Hilarious NY Post Article Reads Like The Onion – IOTW Report

Hilarious NY Post Article Reads Like The Onion

Thursday, 13 April 2017, 0:08 BFH Uncategorized 40

Making a long story short –

Douchefountain says he’s done dating hot girls, so he’s marrying this girl–>

Ladies, would you ever, in a million years, participate in this article as the “not hot” woman in the story?

NY Post-

When it came to dating in New York as a 30-something executive in private equity, Dan Rochkind had no problem snagging the city’s most beautiful women.

“I could have [anyone] I wanted,” says Rochkind, now 40 and an Upper West Sider with a muscular build and a full head of hair. “I met some nice people, but realistically I went for the hottest girl you could find.”

Rochkind started dating a woman who isn’t a bikini model, Carly Spindel, in January 2015. The two are now happily engaged.

 

And on and on it goes, profiling beautiful people who’ve decided to deliberately pick people who aren’t as beautiful as they are.

Why? Because beautiful people are self-absorbed and narcissistic and dumb…

Uhh, what about yourselves?

This woman, who considers herself a 9 or 10, has taken to slumming it because beautiful people are shallow. Is this not the worst case of cognitive dissonance you’ve ever heard of?

This shirtless violinists feels the same way.

Others say the stereotypes about pretty people being shallow are true, even if they’re hotties themselves.

“From my personal experience, people who are better looking are less likely to pursue advanced degrees, or play an instrument or learn other languages,” says Benedict Beckeld, a 37-year-old Brooklyn writer with a Ph.D in philosophy and the body of an Adonis. But he’s quick to note that he’s not just a great set of abs — he also plays the violin and speaks seven languages.

The stupidest article in the history of the otherwise solid NY Post. (Unless, of course, the NY Post is posting this to elicit the exact response I’m having. In that case, well done. Well done.)

 

40 Comments on Hilarious NY Post Article Reads Like The Onion

  12. The first story sounds like a guy who couldn’t get enough dates with “hot” women, so he’s going for second tier. If I was “hot”, I’d pass him up, too. He’s probably got something weird about his body he’s over-compensating for, like a tail or something.

  16. He’s not all that, I wouldn’t do him. The lady he’s with isn’t ugly either but the ring placement on her hand? Hmmm…I wonder if they are not each other’s beards?

  24. 7 languages my rear end. Can he carry out a conversation on the phone with a native speaker? I’ll give him 2 maybe 3. I suppose if you are from Switzerland perhaps, you have 4.

  29. What do I know, but IMHO what’s her name there ain’t no 9 or 10.
    The dude playing the fiddle there w/out his shirt looks like a complete douchebag fukwit pinhead. What is the friggin point

  30. Depends on your definition of beauty and “10”.

    If well done make up and clothing is a part of it, then I think you have your priorities messed up and great disappointment is in your future. So shallow. That’s what he found.

    The 10s way above my league have nothing to do with beauty pageants and I feel so unworthy in their presence.

    I am certain we have some of those as regulars here.

  33. isn’t beauty in the eye of the beholder ?

    what some one else may consider beautiful you may consider plain or ugly. so who is the final arbiter ?

    it’s like saying the earth is warming too much.
    who knows what the right temperature for the earth is ?

    who’s to say what beauty is for some one else ?

    pointless article.

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