Did I Tell You About My New Business? – IOTW Report

Did I Tell You About My New Business?

Friday, 5 August 2016, 19:44 BFH Uncategorized 134

It’s an app for donating directly to the Catholic Church.

It’s called Papal.

No?

Don’t like that one?

How about my idea for a floating Scrabble game where people can play in the tub?

It’s called Scrubble.

No?

Or my gum that never loses its flavor?

Durabubble.

A clothing store for people with horrible credit?

Dee Klein

Okay, you get the idea.

Let’s get to work and blow a million dollar idea right here on this thread.

I’m going to pick a few of my favorites and make the graphic for the idea.

 

133 Comments on Did I Tell You About My New Business?

  27. Just gave birth to your third child?
    Horrible stretch marks ruining your otherwise beautiful midriff?
    My new company can take those stretch marks and turn them into a beautiful picture.

    Try Stretch-a-Sketch!

  47. Ice cream truck fleet that caters to BLM while blasting race jokes on the loud speaker: Hood Humor.

    These trucks will be bullet proof with gun ports plus mini-guns mounted on the roof. You have to pay to work for this company. No paychecks! Ammo ain’t cheap.

  61. True story: When I as working in downtown Manhattan on the 14th floor (which was actually the 13th floor, but I digress). The elevator company’s name was stamped boldly in metal in the threshold. It said “Schindler”. Often when on the elevator I thought to myself, I’m in “Schindler’s Lift”.

  77. The world’s largest department store for shoppers with a tenuous grasp of reality–flagship store is at Herald Square in midtown Manhattan:

    SPACY*S

  89. Dirty minded tonight so crawl to your safe spaces and here’s a trigger warning

    (1)Maternity clothing store called Mother Frockers

    (2)Door knockers in the shape of testicles and penis called Cock Knockers or Door Bangers. Market heavily to the LGBTXYZ crowd.

    (3) some back ground. I do all sorts of needlework. I’ve met quite a few straight males who stitch, knit, quilt to reduce high blood pressure, stress, etc.
    Hence a line of X-rated cross stich designs for both men and women to stich. Instead of being called xs or x-stitch it will be Y Stitch. The ‘Y’, of course, will be formed by a naked woman with her legs spread or a naked man with his legs spread and a coy pose. Throw is some naughty applique quilting, needlepoint, embroidery and there you have it.
    Illustrate that one for me.

    (4) The Lorena Bobbitt brand of toothpaste which, um, comes/cums in a penis shaped tube. The top comes off to squeeze the paste.
    Throw in a complimentary naked man toothbrush.

    That’s it for the moment.

  92. Cracker Barrel – 44 magnum with an 8 inch barrel only available to whites

    Cracker Barrel – heavy duty barrels for BLM to dump the white victims in

    Awful House – home cooking just like mama used to make

  94. Oops forgot this one. A weed whacking tool for angry feminazi’s called a Weenie Whacker.

    Grime and Punishment – a house cleaning service run by dominitrix who beat the tar out of you after cleaning

  98. @Meerkat, nope, married but with a vivid imagination. Sometimes I skeers my husband.

    War and Peas – vegetarian MRE’s for the troops

    Silence of the Hams – honey baked ham shop where you aren’t allowed to speak and the employees are mute or whatever the PC term is these days

    Quoranimals – stuffed camels and goats for the junior jihadis to practice on. Come with detachable heads and suicide packs

  107. Are you a Millennial feeling guilty about not having enough white guilt?
    No worries, you to can become just like Rachal Dolezal or Shaun King with face changer app –

    Fake Like Me

  112. New magazine.

    21>18
    Parenthetically “it’s still a Carry Nation so 2>18 as well, bitch”
    If it weren’t for the second amendment the 21st amendment would still be law.
    A magazine that celebrates Alcohol and Firearms.

  114. Sick of annoying, arrogant cyclists hogging the road?
    Take them out with your choice of vehicle and cyclists turn into “no bicycle” icons in game app,

    Re-Cycled or XdCycle

  115. @Meerkat, I don’t believe I’ve ever read a King novel. In the ’70’s I read Thomas Tryon and Shirley Jackson and got my fill of having the bejesus scared out of me.

  117. IOTWR – I Offed The World Report, blogging the madcap adventures of the world’s most prolific serial killers and their devotees.
    Big Fur Hat who smothers his victims under said hat.
    Mary Jane Anklestraps who garrotes her victims with the anklestraps.
    Clawdia with her 3 inch long cat nails slashes her victims to ribbons.
    Mr. Pinko who shoves watermelon down his victims throats ’til they choke.
    Irony Curtain who tells his victims ‘it’s curtains for you bub’ before dispatching with an old steam iron.
    Illustr8tor has uses for those oversized sharpened pencils.
    Aurelius philosophizes people to death. It’s a long slow death.

  127. A .45 cal suppository for getting rid of Muslims who are a real pain in the ass:
    Preparation M.

    Government program that will fund racial reparations:
    US Slaving Bonds

    Organization that assists dwarves who suffer from male erectile dysfunction:
    MicroLimp

    Country where everyone has a hard time getting out of bed for work:
    Late Britain

    Medication for people with really serious constipation:
    Grand Coulee Dambusters

    Prostitutes made from wood:
    Pinocchoes

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