Head Of Iran’s Islamic Guard Claims To Have Coronavirus Detection Machine – IOTW Report

Head Of Iran’s Islamic Guard Claims To Have Coronavirus Detection Machine

Breitbart

Iran’s Major General Hossein Salami reportedly doubled down Friday on claims the Islamic Revolutionary Guards Corps (IRGC) had invented a special magnetic, all purpose coronavirus detector machine that is the envy of the world.

The IRGC commander reasserted claims the miraculous device can remotely identify infected people and contaminated areas within a range of 100 meters through a special aerial system and internal bipolar magnetic fields.

According to an AL Monitor report, Salami claimed dozens of countries have already contacted Iran about the machine, but if the U.S. ever asked Iran to share the technology he would refuse, saying it “would not be shared with the Americans until all sanctions are removed.” More

26 Comments on Head Of Iran’s Islamic Guard Claims To Have Coronavirus Detection Machine

  1. Quick! Sell a hundred thousand of them to Humper Obiden Bama, so he can resell them to his ChiCom friends. He needs some extra money to pay for those legal bills that are coming his way when his father goes down for the final time.

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  2. No reason to disbelieve them – by all means let them diagnose their medical conditions thus.

    In fact, I have a couple of ceramic magnets out in the shed I could let go for just a few thousand gold dinari … each …

    izlamo delenda est …

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  3. “internal bipolar magnetic fields”

    It’s sorta hard to do any detecting at a distance with a magnetic field that’s internal. And bipolar fields are your basic, natural, garden variety fields. I’d like to ask him why they didn’t use magnetic monopoles, as they’re kinda special. I’m sure Al, uh, would cobble some up for him if he stuck his ass up in the air and begged abjectly and promised to kill infidels with them.

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  4. This reminds me of a story. A long time ago there was a guy who set up a mobile Free mammogram Trailer. He had a machine and a white coat, the whole deal. Women would enter, disrobe, stand In front of the machine, lights would blink, the machine would make noise, etc. Told them he would mail them the results. It seems the perv was just taking photos.

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  5. Top 10IO AI. AYE.

    Shadow Fighter ready.

    Tiny Time Travelin’ Finger Slinger.

    Tonight, Tonight.

    or. . .

    Saturday Nights All Right For Fighting.

    What’s it gonna be?

    Wait For IT.

  6. He is trying to be relevant in a crisis that requires no military intervention, and at a time when popular discontent was rising over the bloated military budget when the medical system was broken — before the Xi virus hit.

    Unfortunately, this sort of magnety mumbo-jumbo finds legitimacy in some “scholarly” journals. He is probably basing his lie on a commonly available diagnostic machine that supposedly measures the magnetic fields of the body. Likely a Maoist-medical-marvel invention, or a holdover from the magnetic medicine scams sold popularly (including Sears catalog, along with electrified groin trusses) over a hundred years ago.

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  7. @ geoff the aardvark

    Apparently, “8-ball” gets censored.

    Maybe “Eight-ball” doesn’t. 😳

    p.s. ANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNND… this time, it DOESN’T. 🙄

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