OddityCentral: 42-year-old Jarnail Singh was recently admitted to The Corporate Hospital in Gurdaspur, India, after complaining of severe stomach pains and general weakness. What he failed to mention was that he had voluntarily swallowed 40 sharp metal knives over the past couple of months.
After asking Singh a few questions and performing the routine checkup, doctors were puzzled about the cause of the pain, so they did an ultrasound. MORE
Sounds like someone’s not too sharp.
Oh, wait —
Gee Wally, I’ll bet they made Jarnail Singh…
I know an old lady who swallowed a fly
I don’t know why, she swallowed the fly,
perhaps she’ll die.
I know an old lady who swallowed a spider,
that wiggled and wiggled and wiggled inside her.
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly,
But I don’t know why she swallowed the fly.
Perhaps she’ll die.
Great old song by Burl Ives. Funny too.
Maybe this anecdote tops it. I don’t know.
About a month ago one of my co-workers was fired after 12 years on the job (thus disproving the old adage, “You can’t fire a civil servant; it’s impossible.”) He was fired for a lot of things, basically for being an asshole. I know there were a lot of complaints from female litigants about goo-goo eyes, flirting, and other unprofessional behaviors. Because he was fired for cause, he could not collect unemployment.
This guy has a parimutuel license, and the Satatoga racetrack’s season is the month of August. He figured he’d go up there and make some bank while figuring out his next move.
When I got to work yesterday I found put that he had been arrested last week for making $11,700 in personal bets using the track’s money. He is charged with third-degree grand larceny, which in New York State carries a potential jail term of 7 years.
Upvote this comment if you think this guy is the biggest dumbass in the history of humanity.
Every time I hear Obama or Hillary’s gawdawful screeching, I feel like swallowing knives.
They should have waited to see if he could shit them out