College Stu-dunce Says “Pockets” Are Sexist – IOTW Report

College Stu-dunce Says “Pockets” Are Sexist

Is there a contest to see who can come up with the dumbest gripe? Because this fecal gherkin is in the lead.

College Fix-

If you thought society’s fashion-related discrimination against women ended with fat-shaming Miss Universe or refusing to make trendy clothing for the average American woman, you haven’t been looking hard enough.

Specifically at your hips, butt and possibly chest and upper thighs – if you’re a man.

“Pockets are sexist towards women,” and fashion designers must “adapt and evolve to fit the needs of the modern working women,” columnist Eric Schucht writes in the University of Oregon’s Daily Emerald.

Enlightened male-identifying person that he is, Schucht unveils the 400-year-old conspiracy to deny women the privileges of men and make them rely on men (like Schucht) to carry their personal items:

It’s quite amazing how many pockets guys have at their disposal. From shirt pockets, sweatpants pockets, to even kilt pockets, clothing is stacked in our favor. Not only do men have numerous pockets, but they’re also huge. I’ve been able to hang onto to three phones, two wallets, and a pair of keys in just my jeans pockets alone. Why shouldn’t women receive the same luxury?

Because the fashion industry designed women’s pockets “for style,” not functionality, women were forced to buy handbags. It’s another Big Business racket!

Sadly, it makes sense why the fashion industry doesn’t include practical pockets in their designs.  It’s cheaper to make those favorite pair of skinny jeans of yours without pockets. Your loss is their gain. Furthermore, with the loss of all those pockets, those same companies now have an ideal market to sell their bags and purses to.

Women also face hand discrimination!

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34 Comments on College Stu-dunce Says “Pockets” Are Sexist

  1. “I’ve been able to hang onto to three phones, two wallets, and a pair of keys in just my jeans pockets alone.”

    was this guy a pickpocket?
    3 phones and 2 wallets?

    what am I missing here?
    why 3 phones and 2 wallets?
    why do you need more than one of each?

  2. Of course, you know what the Progressive solution will be. That’s right: Ban all pockets, especially the high-capacity ones. No one should need that much carry power!

    Well, they can have mine when they cut them from my cold, dead Levis.

  3. Screw that! I don’t buy pants or shorts unless they have pockets. I wear cargo shorts when I walk – 5 miles every day. Gotta have a place for my phone, keys and a radio. Armstrong and Getty talked about this on their radio show the other morning. Bored me to to death so I turned them off.

  4. Well this is definitely a runner up in the dumbest gripe olympics but the gold medal this year still belongs to the woman who thinks science is sexist because it’s based on facts and reality and not feelings.

  5. Pockets? Heck, I went to my 50th High School Reunion last week and we all had name tags – and I spent the evening explaining to many of the women: “No, I’m not staring at your chest, I’m looking at your name tag to figure out who you are. Hell, girl, you’re 68 years old – if I was staring at your chest I would be looking a lot lower.

  6. Uh,….there is nothing stopping women from buying men’s pants. It works for the lesbians. I prefer not to have big old bulky pockets junking up my silhouette. Besides, what woman wouldn’t rather carry her things in a fabulous handbag?

  7. Am I right? OCTOBER 3, 2016 AT 9:03 AM
    Bra’s are the worst sexist thing there is. Girls in college should take them off now”
    Bra’s are also a fraud. How many times have you removed one just to find what’s inside didn’t match the profile?

  8. “Besides, what woman wouldn’t rather carry her things in a fabulous handbag?”

    This woman. Wallet and phone in one pocket, keys in another. I quit with the purse thing decades ago, due to a jacked up shoulder and neck.

  9. I have pockets I don’t use … the hens are welcome to them.

    There may be some change in the front pocket … just reach in there and grab some … a little further … kinda feel around …

    izlamo delenda est …

  10. You have all missed the POINT. All clothes carry some appropriated cultural elements. Therefore young females should show their awareness and sensitivity by not wearing any(but only certain types of female,i.e.,cute and curvey) WOMEN Of The WORLD ,SHED YOURSELVES OF THIS MALE FASHION CONSPIRACY!! SHED YOUR CLOTHES!!!

  11. I like watching you in yoga pants, you like me watching you in yoga pants, so you go out in public in yoga pants. If you weren’t trying to get looks you would have LARGE pockets

  12. as a person of the female persuasion, i have to admit that pockets are indeed sexist…….it is for this reason that i only wear men’s jeans…..”wymin” pockets are about five inches across, and three inches deep…”man” pockets are more like six inches across, and at least nine inches deep….

    when i need to SCRATCH AN ITCH, wymin pockets just don’t work…..

    wait…what’s that?….i’m not supposed to SCRATCH when it ITCHES?……on account of i’m a daintly little flower?……

    this is, actually, most likely too much information……but all the same, pockets ARE sexist…….just not for the reasons mentioned in this article……

    and it may have just a weebit to do with wearing hand-me-downs from three brothers, and NO sisters…….

    …………….. 🙂

  13. also – to leggo my eggo…..

    whilst wandering around walmart, i’m often tempted to imagine what a pubescent young man might be thinking, when he chances upon the female “underwear” department….

    and what i always come up with is….”OMG, THEY ARE ALL FAKE!!!”

    as a female who prefers not to wear body armor instead of normal undergarments, i am extremely aggravated at the scarcity of “unenhanced” udderwear…….

    and there you have it……

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