According to authorities 18 year-old man is “traumatized” by sex with 22 year-old woman – IOTW Report

According to authorities 18 year-old man is “traumatized” by sex with 22 year-old woman

Tuesday, 6 February 2018, 13:15 BFH Uncategorized 73

You know how protective child services can get out of hand and overstep their authority? So can every other authority agency, and this story is preposterous.

See this woman. She had a student-teaching assignment at a high school. It completed with no event. The high school kept her on salary as an assistant track coach.

An 18 year-old guy, who was a student, asked for her phone number.

She made the mistake of giving it to the guy, in that when you work for a high school, no matter what your age, it is not appropriate to get involved with a student, no matter what their age is, or so goes conventional wisdom.

The girl said she loved the guy, and the guy was upset with the investigation, concerned for the girl and what could happen to her.

She’s been charged with 3 counts of “sexual assault.”

This is friggin ridiculous.

Should she lose her job? That’s for the school to decide, and they’d be within their rights to terminate her.

Should she be charged with sexual assault??

How could she be?

What is going on?

story

73 Comments on According to authorities 18 year-old man is “traumatized” by sex with 22 year-old woman

  9. She’s a teacher and as such is in a position of implied authority and while I’m sure the boy figured he had hit the jackpot, turn the story around a bit and have a 22 year old male school teacher with an 18 year old female student. There wouldn’t be any sympathy for the man. Implied authority rules that are in most states and provinces are there to protect young people from becoming targets of predators. By the by I’m not sure but I believe it still applies to firms like McDonalds, Walmart, Wendy’s etc etc. I have no sympathy for the woman as she had been trained to know that her actions were wrong. If she really was in love with the boy she should have quit her job and then persued the relationship.

  10. the only way the 18 year old was traumatized by this 22 year old teacher was if she had a dick.

    come on.

    I would bet the rest of the male class was masturbating while thinking about having sex with her.

  13. scr_north — Adding to my agreement with your comment, these situations also help normalize — “It’s no big deal!” — abnormal relationships between students and teachers/staff in public schools. Just because the student was of legal age shouldn’t cause us to expect that teachers/staff see them as fair game.

  14. Assistant track coach? I’m betting the science’s or mathematics is lost on this one. Those than can do, those that can’t teach, those that can’t do either tech gym/how to run and screw their students.

  16. Oh come on. She was 22 and he was 18. The fact that she is being criminally charged but her job not threatened tells me there was nothing on her contract to prevent hooking up with someone of legal age. If you don’t think this sort of thing was taking place when we were all young and pretty you’re mistaken. You just hear about it now days.

  17. She’s dumb as a box of rocks. but a rapist? No.
    18 & 22 year olds schtupping isn’t illegal in any state.
    Working in a place that forbids dating your of-age students or co-workers is cause for firing, not jail time. I don’t understand the pearl-clutching of the police.

  18. This is not “normalizing” abnormal behavior. What the hell is abnormal about an 18 year-old and a 22 year-old having sex?
    Of course the ages matter here.

    You’re overreacting to ethics clauses in the workplace.
    If she worked at Target and Target had a no fraternizing with the customers clause, she could be fired, but to say she is participating in “abnormal” behavior is ludicrous.

    I think we have intelligence and judgment enough to be able to look at these things on a case by case basis and have the ability to not put a scarlet A on this girl, casting her as abnormal.

  20. “Working in a place that forbids dating your of-age students or co-workers is cause for firing”

    Well I can’t imagine that’s not in the her contract, but then why isn’t the school terminating her?

  21. After serious thought, Lazlo will volunteer to see just how much trauma she inflicted on the poor lad.
    Without a comparison, any rush to judgement is reckless and without merit.
    Now if I should perish during this endeavor, let them know that I faced my end like a man

  23. The Connecticut criminal statute under which Boncal is charged forbids any and all sexual contact between teachers and students in schools in the state.>>>>

    Ridiculous law once the two people involved are of age.
    I hope it goes to the Supreme Court.

    Yes they can fire her for violating an ethics clause… but not a moral one.

  26. As a conservative, I am appalled that the state of Connecticut thinks they have the right to intercede into the affairs of adults, implying that they know better and are acting on adults’ behalf even when the two of them consent to the relationship.
    They claim it’s to protect people who are subservient to people who have disciplinary or supervisory charge over them.

