No longer will the streets of fair Berkeley be dotted with manholes, nary a womanhole or nonbinaryhole in sight. With Tuesday night’s vote, they have all been transmuted into “maintenance holes,” that highest, hardest glass manhole-cover finally shattered.
The item, originally on the council agenda for March 12, was sponsored by councilmembers Rigel Robinson, Cheryl Davila, Ben Bartlett and Lori Droste, reports Berkeleyside. The ordinance eliminates all gendered pronouns from the city code, replacing “she” and “he” with “they.”
Here is a table outlining Berkeley’s Gender Neutral Ordinances-
When King County, Wash. enacted a similar measure last year, some on Twitter were left wistful for the halcyon days when manholes were manholes; Many others were indifferent.
“I gotta say as a female engineer in Seattle,” one woman wrote, “I really don’t give a crap what you call a utility access point.”
ht/ petrus
Why not call them “buttholes”? That would be gender neutral.
I was going to call up my mom & tell her about the new thinkspeak, but I don’t know what to call her now
“Good morning, my parental unit”?
How about aholes? THEY seem to have so many.
Do these freaks scour a dictionary to discover new ways to be offended?
One cannot give you an offense you must take it.
Grow up Nancy!
I don’t like holes, can we call them sphincters? work sphincters?
…And here I thought that “Manhole” was Newspeak for the front hole formed by an unethical, immoral “doctor” after he mutilates a mentally-ill man so he can go irrevocably, physically into the delusion he can EVER be a woman, which he can’t, hence the high suicide rate…
Those are called BackHoles now Billy!
When I, oops, WE were awaiting the birth of our daught, oops, human being, we decided to put off naming he, oops, IT.
On the other hand, middleman and hatchet man will remain unchanged.
Thankfully the government bureaucrats are taking care of these important issues.
Call them street anuses NOW!
And from now on city counsel members will be called assholes.
Avenue Anus
Road Rectum
Thoroughfare turdtunnel
Boulevard Bunghole
Just trying to help them out.
Field Utility/Construction Hole, obviously.
Elevator [noun]: Cage or unfenced platform that is raised and lowered in a vertical shaft to move from floor to floor.
Oh Oh – Cages and Fences
Sewer- Stinkhole
Electrical- Shockhole
Storm Sewer- Floodhole
Telecom- Babelhole
Transit- Rumblehole
What’d I miss?
Why not Big Mikes?
Utility Access Hole, or U-A-Hole for short.
male and female as “people of different genders” ??
Tell me if this makes sense:
A people of different genders married a people of different genders and they are expecting a people of different genders baby that will be delivered by a people of different genders doctor who has a people of different genders nurse assistant.
Walter Payton was a hunters for the Chicago Bears.
The language no longer conveys meaning.
Sportsmen are now hunters? 😄
ecp
JULY 18, 2019 AT 1:08 PM
“…The language no longer conveys meaning.”
…EXACTLY as the Left INTENDED…
@Anonymous, it says sportsmAn is hunterS. It’s important to fuck up pluralalites while they’re at it. I imagine sportsmEn might be huntersers.
Why not just pave them over and this important would fade away? No need for sewers, take a hint from San Francisco and shit in the street. It’s the progressive thing to do.
All of their sewers are called sidewalks now.
Name ’em after the city – SHITHOLES! 😳
@ Lowell: Only “councilmembers” = assholes
Hey, that’s not fair as maintenance has a numbers favoritism problem! Why not mainsixence or mainfourence, etc?
All of the Manhole Covers in the Florida Keys are made by “OK” Steel
out of Wisconsin I believe…They even have the OK White Power hand
Symbol on them….TRIGGGGGGGGGGEEERRRRRREEED !!!!
Feminist Assholes. No, that’s the new name for the manholes.
What happened to Frontholes? Wasn’t that a thing for 5 hot minutes?
Here’s the problem. The Hep generation has the attention span of an amoeba, they can’t keep up with their own moving targets. So I’ll just stay old school and call them a**holes to their face. I have a feeling they’ll know what I mean.