The awards for improbable research publication were handed out last night and, as usual, there were some pretty interesting topics studied in the last year.
Did you know that all mammals tend to empty their bladders in about 21 seconds, no matter how big or small?
Did you know that you can use math to figure out how a Morrocan emperor managed to father 888 children?
Did you know that researchers let bees sting them in 25 different places on their bodies in order to identify where it hurt most? (hint: the most sensitive were, the nose, upper lip and penis shaft.)
21 seconds
Not after I’ve had a few beers.
The penis shaft hurts when stung by a bee?
Who would have thunk it?
Boy that is money well spent!
Did they have to draw straws to pick the one to let the bee sting him on the pecker?
It’s also hard to imagine that getting stung on the tip of your nose would bother you.
Do not forget that every one of these research projects was funded by taxes. Which makes these awards worse, on the magnitude of a million.
I wonder if the bee sting would affect the bladder emptying time? I’m pretty damn sure it would on me!
No. Gay Barry said the Mooshell was a willing subject.
Better break 20 seconds while pissing a a bee hive!
FUNNY!
21 seconds? Obviously Chris Christy wasn’t part of the study group.
The bee sting might give you a woody.
Also not if a bunch of dudes are behind me waiting to use the urinal.
#StageFright
Since Chris Christy can’t see his dick anymore it would obviously take him longer.
Hmm, OK I’ll give it a try.
Heh!
So, 0bama didn’t receive the IG Nobel preemptively?
one of the best Hollywood Squares questions, posted to George Gobel…….”Can a pea last a thousand years?”…..his response….
“Sometimes if feels that way”……LMAO!
I tried to set the record for longest linear stream off the cliff at Angel Falls in Yosemite
The wind does not play fair with drunkards
The dog was impressed, though.
Is there a study on “How to avoid stubbing your big toe on the fucking coffee table when drunk.”? Should be..
I think we need to study why ear hair wants to start growing rapidly as you get older…
I will volunteer for that study Moe.
Ship cases of tequila to:
LocoBlancoSaltine
One Drunk Bordello
Sarafuckinsota, CrazyassFlorida, 31669
I’ll get back to you with the results.
PS, this study will cost the taxpayers $3.12 million.
What can I say?
Damn you whiskeycart. It looks like a burnt Ball Park Frank.
I don’t think they counted search time.
I wonder how many bees had to die just to find out that it hurts like Hell to be stung on your Willy. Seems like they coulda guessed that one…
My theory is that, over time, gravity pulls down the hair follicles that used to grow out of the top of your scalp, and they start growing out of your ears and nose instead, but I lack the funding to do further research.
😉
Next up, a study of liberals worldwide, and their frequent use of the the word “Doh.”
This mammal took a bit longer…..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=2&v=ETASeNbDqC8
.
A guy walks up and starts using the urinal next to Chris Christy. He casually looks over and says, “You’re a pretty big guy, when was the last time you saw it?” Chris responds, “It’s been a while.” The other guy says, “Maybe you should diet.” and Chris replies, “Dye it? What color is it?”
One of the Ig Nobel winners determined that the term “huh?” is universal across all languages.
Given how many leftist there are everywhere, I bet one could make a study that “doh!” is universal too.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-4-gLlF0uw
I’m a conservative, and I use the term “D’OH!” a lot, mainly to express disbelief at the actions of Libtards. Does that count toward your future study?