    OHHHHhhhhh thank you Connecticut. Can you step in and protect me from trying to date the 22 year-old manager of my department at Walmart when I’m 18?

    What’s with the state treating adults as if they are retarded? What’s with conservatives agreeing to this?

    Logically, once the person becomes legal age, Connecticut’s policy shouldn’t stop at 18.
    Why aren’t they stepping in when a teacher who is 35 has sex with the principal who is 45?
    It’s a relationship that could be tainted by the principal’s position of authority over the teacher.

    Bill is lucky the white house wasn’t in Connecticut.

  32. Fur Hat: “This is not “normalizing” abnormal behavior. What the hell is abnormal about an 18 year-old and a 22 year-old having sex?
    Of course the ages matter here.

    You’re overreacting to ethics clauses in the workplace.”

    Take away the setting, and we’re all just fine. He was of legal age, she was of legal age.

    But this is not a “work place” for the teenager. It *is* her work place. Apparently, in more ways than one.

    Can’t compare it with a work place. A public school isn’t Target or Amazon. Parents send their children to school with the reasonable expectation that the “adult” school staff will not exploit their young son’s hormones. You’re helping to normalize this exploitation by comparing a public school to any other work place.

    The Trash Heap Has Spoken, Meyyyyyeh!
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vNdl9NpCMOA

    🙂

    ….

  34. “Don’t get caught in the jaws of ‘justice’.”

    This is bullshit. Like the guy in Portugal who was burned at the stake for eating chicken after peeling the fat off.

    “… tell me where is sanity?”

    izlamo delenda est …

  35. Distilling it down: It’s just bad public policy and bad for society to remove the social taboo of school teachers or school staff having sexual relationships with their students. Though the participants may be of legal age and even if it is consensual, it’s bad thing to introduce into the school culture. I don’t feel sorry for the teacher involved. She knew better but acted selfishly.

  36. Of course this is Connecticut’s business as well as the business of every other person in Connecticut. And while the state’s at it, we need to see if the gal watched any television show starring Tim Allen in the last five years. And the dude didn’t double tie his shoes in gym class – that’s at least a citable infraction. And last night’s ravioli was overcooked – a border line felony if I ever saw one. Was his track uniform washed before the last meet? Throw the book at him.

    This is what happens when people say “there ought to be a law” against this, that or the other. For one, there probably already is a law covering such offenses – if the guy was under 18, this could be statutory rape – and the state didn’t really need another one. Further, the more laws states pass, the less discretion anyone has to take individual considerations into account because one or 10,000 crimes fits all.

    The female was just an assistant track coach; it’s not like she had any real authority and she was dealing with high testosterone high school males. Particularly in track, we had a lot of assistant track coaches who just told you to run faster or jump higher – duh. A lapse in judgment and the girl should lose the gig, but it’s not a crime.

  39. Shouldn’t be a crime, but fireable lack of integrity. She needs to find another way to make a living.

    What’s more interesting is how often this happens now. Has feminism turned out millions of stupid skanks who can only handle heterosexuality with adolescent men that they can totally control?

  40. 18 year-olds being called children is the problem.
    The picture of the soldiers storming the beach in Normandy contain hundreds of 18 year-olds.

    If they are children I’d rather the state protect them from that situation than when they are storming the britches of Norma.

    You’re confusing an ethical violation with a moral one.
    There is no moral violation here. The state says it’s an issue of power. Power situations extend past the age of 18, so why does it just somehow begin and end in a school setting?

    What the hell is so sacrosanct about the teacher student relationship when people are 18?

  41. Should sex between consenting adults be subject to the strictures of the State?
    Perhaps the State should regulate all sex between (among) all consenting adults?
    What is the State’s interest? As AbigailAdams sees it, there is the question of the morality vis-a-vis the public school system and the resultant diminution or exploitation of the authority by the teacher. There is also the chance of jealousy and rage by the other 18 y/o men who cannot avail themselves of a similar predicament – thereby causing a general breakdown of society.
    Mr. Hat sees this as an issue of consenting adults within the school “sphere,” so to speak, and thus outside the purview of the State though the public school is a construct of that State.
    The teacher suffered a “momentary lapse of reason” and the implications for society aren’t grave. Perhaps every teacher in the State should be admonished to “keep her knickers up” and to meet her paramour at the local bar after hours?

