NYPost: Fifty years on, the “Star Trek” franchise is still fresh: It keeps coming up with new ways to suck. From the corny sermonizing and furniture-quality acting of the original TV series to the senseless ker-blammo of 2013’s “Star Trek Into Darkness,” we now coast on the fumes of lackluster comedy that power “Star Trek Beyond.”
They should have called it “Star Trek Into Drowsiness.”
A menopausal James T. Kirk (Chris Pine), having lost his groove when attacked by poodle-sized gremlins, is in a reflective phase: “It can be a challenge to feel grounded when even gravity is artificial,” he says. Deep, bro. Meanwhile, Spock (Zachary Quinto), and the franchise itself, are in mourning for Spock Prime (Leonard Nimoy). Spock’s relationship with Uhura (Zoe Saldana) is on hold: “If an Earth girl says ‘It’s me, not you,’ it’s definitely you,” Bones (Karl Urban) tells him. Hey kids, it’s “Seinfeld” in space: a blockbuster about nothing. read more
It’s almost like special effects and well made props can’t make up for incomprehensibly shitty writing, directing, and acting.
It was the first in this series with Chris Pine as Kirk that finished me for CGI forever. Probably just a coincidence, but in all those ‘terrifying’ scenes where Kirk nearly fell into oblivion I couldn’t feel any fear that he actually would. I knew that CGI would save him, impossibly.
Never liked Star Trek.
Forget it. There is little imagination in the film industry today. Remakes and sequels then remakes of sequels and so on. Nothing new, no ground breaking, no originality, just bland trite acting lines and automatic weapons fire with explosions wedged in between boobies and swinging half naked behinds. Just maybe there will be another ‘Cape Fear’ soon.
Could it be that people younger than I have had their imaginations stolen?
I watched a lot of Star Trek as a kid. Never did like it. That’s what you get in a home that required repositioning the TeeVee antenna on top of the house to pick up any other show, but Dad didn’t allow it.
UHHHHH No comment
LMAO!
-MJA
Anton Yelchin (Chekov) didn’t die accidentally, he did himself in so that he wouldn’t have to be in any more sequels.
As a kid in the 60’s I was ticked that NBC cancelled The Man From Uncle and replaced it with Star Trek. Star Trek was at best cheesy early on but it quickly became a cult classic. Having said that Star Trek is OK but I like British scifi like Dr. Who more. It’s also been around for 50 years on the BBC.
The only thing good about the new Star Trek is Simon Pegg’s portrayal of Scotty. I am a huge Simon Pegg fan, I love his wacky English shows like Shaun Of The Dead etc.
We are the Borg. You will be accessoried. Resistance is futile, but struggle anyway. We like that. Immediately beam over the one you call Sulu. He’s intriguing.
In another 20 years the crew of the Enterprise will be nothing but females, transgenders and queers.
“To boldly go where no gender identity has gone before.”
I’m a Boomer who grew up loving the original series. Never could like the various TV series spinoffs. Too bad the various movie versions were not made until the original cast had aged far beyond their prime.
And I don’t like any of J J Abrams’ crappy “reboots”, least of all his ST.
Karl Urban does a fine DeForest Kelly impression. Chris Pine has moments, but he’s too young & immature, and the rest of the casting is just horribly wrong– a gay lisping Spock, a BLM Uhura, and now a gay Sulu?
And nonexistent scripts.
Aaaagh. Pass.
B5 Forever!
Up next? A remake of The Magnificent Seven. The Creature from the Black Lagoon. War Games. Death Wish. Escape from New York. Highlander. Scarface. The Wild Bunch. Ben Hur.
Sheesh guys
I watched Peck’s Pat Garrett & Billy the Kid last night-James Coburn was great. Dylan too. A remake of Peck’s the Wild Bunch??? Without Bill Holden or Warren Oates??? Man, I’m really getting up there.
The last Star Trek movie I saw still had the original cast. Do they still use photon torpedoes?
The original series was cool. The rest was garbage.
And now, like Sig94 stated, it’s becoming a homosexual party.
Most modern movies absolutely suck. What’s the last good movie you watched?
Do they still use photon torpedoes? Yes, apparently at any thing that resembles talent.
@MM: Warren Oates…”Bring Me The Head of Alfredo Garcia.” They don’t (can’t) make movies like that anymore; just as well because I don’t think young folks would grok them.
There’s a remake of The Magnificent Seven…..It’s got Denzel in Yul’s role, Chris Pratt as Mcqueen….and a at least one of every race on the planet…
There’s also a remake of Ben Hur coming out. (sigh)
I feel sorry for the ghost of Charlton Heston.
I still enjoy Star Trek. They reboot et ivery generation or so with a good show and ride it into the dirt, getting crappier and crappier. The reboots start out great though. Still a fan.
bcattin,
I have copies of “The Magnificent Seven”, “The Seven Samurai”, and “Samurai Seven” (extended anime, pretty good).
Enough. No more. No. Fuckin’. More. This sounds as bad as the frame-for-frame copy that some young twerp did of Hitchcock’s “Psycho”. May Hollyweird collapse under the weight of its own hubris.
“There’s also a remake of Ben Hur coming out. ”
Don’t you mean, Ben HER, you misogynist!!!!
Resistance is futile.
You will be assimilated.
The Borg
Aaahhh… fuck you Muḥammad!
JMV,
JEEPERS, that was cruel.
Loved the original Star Trek and orginal cast movies. Next generation wasn’t too bad, but the other Trek spin offs – meh. The Abram’s Trek franchise is unbearable.
Anon,
It was either that or a play on the Monty Python skit about the dunce competition. The guy everyone thought would win was disqualified because he ran himself over.
The Monty Python skit was called The Upper Class Twit Of The Year Contest.
Its the fault of the suits that won’t greenlight anything else
There’s lots of new material out there, nothing original gets picked up.
MM – Ghostbusters is now GhostBustHers.
Gonna have 60″ flat screen next week that someone made us a deal on. I’ve never had one before, not even a small one. The first thing I’m going to watch on it?
ZULU.
The best headline for a review of the latest movie headline is in The Register:
Star Trek Beyond: An unwatchable steaming pile of tribble dung
I like Star Trek but will be skipping this one. This one is chock full of left wing political messages. The bad guy is anti-collectivism. Hello! The Borg, (and democrat party) are about the collective. I have read that the original “Sulu” is ticked because they have him come out as gay in this movie.
Besides, a number of them flipped the bird to Trump and made disparaging comments.
Too bad. Karl Urban does a great job as “Bones”.
He won’t make as much money on this one because of his idiot co stars.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l-tAyQAS6JY