You’re competing for a Keith Memorial Safety Whistle courtesy of Menderman.
Here’s the idea. And it’s childish, and may disqualify us all for running for president one day.
Take one line of a famous song, and then follow it with a second line, altered a bit. The idea is to make it a song about Michelle Obama.
ie: -There’s a Sasquatch on the right…. ( Bad Moon Rising – CCR)
Scuse’ me while I eat this pie… (Purple Haze – Jimi Hendrix)
Something in the way she moos. Attracts me like no other blubber. (Something – Beatles)
It’s just Michelle under your bed, Obama’s in the closet, gives you head. (Enter Sandman – Metallica)
Contest ends at midnight tonight.
I spun the wheel of judges and it landed on…. CLAUDIA.
Michelle, my belle,
She’s a turd and can go straight to hell……
Feeding hours are 9 to 5
but if she shows up at ten past 6 then I
already know that she’ll find someway to sneak food in and oh…
(Not the doctor by Alannis Morrisette)
I’m Feeling, GLADD all over, yes I’m, a GLAAD all over.. (Glad all over – Dave Clark Five)
I live my life like there’s no tomorrow
And all I’ve got I had to steal
Least I don’t need to beg or borrow
Yes, I’m living with a face that kills
(running with the devil- van halen)
She’s in drag.
Papa’s got a brand new bag.
(James Brown)
Pick up the Reese’s.
Did you know you ate my hero?…..
You are the wind between my cheeks. (Wind beneath my wings – Bette Midler)
You Blight Up My Life
Thinkin of you’s working up my appetite
Lookin’ forward to a little Afternoon Delight
Rubbin’ spices all together make the pan ignite
And the thought of eating chicken’s getting so exciting
(afternoon delight- starlight vocal band)
I’ve seen Fire and I’ve seen Rain
And I’ll never stand beneath Michelle again
(that James Taylor guy)
Back in Black
I hit the sack
My dicks so long I tuck it in back.
Yes, let it loose
Like a moose
Don’t sit next to the apple pie with anyone else but me
” In a glob of Velveeta, honey”.
In-A-Godda Da Vida – Iron Butterfly
Play that Chunky Music
Something in the way she moos…..
The Beatles
Killing Me Softly With Her Thong
“Dude looks like a tranny…”
Crap, cancel that BFH said it first ^^^ lol
Heaven, I’m in heaven
And my heart beats so that I can hardly speak
And I seem to find the happiness I seek
When in ’17 you’re thrown out on your cheek
All last night sat on the levee and moaned
Thinkin’ about Moochel and my unhappy home
Going, going to Chicago… (LZ- When the Levee Breaks)
I’m about to break some candy off
Going to lose my mind
I’m about to break some candy off
I feel I’m feeling fine
“If ever I’m in toned arms again
This time I’ll bring you some batter…”
start spreading the news,
the beard will be outa the house in 302 days.
chairman of the board
Eat it! Eat it! Put it on your plate & eat it!
Have a banana, have a whole bunch
It doesn’t matter if you have lunch
Just eat it….eat it….eat it….eat it
Weird Al’s already got this covered
Money for nothin’ and chips for free.
Dire Straits
“Big bottom…big bottom…talk about bun cakes old Moose got em
Big bottom drive Barr out of his mind – how can he leave this behind…”
Black Dog…Led Zeppelin
All I ask for when I pray, big legged woman gonna come my way.
Need a woman gonna hold my hand, big old thighs, make me a happy man.
Wish we could turn back time, to the good ol’ days,
Before Michelle was the first wookie, but now we’re stressed out.
(21 Pilots – Stressed Out)
“They do respect her butt…
They love to watch her mutt.”
Big man, pig man, ha ha charade you are.
You well heeled big moose, ha ha charade you are.
Pigs (Three Different Ones) Pink Floyd
Where the pies are, some pie waits for me
My smilin’ face, my warm embrace, two arms to hold pie tenderly
Where the pies are, my true love will be
I’m walkin’ down the steps of Air Force One and I know pie’s there for me
And I’m giving you a weighty look
Everyday, everyday, everyday you eat the book
Chapter One we didn’t really get it wrong
Chapter Two I think I fell in front of you
You said you wouldn’t stand on me in the middle of Chapter Three
But you were up to your old bolsheviks in Chapters Four, Five and Six
“Show me how you do that bolshevik
The one that makes me scream” she said
“The one that makes me laugh” she said
And threw her arms around my neck
“Show me how you do it
And I promise you I promise that
I’ll run away from you
I’ll run away from you”
“And she’s bad bad Michee Brown
Maddest guy in the whole damn town
Madder than old King Kong
Meaner than a junkyard dog.”
Michael, row the boat ashore, hallelujah.
Michelle’s what they call him when he’s in drag, and he’ll screw ya.
