ralph Krumph radioed the Mission Command Center: Looks like we’ve got some trees in the way…we’ve actually hit one of them. I’ve got to go outside the capsule and assess the damage.

    Mission Command: Those are not trees, they’re nose hairs. Back when you went through training we told you to expect those.

    Cmdr Krumph: Roger. They were swaying back and forth just like palm trees. We all thought they were trees.

    Mission Command: What is your assessment of the damage?

    Cmdr Krumph: It’s just a fender bender. No big deal.

    Mission Command: Go ahead, proceed towards your destination. Avoid colliding with any more “trees”.

    Cmdr Krumph: Roger that.

    Continued next week…

    2

  10. A father and his son went to buy a Christmas tree.
    After they picked one out, the boy says,
    “Dad, are you gonna put that up yourself?”

    “No, I’m gonna put it up in the living room.” 😛

    5

  12. A big semi carrying 10,000 eggs overturned and spilled its contents all over the freeway. Nobody was injured even though some cars slithered around on the spilled eggs.

    The police report called it an “eggcident”.

Comments are closed.

iOTWreport.com ©2025 ----- iOTWreport is not responsible for the content of comments. All opinions in comments are solely the commenter's.