    There’s no victim. Every crime must needs have a victim (even “victim-less” crimes have victims – they are hidden from view being multitudinous or each suffered insignificantly) and I don’t see how the majesty of the law is besmirched by this.

    The entire affair could have been handled by a quiet talk.

    izlamo delenda est …

  42. Mr. Hat sees this as an issue of consenting adults within the school “sphere,” so to speak, and thus outside the purview of the State though the public school is a construct of that State.>>

    No, I see this outside the sphere of judging ones morality.
    Ethics? Fine. No argument.
    The charge is sexual assault.
    The charge is asinine.
    The statute cites that they are protecting adults from an authoritative/subservient dynamic… but only in schools.
    WHY?
    Are 18 year-olds in schools retards, but an 18 year-old working at the DMV and banging his 22 year-old boss is okay?

    Explain this.

  43. Has feminism turned out millions of stupid skanks who can only handle heterosexuality with adolescent men that they can totally control?>>>

    That’s what Gavin said… except the part about the adolescent.
    Who’s the adolescent in this particular story?

  46. Fur, While a lot of 18 year-olds in school (or otherwise) are, in fact, retards, that’s really not the point.

    “The statute cites that they are protecting adults from a authoritative/subservient dynamic… but only in schools.
    WHY?”

    High school should be about grades, sports, figuring out what you want to be/do with your adult life, learning how to navigate your own emotional life in all kinds of situations and finding out what works and what doesn’t. Even if the woman was only a few years older than the student, she — and others like her — are putting themselves into that student’s life in a way they shouldn’t be.

    The guy is 18 years old. If he’s still in high school, the chances are greater that he’s closer to 17 than 19. From a developmental standpoint, he’s a lot closer to adolescence than a 22 year old woman.

    Would you feel differently about this if the teacher was male and the student female? I ask because there’s always this stupid high fiving going on and comments about wishing to have been “abused” by a hot teacher back in the day. As a mother I would be very pissed off if my son was in this situation, no matter how adult/mature he may be for his age.

  47. …and Fur, you misinterpreted what I wrote. I didn’t say “abnormal behavior”, I wrote “abnormal relationships.”

    All she had to do was wait ’til he graduated. But then he would be out in the big, wide world and not an easy sexual fix for Ms. Hawteacher. I wonder which junior she had her sights set on for the coming school year.

  48. It was an inappropriate relationship but not criminal. I was 22yo once, thought I was all grown up, but only very slightly less likely to do something as stupid as when I was 18yo. Being young, horny, and not yet as mature as you should be is a universal milestone.

    My son will turn 22 next month. I know he’s doing somethings I’d rather he didn’t, believing them poor choices, but they’re unwise not unlawful. Fortunately he’s living in another state so I’m not aware of his other choices I wouldn’t approve of. Hopefully none of them ruins his life or takes it, and like most people he becomes a little wiser, more mature & more self controlled every year.

  52. Not knowing anything about the law other than what was in the article, it would seem to prohibit any romantic relationship between student and teacher in ANY school in the state. How about college? How about a 30 year old college student and a professor? What if the student is not in any of the professor’s classes? There has to be room for judgement. The 18 year old ADULT was not a student of the ADULT teacher-in-training, nor was he on the track team. She was not an employee of the school, but (i believe) an un-paid intern. All the sexual escapades took place off-campus, after hours. This is a non-issue. Maybe she should lose her job (if she ever had one), but if she is charged criminally, it would never pass constitutional challenge.

  53. At 22 years young, labeling her as a sexual predator is Fing Nuts and an injustice. A hard lesson for her to learn. And that lesson is don’t date people from where you work. There’s a lot more crude description of that lesson that I won’t use.

  54. “don’t date people from where you work”

    Had a guy working for me and I suggested that he respect that dynamic. When the inevitable happened and the two couldn’t be scheduled together… I really didn’t have a lot of sympathy.

  59. @AA, “The guy is 18 years old. If he’s still in high school, the chances are greater that he’s closer to 17 than 19.”

