via Babylon Bee
15 Comments on 7 Gun-Free Tactics To Defend Your Home
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via Babylon Bee
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One word, flame thrower, ok two.
Don’t underestimate the power of misgendering.
I’ve got a sign on my doors saying “Contents in home donated by rich, vacationing neighbors”.
It’s worked so far.
Amazing how rich politicians are always trying to take our guns away while they always have armed guards a few feet away, that taxpayers pay for 24/7.
Canadian/Liberal Tips for Home Invasion Theft & Property Crime:
— STAY CALM —
1) Make sure the inside of the home is well lit to avoid the “Visitor” tripping or injuring himself.
2) Be polite & use the correct pronouns.
3) IF you have any Firearms, Inform your Guest of their Location, Their safe usage & weather they are better suited for the guest’s purpose that what they may have brought with they/them.
4) Offer up any Family Members for sexual assault.
5) Provide Hydration & Nutritious snacks throughout the ordeal. (fatty foods are known to reduce life expectancy)
6) Be culturally sensitive to any differences they may have. Ie. No Alcohol
7) Ask if they have any food allergies or have any dietary restrictions.
8) Provide Safety Items such as; Eye protection, Gloves, Back support, etc.
9) Be helpful. Some household items can be Heavy & Awkward. Lend a hand & remember to Lift with your legs.
10) WAIT! After the initial incident give your Guests at least 30 minutes to Get Away. This will give you time reflect on what YOU could have done BETTER to have improved Their Experience. Pause will also you time to determine of calling the Police is the CORRECT thing to do as it May be HARMFUL to your new Friends.
SMOKING: Smoking is generally NOT PERMITTED indoors in a Public Space as second hand smoke has been linked to numerous Health Issues. Although in a personal residence it is NOT ILLEGAL, The Various Canadian health agencies recommend that you smoke OUTDOORS at least 10 Meters from a free Doorway or Window.
Kcir
get elected, enjoy taxpayer-funded 24/7 armed protection
195 combined pounds of wolf and pitbull muscle, two sets of vicious canine teeth, eight paws with claws, 2 bad attitudes towards strangers, numerous weapons will full magazines/chambers, blades, bows of all sizes and description, and 34 years of practice using them on a 245 pound frame. Native American attitude about death.
I think I’m good…
^ make the other guys death a ’good death.’
Have some BEAR SPRAY handy just in case they have a bear with them!
An angry beaver is always recommended….
Don’t refer to my girlfriend using that term!
a divorced angry beaver is better. just saying
Sharks with frickin lasers beams on their heads!
Wynonna.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06CKQObhsTk
I would lean more towards this. W.E. Fairbairn teaches you how you should have carried a gun.