h/t Doc. Who always sends me fun stuff.
COME HERE OFTEN? …
IF SO, COULD YOU TELL ME WHERE I AM?
.
.
HEY BABY, WANNA HELP ME TEST MY NEW HIP REPLACEMENT?
THAT PRETTY SMILE OF YOURS WOULD SURE LOOK GOOD IN A GLASS ON
MY NIGHTSTAND.
DO YOU HAVE AN OXYGEN TANK?
BECAUSE YOU TOOK MY BREATH AWAY.
[Feel free to add more in the comment section]
The Easter Island Fashion Model (with Churchill Downs SyndromeMonsieur) AKA Jean Fraud Gigilo Goodhair’s favorite line is “Hay Babe?”
Edit – Dogone cut & paste…
The Easter Island Fashion Model (with Churchill Downs Syndrome) AKA Monsieur Jean Fraud Gigilo Goodhair’s favorite line is “Hay Babe?”
My head is not bald, that’s a solar panel for a sex machine.
I don’t bother with pickup lines, I just pick up the whole child and do whatever I wants with it.
C’mon msn, it’s not like they’d be old enough to understand, and I’m not ASKING anyway, plus the Secret Service will hold ’em down in they’re too squirrley, so *whispers* why waste breath on a line?
After the first pick up line, they leave me alone after my response. They’re taken aback by my crass Viagra comments. I don’t hold back….
Just wait until you see the size of my……social security check.
I make house calls.
My adjustable bed, or yours?
I wont even need Viagra for you, you so fine
Are you in Law Enforcement .. cause you just put me in cardiac arrest
I had a great pickup line ..but I forgot
Is your name Vaccine? ‘Cause you just made my heart stop!
I’ve fallen, but I can get it up.
I’m going off my Lasix so I don’t piss away my time with YOU.
you look like that angel i saw when i had my stroke.
You’re so fine, I’d pull out my catheter for you!
*points at her butt* Pardon me, is this seat taken?
I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR LINES! HURRY UP BEFORE I LOSE MY EREC…DOH!
I’m not losing my hair. It’s just migrating down my neck and onto my back.
Him: Did you say something?
Her: What?
Him: What?
Her: What?
You’re so hot I wet my Depends to cool off. – Pedo Joe
OOOhhhh Baby, lets share Depends…hop in.
Old man sits in the common room of a nursing home.
Old woman wheels up in front of him and says, “Superpussy!”
He says, “What?”
She says, louder, “Superpussy!”
Puzzled he shrugs and says, “Huh?”
She rolls up a little closer, pulls up her dress and yells, “SUPERPUSSY!!”
He says, “OOOh… I’ll have the soup.”
I really dig your slippers.
Why dont we go back to my place .. and compare Medicare dental plans
Lift up the hem of your skirt and show me your boobs.
You guys are killing me LMAO. I’m dealing with this now, my 82 year old dad has been on a seniors dating website and he’s like a randy teenager out cruising for the babes.
The difficult part for me is his eyesight is shot to hell, he keeps having TIAs, and his car keeps breaking down as he drives long distances to get with the honeys. My hubby wants me to take away dad’s car keys before he kills someone.
Lord Jesus help me…
All you bastards making fun of this post should slowly sit down and…. i forget.
I have a 93 year old Mom and 90 year old Dad living with me.God bless them. However 4 two year olds would be much easier to handle.
However I’m sure i was just as much a nuisance in my day.
“What I used to do all night now takes me all night to do.”
Honest, I thought she said a cute vagina, not acute angina….