Dear Lobo Parents,
This morning we received a report from a student that there was allegedly a weapon on campus. After investigating the concern, it was determined that a student thought he heard the word “gun,” but in fact it was another student asking forsome “gum.”
The safety of our students is always foremost on our list of priorities, so we take these concerns seriously. We continue to encourage students to report anything they see or hear that causes them concern. Fortunately, in this case, it was a misunderstanding and there was no threat to our school or need to conduct a lockdown.
Because we are conducting the PSAT, we were able to hold students in their extended class periods to investigate the concern with little to no disruption to their schedule.
Sincerely,
Michelle Chae
Principal, LHS
The school kindly requests that in the future these words and phrases be carefully enunciated:
-Be careful when discussing the movie Shogun
-don’t refer to a bathroom as the “piss stall”
-Clearly say Jacuzzi, don’t punch the “uzzi” part
-Don’t refer to the marching band instrument a glock, it’s a glockenspiel
-The college is Cal-Tech, not Kel-Tec
You get the idea.
Hey, how about we change the word “gum” to “zum”?
In all seriousness, do you really think America can survive another year of this horsesh!t? I think not.
Hi Jack!
The Russians and Chinese must piss their pants every day, as they read these ridiculous stories.
They’d be funny if they weren’t so insane.
and it was….bazooka, bubble gum…
Near as I can tell this may be new mexico………….????
And bullshit sounds like bullets
Kyle, Texas
This story reminds me of Woody Allen’s movie Take The Money And Run where he tried to rob a bank with a note saying he had a gub and the bank teller just laughed at him. Micro aggressions suck, sooner or later if this madness keeps up we won’t be to say anything lest it offend someone. Get over it people, get the wax out of your ears and hear the word gum instead of gun, otherwise some idiot will soon say we need gum control and I’m not kidding.
If it was Bazooka bubble gum they’d probably charge him with possession of assault gum because a bazooka is a weapon and they can’t have that with their idiot zero tolerance policies towards any kind of presumed violence. Bizarro World is starting to sound like its more normal than we are becoming because of these idiot progtards.
I almost have enough magazines to start taking down notes!
Easy fix, just giving it a new mandatory name, like reciprocating chewing breath enhancement.
What’s that, chewing sounds like shooting? Oh well.
At what point do you take your kids out of the school and say the hell with this. Vote with your feet, that’s the only thing that I understand.
Or change it to mug. No, wait a minute!
The school has now done its theater of the absurd for the decade. Pathetic.
Fresh Prince theme music….shootin’ some bball.
Quick! Call the cops. Lock down the school! Better yet call the thought police.
If there is anyone you need to feel sorry for it’s residents of Athol, Id.
Maybe this is where Barky should locate his “Library”.
It would solidify his claim to be the greatest Athol resident.
queue the nuke
Since “gum” is not allowed in school, it is a “gum free zone.” This incident is a hoax; there is no gum, thus no reason to ask for any.
..meant cue the nuke
Also… if you have a friend named Jack, and you see him at the airport, be sure to tell him, “Hello, Jack!” and not, “Hi, Jack!”
All is needed is a cliff
for the lemmings
to jump off.
Good riddance.
“This gun tastes like shit”
…and @willysgoatgruff wins the thread!
The problem here isn’t that some kid mistook the word gum for gun, or even that the douchebags in the school administration went into lockdown mode over this.
The problem is, the student heard, “…piece of gum…” but thought it was, “…piece of gun.” Excuse me? Piece of gun?! This is how far education in this country has fallen. A student with the proper training in the English language would have thought “…piece of gun?” and then immediately corrected himself with, “Oh! Piece of GUM!” Only a complete idiot would have failed to make the connection and realize the mistake with piece of gun.
His teachers should be fired because they didn’t instruct him in the basics of English; while the word piece is slang for gun, piece of gun would be improper. This entire episode could have been avoided had the student been taught correctly. I blame the union schools.
What a bunch of fuggin morons.
Students, teachers, and administrators.
Prolly the parents, too.
Gum doesn’t kill people. People with gum kill people.
Ask ze.
“Is that a stick of gum in your pocket, or are you happy to see me?”