( – “Michael, Row The Boat Ashore”, The Highwaymen)
A cube a, a steak a,
oh I want a cake a,
Gouda in the sauna, there’ll be no drama
Beach Boys Kokomo
Walks like a Sasquatch, talks like a Bull Moose
and has thunder thighs…
But she’s the Devil in Disguise, oh yes she is,
The Devil in Disguise
Moochelle’s Tango lesson in Buenos Aires
Walking the dog
Just a walking the dog
If you don’t know how to do it
I’ll show you how to walk the dog
Come on now, come on, come on
I asked her mother for fifteen cents
To see the elephant jump the fence….
I, I will be queen
And you, you will be queen
Bowie – Heroes
I met a gin soaked, bar-room queen in Chicago,
She tried to take me upstairs for a ride.
She had to heave me right across her shoulder
‘Cause I just can’t seem to drink Mooch off my mind.
(Honky Tonk Woman)
“No one knows what it’s like to be the fat ass
To live in largesse…behind black eyes.”
Round, round, round, her ass is big & round
Round, round, wheeee hooo, her ass is big & round
It’s big & round, round, round, round, round
Her ass is big & round, round as the town
Round, round, round, round, her ass is big & round
(Beach Boys ~ I Get Around)
She’s the cunt in this country, or maybe that her husband.
Pfft! Moo Was Gone. — Archie Campbell
https://youtu.be/WJZY__j0Tyk?t=35s
.
“Can I have this schvantz
For the rest of my life?”
Barry singing
Sitting like a snarky bitch
Eyeing up the world with bad intent
Aqualung
Got a chip on my shoulder that’s bigger than my feet
All I wanna do is eat & eat
If I could get my way
I’d lock all the Whiteys up today
But I can’t so I’ll eat pie instead
(The Beatles ~ I’ll Cry Instead)
Pfft! Moo Was Gone. — Archie Campbell
https://youtu.be/NFLkqJL-bsc
I wear scorn, everywhere I have to go,
Howlin’ at the service, because it’s not like Spain,
For now, it’ll do, because I’ve got gas,
I SAID, it’ll do, it’s just gas,
She’s doesn’t jump because she’s got gas, gas, gas.
Forgive me Rolling Stones.
Back is black…a gunny sack
Yes I’m let loose…from the Moose…”
Sorry. .
Well I’m shameless when it comes to blaming you
I won’t do a damn thing you want me to
Shameless
Garth Brooks
“If I brought a fag along…if I brought a long fag along
If I brought a long fag along…and if you like Moose you can tag along
Be be bop Moose a lot…Moose a lot Moose a lot.”
Blame it all on my roots, I pissed on your boots
And ruined your black nappy hair
Friends In Low Places
Garth Brooks
Helpless people on a subway train
Scream bug-eyed as she looks in on them
She picks up a bus and She throws it back down
As She wades through the buildings toward the center of town
Oh no, they say she’s got to go go go Mo-zilla
(BOC-Godzilla)
Listen to me now as I announce myself,
Mooching off others’ wealth as I waste
Sympathy For The Devil
When Michelle has her eye on a big pizza pie thats a glutton.. When her ass seems as big as an oversized pig thats a glutton. When a cake makes you drool like an overweight fool thats a glutton.
He can see queerly now that his balls are gone,
I grab from all the buffet tables on my way,
(Johnny Nash – I can see clearly now)
On a dark desert highway
Cool wind in my hair
Fart smell from her colon
Rising up through the air
Hotel California
Close to the Edge,
I’m taking over…
Yes: Close to the Edge
I want nothing but a Hot Dog
With mustard on the side
I want a couple dozen Hot Dogs
With mustard on the side
You ain’t never loved my Barry
‘Cause you’re always eatin’ my French Fries
You said you liked my big ass
Well, that was just a lie
You said you liked my big ass
That was just a lie
You always wanted Reggie
And you always zippin’ down his fly
(Big Moma Thorton, aka Elvis Presley)
Hey I was just a skinny lad
Never knew no good from bad
Left alone with that big fat Fanny
She was such a naughty Tranny
Heap big Michelle, you made a bad boy out of me
(Fat Bottom Girls)
“Super calorie fragile fish sticks she got halitosis
When it comes out that fat ass it’s something quite atrocious.”
Got To Get you Out Of My Life.
Revolver
Hey, Big Mama Thornton and Elvis were two different people.
https://youtu.be/yoHDrzw-RPg
.
Song for January 2017
“It’s over now, so take your big black cow,
and get outta here!”
A Taste For Money
Lennon/McCartney
I am Wookie, hear me roar, like a big ole’ dinosaur
As I spread my big ole’ asscheeks ‘cross the land
I like eatin’ cookie dough on my apple pie al-a-mode
As I wipe out the White House pantry once again
Yes I got thunder thighs, but there ain’t no paradise
I’ll just have Barry raise the peasant’s taxes once again
“Her name’s Hermaphroditee and she rides an air force shell
And you know you can’t rebuke her or you’re gone to distant sands
With tales of brave Obama how his dumbo ears were tortured
By the Moose’s horrid screeching…”
Here come old fattop, she come grumbling up hungry
She got O by short hairs, she one angry soman
She got hair up in her pits
Got to be a toker cuz she eats when she please
“When her moon hits your eyes
Like two big pizza pies that’s a Michee…”
Just a reminder:
Here’s the posted contest rules –
“Take one line of a famous song, and then follow it with a second line, altered a bit.”
