Swiss officials confirmed this week that a former Miss Switzerland finalist met a horrific end when her husband allegedly strangled her to death before dismembering her body, which he “pureed” in a blender.
The murder of 38-year-old Kristina Joksimovic occurred in February this year near the city of Basel in Switzerland. Police arrested her 41-year-old husband, simply referred to as “Thomas,” who later appealed for his release but was rejected. He reportedly confessed to the murder roughly one month after his arrest.
Officials in the case say the murder may have stemmed from “mental illness.” Though he claimed to have committed the murder to protect himself after Kristina allegedly attacked him with a knife, medical experts said they found no sign of self-defense and that her cause of death was by strangulation. After allegedly killing Kristina, Thomas then reportedly proceeded to dismember her body with a jigsaw, knife, and garden sheers. Per the New York Post: more
“Will
itshe blend?”Yes.
“But there’s booze in the blender,
and soon it will render,
that frozen concoction that helps with me hang on…”
He should die the same way. Only alive.
How the Indians would impose well-deserved justice. Not fiction:
https://thelibrary.org/lochist/turnbo/V28/ST815.html
“After allegedly killing Kristina, Thomas then reportedly proceeded to dismember her body with a jigsaw, knife, and garden sheers.”
Up close and personal, that’s some nasty shit right there. If he drank any of that smoothie he might be a Haitian.
Whenever I think of such horrendous actions I can not help but think of leftie godless anti-Americas that want this country destroyed at any cost.
I’ll drink Swiss Miss, but not Miss Swiss.
And they call it puppy love…
Thomas never heard of divorce?
Probably the wrong color, but sounds like he should be mayor of San Francisco or Chicago.
There’s a frog in a blender going 100 mph joke in there somewhere.
If theres a blender that’s up to that task, whoever makes it needs to use that in their advertising.
But Im not sure exactly HOW…
And I have to agree with Wild Bill. If youre trying to dismantle someones corpse with wholly inefficient gardening and kitchen tools and you keep at it despite the insurmountable challenges those close-in instruments present, thats some SERIOUS hatred right there…
Maybe he used a giant bassamatic.
@SNS — I think a Blendtec may be up to the task:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=AsTZm7QtY84
Unky – An outstanding video! It will blend!
Cynic 12:44
You win Teh Interwebz for today.
Well played!
Uncle Al
Friday, 13 September 2024, 8:42 at 8:42 am
“@SNS — I think a Blendtec may be up to the task:”
…perhaps a few times, but that motor probably isnt set up for continuous duty and doesnt have a lot of cooling, and considering the sheer volume he would have to run through it (assuming his portioning tool/garden shears dont give out) due to its limited capacity, its not going to get a lot of rest for cooling between its heaviest duty cycles…
…also, what then? He cant drink it, the blood will cause vomiting. Its a good size/consistency for flushing, but if it goes to a septic system it will be discoverable on smell alone. You cant pour it into your garden, the dogs would go nuts.
Im just not sure what you gain by reducing an entire adult human being to many gallons of bloody frappé even if you CAN pull it off, is what Im saying…
Also, Ive seen a guy after he was run through an industrial mixer. You definitely wouldnt want an open casket viewing after that, but the bits WERE still recognizably human…
Forget the drama details;
how did it taste and
do you recommend it?