Snake orgy prompts partial closure of Florida city park – IOTW Report

Snake orgy prompts partial closure of Florida city park

Saturday, 22 February 2020, 3:30 MJA Uncategorized 19

BREITBART:

Washington (AFP) – A city in Florida closed off part of a park after residents spotted dozens of snakes which had apparently gathered for their annual coupling.

“It appears they have congregated for mating,” the City of Lakeland Parks and Recreation Department said on Facebook with a photo of one of the serpents seen in the park by Lake Hollingsworth, southwest of Orlando.

Officials on Thursday sealed off an area where the amorous reptiles had gathered for their pre-Valentine’s Day tryst with caution tape.

“This is for the protection of the public and the snakes,” the department said.

“They are non-venomous and generally not aggressive as long as people do not disturb them. Once the mating is over they should go their separate ways.”

The slippery customers were identified as harmless native Florida water snakes.

“They are generally found resting in tree limbs over water or basking on shorelines. They are an important part of the ecosystem and should not be disturbed,” the department said.

Resident Tim Newberry, whose Facebook photos of snakes in the park alerted city authorities, told 10News he saw about 25 that day.

19 Comments on Snake orgy prompts partial closure of Florida city park

  1. They are non-venomous and generally not aggressive as long as people do not disturb them. Once the mating is over they should go their separate ways.

    The new mission statement for President Pete’s National Park Service.

    8

  3. …when I first saw “Snake Orgy” I thought that maybe they had a Democrat debate in Florida for some reason.

    Then I saw “non-venomous” and realized it wasn’t…

    10

  16. …y’know, “Snake Orgy” WOULD be a cool band name.

    Anyone here know how to play guitar? And bass? And drums? And sing? And not be, you know, over 30?

    …I’ll be happy to manage you guys and let you use my cool band name, if you pay me and don’t require me to ever show up at practice…

    5

  17. …my wife has an 8 year old pet Bearded Dragon, which is a largish desert creature with a snakey head, but this particular one hadn’t pooped in a month and was acting dopsy, so off to the vet we go.

    This lucky guy did some test but also determined that the reptile needed a good flushing out, so he took him into another room and got an assistant to figure out wherever the sphincter is on this creature (I personally do not know and don’t WANT to know), and it was Fleet’s finest from there, filling the atmosphere with the heady aroma of long-bygone crickets and internally composted mealworms in a bacterial infection sauce.

    Glad it wasn’t with ME, but the ASSISTANT was audibly not lovin’ HER job that day.

    …So, we were returned an aggravated, but relieved, dragon with his wattles all puffed up and black and looking to bite someone, but we took him home without any further trouble.

    All of THAT was just to say THIS,

    …If “Snake Orgy” would be a good band name, then an even BETTER one would be…

    “LIZARD ENEMA”.

    …Now, if some young people would like to go out and become superstars under that name and send me royalties, I’d be much obliged…

    …is “punk” still a thing? Not sure. Oh, well, the kids have to figure out the genres, I can’t do EVERYTHING…

    6

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