    That doesn’t compute. If you are 1 second into your 18th birthday, you are closer to 19 than 17 by rule of math, something they used to teach in high school. And, yes, he is “closer” to adolescence than a 22 year old. However, when referring to being closer to adolescence you are suggesting a new life. Once you leave adolescence, you cease to ever become closer to it.

    The bikini photo is legit. I spent actual free time tracking it down.

  61. “Age of consent in Connecticut
    In Connecticut, the age of consent to engage in sexual activity is 16 years old. However, if the defendant holds a position of authority over the victim, such as a coach or teacher, then the age of consent rises to 18 years or older. Like many states, the law only applies if there is a certain minimum age difference between the parties.”
    Hmmm, go away for a few minutes….
    BFH,Bad_Brad you may not like the law but it is the law and that’s why she’s being charged. As I mentioned earlier if this had been a 22 year old male having sex with an 18 year old student there would be hell to pay but it would seem that if the victim is a boy then laying criminal charges is nuts. Note that she wasn’t just a teacher in the school the kid was a student in one of the social classes she taught. I was suprised the flippancy with which the auther at the Dailer Caller wrote about this story. Her crime may not have risen to the level of axe murder but it needs to be treated by the media with some sense seriousness especially as it relates to the schools where a lot of todays problems started with liberal atitudes being brought into the class (and elsewhere).

  62. ” as it relates to the schools where a lot of todays problems started with liberal atitudes being brought into the class (and elsewhere).”

    But the thing is this kind of thing has been going on forever. Her punishment in this case does not fit the crime. If she were 10 years older yes I could see it. But ruining the life of a 22 year old for being stupid is not right. Being branded a Sexual Predator at age 22 for her part in this is unjust.

  63. So if it were a 32 year old and an 18 year old the punishment would fit the crime. Okay, why don’t we make legal consent between adults illegal if their age spans 14 years or more?

  64. And on top of that we have Bill and Hillary, Comey, Koskinen, Lerner, Lynch, Holder, Jarrett, Abedin, etc. etc. running around still free and not facing life changing charges. I think this 22 year old girl is facing more than she deserves in this.

  65. eternal cracker p
    ” If she were 10 years older yes I could see it.”

    Don’t cherry pick. If it were a 32 year old guy banging your 18 year old daughter in a school environment I’m pretty sure you would take issue. And I get what scr_north is saying. I have an issue with screwing somebody that youngs life up. Particularly when the only thing on their minds was

    https://youtu.be/mIjZE4kcg_Q

  66. @BB, How am I cherry picking anything? We’re talking about 2 consenting adults. I’m sorry if your daughter ran off without your permission, but I fail to see how that applies here.

  68. I married 45 days after turning 18.
    My wife was (is) 18 days older than I.
    Horror of horrors!
    (no, she wasn’t a school official, but she did sing in the choir)

    That was in 1971.
    I hope they live long and prosper.

    izlamo delenda est …

  69. Back in the early 80’s when I was in prison, er public high school, I was aware of: a male coach banging a cheerleader, a female math teacher doping with and banging my friend(s) (bastards!) and a violent lesbian math teacher getting in bar fights coming to class with black eyes, a broken hand, broken arm I mean really fucked up. Then there was the faygela English teacher I’m pretty sure never molested anyone but boy was he a-flamin’.

    I never said a word.

    My only goal was to get the hell out of there without being maimed or killed.

    They say government schools have gotten worse.

    I imagine if said saucy wench wanted to help me wax my javelin while I dodged black gangs, inbred hillbillies with belt knives and assistant principals that beat the shit out of students with impunity just to mark time and make it out of there, it would have been okay with me.

  70. Ow My Balls

    I had an assistant wrestling coach that was a NCAA champion. A very handsome guy. Was a dead ringer for Robert Conrad back in the day. That guy screwed more 18 year old seniors than the rest of the senior male student body combined. Word got out. They shipped his ass up to Oregon where he continued his bad habits. He eventually had to quit teaching. I met him at my Father in laws funeral, the head coach of my high school, he wouldn’t even acknowledge me.

  72. 1. Ask for charges to be thrown out of court.
    2. Never accept a plea deal for any of this.
    3. If convicted, appeal, appeal, appeal.

    Even if you WIN, you have to fill out a resume asking if you have EVER been charged with ANYTHING, even if the charges were later dismissed.

    Sick society. Thanks for helping to ruin a life stupid cops and courts.

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