(27 Nov 2018) A bear had no trouble opening a door as it strolled into a California Highway Patrol office in a mountain town.
SNIP: I bet he was after the Honey Buns inside one of those vending machines.
19 Comments on Stop Me If You’ve Heard This One- A Bear Walks Into A Police Station…
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Was he a Rabbi or a Priest?….Maybe a pirate ships captain who had the steering wheel attached to his belt and said…..”Aye….and it’s driving me nuts”….
He realized he forgot to bring quarters
That is a rather accomplished bear. I know about a dozen people who have had an ice chest opened by a bear and in every case instead of opening it as it should be opened ripped the hinges off and ruined the cooler as well as ate up all the food it was after.
Damn lucky no one was home or those vending machines would have been all shot full of holes
More polite than your typical “youth”, who would have broken the vending machine and stolen the candy.
Displaced from forest fires?
Well, @willysgoatgruff, actually he was there to visit the 3 bears they were holding for psych evaluation.
…in the first cell, the bear was holding a toy steering wheel, pressing an imaginary gas pedal, and making “vroom, vroom!” sounds. When the visiting bear asked him what he was doing, he said “I’m practicing to drive a police car and be a policeman when I get out of here.”
…the bear moved on to the second cell, where there was another bear. This one was balancing on a stool, holding an imaginary handlebar, and making “ruuum, RUUUM!” sounds. When asked what HE was doing, he replied with, “I’m practicing driving a motorcycle. I’m gonna be a motorcycle CHiP when I get out of here!”
…the bear moved on to the third cell, where yet another bear was carefully balancing cashews on the tip of his penis. When asked about THAT, he replied, “I’m fucking nuts! I’m NEVER getting out of here!”
…(its legit because I said they were bears and CHiPs, see…)
Those ‘smokies’ are getting more realistic.
What the hell would we expect? There ain’t any woods left to shit in.
A Rabbi, a Priest, a prostitute and a monkey walk into a bar. The bartender says, “What is this? A joke?”
A Muslim, a homosexual, and a Communist walk into a bar with a hairy, smelly bear. The bartender says “get out, Barak, and take Michelle with you!”
We had a bear visit a local grocery store. He made his way to the liquor store and they eventually caught him on the beer cooler.
http://archive.jsonline.com/news/wisconsin/64674327.html
He was looking for the bathroom.
He was tired of pooping in the woods.
Uh oh, that cop had a gun drawn, doesn’t he know black bear lives matter!?
Kill the damn bear.
He show’s no fear of human scent. Someday, soon, it will end badly for all involved.
It you let them reproduce unchecked, they over populate. The same thing has happened with the great big fuzzy cats called… Mountain lions.
Since the bear had no trouble opening the door, I’m guessing it wuzn’t an Occational Socialist….
Bear walks into police station…. sees vending machines….
“PEPSI!?!?!”
Bear walks out.
Bear walks in and sez – “It’s a POLICE station – whaddya MEAN there AIN’T no Krispy Kremes in here?!?!” 🙄
Was that a brown stain on the officer’s pants seat?