Okay, right off the bat, āListen heāre, buck-oā does not need apostrophes or hyphens. That just makes it black. Carry on as you were.
5
The one that was ingrained in me as a child was simply, “Do unto others, ………….
The other one is, “Don’t slip that hand clutch so much!”.
Anybody else grow up on a farm?
5
winner, winner chicken dinner
6
NSYDIC
2
^^^ Even if you have two extras
4
I told a guy: Heās telling us how the cow ate the cabbage. Later he ask me what I meant by that. I had to explain to him that the guy was telling you what he thought he knew, but what he thought he knows and what actually went down are quite different. I thought everyone knows the story about how the cow ate the cabbage. So then I had to spend five minutes to tell him how the cow ate the cabbage story.
8
McFly…McFly!!
2
Thatās the way the cookie crumbles.
8
Pure as the driven snow…
Philadelphia lawyers…
7
Don’t jump.
7
Shape up or you’ll be going down the road talking to yourself.
After I show you where the bear shit in the buckwheat.
Mom wouldn’t say shit if she had a mouthful.
YOU JUST WAIT TILL YOUR FATHER GETS HOME!!!!!
Hehehe…..pull my finger.
8
I still say some of those.
Some others
Homely as a brush fence
What goes around, comes around
Numb as a hake
Dumb as a box of rocks
Number than a pounded thumb
Useless as t*ts on a board
Cute as a button
8
(_____) as the Dickens.
It works for nearly everything.
6
See ya later, alligator!
7
@Beachmom. the actual saying is “useless as tit’s on a boar hog” No lumber involved.
11
two more weeks
3
What IS the story of how the cow ate the cabbage? I never heard it.
8
Frogs: Time’s fun when you’re having flies.
Time wounds all heels.
5
“Wish in one hand and s**t in the other.”
“No good deed goes unpunished.”
“Save a man’s life and he’ll never forgive you.”
“You pullin my d**k?”
“Gag me with a skunk.”
“Two on one; n****r fun.”
“You talk like a man with a paper a**hole.”
“Money talks; bulls**t walks.”
“That guy’s got more s**t with him than Don’s Johns (a porta potty company).”
7
all hat, no cattle.
Bob’s your uncle. (Aussie counts, right?)
easy peasy lemon squeezy
feel like 10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag.
she’s like a bag of antlers
know who butters your bread
happy as a pig in shit
happy as a puppy with two peters
knock you into next week
7
tarnation. anytime tarnation is used should count.
8
We have to be careful, or some woke libtard will tell us that what we said was Raaaaacist (kind of like the Bath and Bodyworks KKK candle – that was only KKK-related if someone was drunk and a moron).
4
Madder than a wet hen.
More nervous than a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.
Sweating like a whore in church.
7
āAt the end of the dayāā¦..
it becomes nightā¦..?????
8
How the cow ate the cabbage:
A while back, a circus came to a small rural town. While the cirkies were putting up the big top, a baby elephant escaped and found his way to a little old ladyās garden up the road. That little old lady was none other than Beulah Mae Buchanan.
Spinster Buchanan was very near-sighted. For years she had refused to entertain the idea she even needed eyeglasses.
She was quite alarmed when she saw the animal in her garden ā alarmed enough to call the police and report, āThereās a cow in my cabbage patch pulling up my cabbages with its tail!ā
The policeman on the other end of the line listened patiently, āA cow is eating your cabbage, maāam? Weāll send someone right out.ā
āI never said he was eatinā āem,ā Miss Beulah emphasized with annoyance.
āNo?ā The policeman replied. āThen what is the cow doing?ā
Beulah Mae blushed, hesitated, and then exclaimed. āWell, you wouldnāt believe me if I told you!ā
And that, is how the cow ate the cabbage.
8
Hell JD, you should have saved that for bad joke Friday!
4
If you get hurt ima whip yo ass.
3
Howdy, neighbor!
3
Things my Dad said:
“Busier than a cat trying to cover shit on a marble floor”
“Heavier than a dead minister.”
4
Speaking of cats…
“The place is so small, can’t swing a dead cat without hitting something.” My grandmother used this phrase.
Always found this saying really disturbing, mean and creepy.
2
“He’s (or she’s) a keeper”
2
“That’s awesome!” Nerdy black people say this, too.
3
“Can I help you?!!!,” said in a very load and not at all helpful tone. To be used on strangers you’ve never met before who are otherwise on your property or in your neighborhood uninvited and unexpected. That one’s become a family joke thanks to a neighbor.
Then there’s my variation on the old Woody Guthery Song
This land is my land
This lands not your land
Can’t you read the sign
You’re trespassing
Sung under one’s voice as a curiosity seeker provides a detailed description of the items store on the back acres of the property. Very annoying, but you can’t really let on how bothersome it is.
