Baptizing an Irishman – IOTW Report

Baptizing an Irishman

An Irishman is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river.

He proceeds into the water, subsequently bumping into the preacher. The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol, whereupon, he
asks the drunk, “Are you ready to find Jesus?” The drunk shouts, “Yes, I am.”

So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water. He pulls him back and asks, “Brother, have you found Jesus?” The drunk replies,”No, I haven’t found Jesus!” The preacher, shocked at the answer, dunks him again but for a little longer. He again pulls him out of the water and asks, “Have you found Jesus, brother?” The drunk answers,
“No, I haven’t found Jesus!”

By this time, the preacher is at his wits end and dunks the drunk again — but this time holds him down for about 30 seconds, and when he begins kicking his arms and legs about, he pulls him up.

The preacher again asks the drunk, “For the love of God, have you found Jesus?”

The drunk staggers upright, wipes his eyes, coughs up a bit of water, catches his breath, and says to the preacher,

“Are you sure this is where he fell in?”

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h/t MLM

15 Comments on Baptizing an Irishman

  1. LOL

    And I am a born-again Christian. There’s humor, and then, there’s mocking God–a difference. Someone once said if you thing God doesn’t have a sense of humor, consider the humming bird.

  2. I just got back from listening to Mark Levin. So yer on to Irish jokes?

    An Irishman walking through his field saw a stranger drinking water from a stream with his hand.

    Pat shouted at the man: “Nan bouche uische dan shat bo.”

    (Don’t drink the water it’s full of cow shit).

    The man yelled back, “I don’t understand you, I’m English, please speak English.”

    Pat said. “Use both hands, you’ll get more.”

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