Therefore, the first line must be original.
Only the second line can be changed.
No other lines should be involved.
(Lookin’ at you, BFH)
😉
“A wing a pop a wing a pop
A wing a pop a wing a pop
A wing a pop a wing a pop
More nachos please
In the White House the peoples own house
The liar speaks tonight…”
Well we’re living in the White House now
And Barry’s closing all the factories down
Out in the ‘hood they’re killing time
Gettin’ EBT cards, Standing in line
We moved the whole family up to da Second Floor
Spend our weekends flying from shore to shore
Making Honky Devils pay
Make ’em work all the time, night & day
And we’re living in the White House now
(Billy Joel ~ ‘Allentown’)
@Boobie ~ you ever see Presley when he got old & fat …. spitting image of Big Momma …. & you never saw both of them together… did ya? 😉
♫♪…”Me and my Mon-key strolling down dee ab-a-noo!!” ….♪
Easy to Be Hard
Three Dog Night
How can moochy be so heartless
How can moochy be so cruel
Easy to be hard
Easy to be cold
In the jungle, the mighty jungle
The moochy sleeps tonight
In the jungle, the mighty jungle
The moochy sleeps tonight
I don’t feel safe in this world no more
I don’t want to die in a nuclear war
I want to sail away to a distant shore
And make like an ape woman.
Suddenly I’m not half the man I used to be
Keep spending all your dough just on me
Two and a half hours and you guys didn’t think of this one?
She walked up to me and she asked me to dance
I asked her her name and in a dark brown voice she said Obama
Mitchell Obaaaaama
(“Lola” by The Kinks)
Well i’m not dumb but i can’t understand
Why he pretends to be a woman and his mate pretends to be a man
Obaaaaama! Mitch and Barry Omaaaaama!
I could spend all night on this song alone!
She picked me up and sat me on her knee
And said dear boy you’d better bend over for me.
If you see a faded sign by the side of the road that says
15 Miles to the, Rib Shack!
Rib Shack yeah
I pushed her away
I walked to the door
I fell to the floor
I got down on my knees
Then Barry said move over, ’cause that’s only for me.
Girls will be boys and boys will be girls
It’s a mixed up muddled democrap world that votes Obaaaama
Mitch and Barry Obaaaaama
No one knows what it’s like
To be the black man
To be the sack man
Behind angry black eyes
Out here in the fields
EBT pays our meals
I get my black into my blaming
Baba O’Reily
I was born in a crossfire hurricane,
And I scowl, when I don’t get it my way..
She’s a really, really, really, really, big pain the ass.
Jumpin Jack Flash take II
Lady, I’m your knight in dull armor and I loathe you. Kenny Rogers.
I’ve got 2 chickens to paralyze.
Dead skunk in the middle of the road…
300 pounds of clay
Rings on her fingers, bells on her toes and bone in her nose. Ho Ho
Ooooh that smell
Can’t you smell that smell
Ooooh that smell
The smell of Moosh surrounds you
What a Hip! – Tower of Power
That’s why they call me pit bull
’cause I’m the she-man of the land when they see me
They say oooooh
Who let the dogs out
Woof, woof, woof, woof, woof
“And there’s nothing I can do
A total eclipse of the fart.”
There’s a there’s a place in France where a veiled Moochelle will dance.
Moochie, Moochie
Give me your answer, do
You’re half crazy
Over the love of food
“Daisy Bell – Bicycle Built for Two”
Maria’s song from West Side Story rewritten for Mooch
I feel shitty.
Oh, so shitty
I feel shitty and witless and dull.
Such an ugly face,
Such an ugly dress,
Such an ugly smile,
Such an ugly me!
Who let Michell out?
Who, Who, Who who-who
Who let the Mooch out?
Who, Who, Who who-who
Oh She’s got a brand new pair of drumsticks, and you’ve got a nice chick-pea
Oh she eats big ol’ pile of chicken and
doesn’t save any for thee
Barry bought a coconut, and went and showed his wife,
and she de-manded the coconut
de-manded the coconut
He was gonna eat it but he couldn’t get it cracked cause
she de-manded the coconut
de-manded the coconut
If a face could launch a thousand ships…
Where would they all go?
Dude looks like a lady
Can’t judge a Mooch by his cover
He has no love for any other
A bulge put me wise to the gender in disguise
He has a body of a tranny Adonis
Lord, it really wasn’t a surprise
Dude, (Looks Like a Lady)
Aerosmith
Oh, I wonder, wonder who, mmbadoo-ooh, who –
Who wrote the Book Of Glub
(THE MONOTONES — “The Book Of Love”)
*realize I’m late to this, but I cannot pass up this kind of contest!
Brenda Lee’s “Rocking Around The Christmas Tree”……
“Later we’ll have some fuckin pie”.. Ya gotta listen to it to hear it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_6xNuUEnh2g
Pumpkin pie. Like what they do in West Virginia on Thanksgiving, Pump kin…..