Okay, right off the bat, āListen heāre, buck-oā does not need apostrophes or hyphens. That just makes it black. Carry on as you were.
The one that was ingrained in me as a child was simply, “Do unto others, ………….
The other one is, “Don’t slip that hand clutch so much!”.
Anybody else grow up on a farm?
winner, winner chicken dinner
NSYDIC
^^^ Even if you have two extras
I told a guy: Heās telling us how the cow ate the cabbage. Later he ask me what I meant by that. I had to explain to him that the guy was telling you what he thought he knew, but what he thought he knows and what actually went down are quite different. I thought everyone knows the story about how the cow ate the cabbage. So then I had to spend five minutes to tell him how the cow ate the cabbage story.
McFly…McFly!!
Thatās the way the cookie crumbles.
Pure as the driven snow…
Philadelphia lawyers…
Don’t jump.
Shape up or you’ll be going down the road talking to yourself.
After I show you where the bear shit in the buckwheat.
Mom wouldn’t say shit if she had a mouthful.
YOU JUST WAIT TILL YOUR FATHER GETS HOME!!!!!
Hehehe…..pull my finger.
I still say some of those.
Some others
Homely as a brush fence
What goes around, comes around
Numb as a hake
Dumb as a box of rocks
Number than a pounded thumb
Useless as t*ts on a board
Cute as a button
(_____) as the Dickens.
It works for nearly everything.
See ya later, alligator!
@Beachmom. the actual saying is “useless as tit’s on a boar hog” No lumber involved.
two more weeks
What IS the story of how the cow ate the cabbage? I never heard it.
Frogs: Time’s fun when you’re having flies.
Time wounds all heels.
“Wish in one hand and s**t in the other.”
“No good deed goes unpunished.”
“Save a man’s life and he’ll never forgive you.”
“You pullin my d**k?”
“Gag me with a skunk.”
“Two on one; n****r fun.”
“You talk like a man with a paper a**hole.”
“Money talks; bulls**t walks.”
“That guy’s got more s**t with him than Don’s Johns (a porta potty company).”
all hat, no cattle.
Bob’s your uncle. (Aussie counts, right?)
easy peasy lemon squeezy
feel like 10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound bag.
she’s like a bag of antlers
know who butters your bread
happy as a pig in shit
happy as a puppy with two peters
knock you into next week
tarnation. anytime tarnation is used should count.
We have to be careful, or some woke libtard will tell us that what we said was Raaaaacist (kind of like the Bath and Bodyworks KKK candle – that was only KKK-related if someone was drunk and a moron).
Madder than a wet hen.
More nervous than a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.
Sweating like a whore in church.
āAt the end of the dayāā¦..
it becomes nightā¦..?????
How the cow ate the cabbage:
A while back, a circus came to a small rural town. While the cirkies were putting up the big top, a baby elephant escaped and found his way to a little old ladyās garden up the road. That little old lady was none other than Beulah Mae Buchanan.
Spinster Buchanan was very near-sighted. For years she had refused to entertain the idea she even needed eyeglasses.
She was quite alarmed when she saw the animal in her garden ā alarmed enough to call the police and report, āThereās a cow in my cabbage patch pulling up my cabbages with its tail!ā
The policeman on the other end of the line listened patiently, āA cow is eating your cabbage, maāam? Weāll send someone right out.ā
āI never said he was eatinā āem,ā Miss Beulah emphasized with annoyance.
āNo?ā The policeman replied. āThen what is the cow doing?ā
Beulah Mae blushed, hesitated, and then exclaimed. āWell, you wouldnāt believe me if I told you!ā
And that, is how the cow ate the cabbage.
Hell JD, you should have saved that for bad joke Friday!
If you get hurt ima whip yo ass.
Howdy, neighbor!
Things my Dad said:
“Busier than a cat trying to cover shit on a marble floor”
“Heavier than a dead minister.”
Speaking of cats…
“The place is so small, can’t swing a dead cat without hitting something.” My grandmother used this phrase.
Always found this saying really disturbing, mean and creepy.
“He’s (or she’s) a keeper”
“That’s awesome!” Nerdy black people say this, too.
“Can I help you?!!!,” said in a very load and not at all helpful tone. To be used on strangers you’ve never met before who are otherwise on your property or in your neighborhood uninvited and unexpected. That one’s become a family joke thanks to a neighbor.
Then there’s my variation on the old Woody Guthery Song
This land is my land
This lands not your land
Can’t you read the sign
You’re trespassing
Sung under one’s voice as a curiosity seeker provides a detailed description of the items store on the back acres of the property. Very annoying, but you can’t really let on how bothersome it is.