How do you like them apples? – IOTW Report

How do you like them apples?

Man won’t descend tall Seattle tree, despite police coaxing.

AP
AP

MSN- SEATTLE — Despite hours of police coaxing, a man remained near the top of an 80-foot tall sequoia tree in downtown Seattle early Wednesday, refusing to come down.

Authorities were alerted to an unidentified man in the tree around 11 a.m. Tuesday and he was still clinging to its branches at 2:30 a.m. PDT Wednesday, more than 15 hours later.

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35 Comments on How do you like them apples?

  1. The homeless are revered in Seattle. They do everything they can to make life cushy for them & basically let them run roughshod over the city. They are allowed to pitch tents or camp anywhere they please & you go to jail if you do anything to stop them.

  2. What’s the fuss and worry? He’s a free (enough) citizen. Let him stay up there. If he falls and (hurts/kills) himself, that’s on him, not the city of Seattle. Pffft. Ignore him. He’s just another attention whore, looking for his 15 minutes.

  3. @JohnS – I once called the fire dept in the little town I lived in and asked them if they would come and get my kitten out of a tree. The guy said no, and then asked me if I’d ever seen a cat skeleton hanging from a tree.

  4. Wow. Maybe ya’ll aren’t just a bunch of racists, maybe you’re just a bunch of hate-filled jerks. It’s a dude in a tree, why does that bother you so much? You don’t know what he wants or believes, he could be mentally incapacitated or straight up crazy.

    “Cut the tree down!” “No, set it on fire!” “No, shoot him with a high powered rifle!” It’s a dude in a tree. What has this guy done that warrants you cheering for him to be severely injured or dead?

  5. @James Webb, and all snowflakes out there, you know who you are:

    Jimmy Jimmy Jimmy, how many times do I hafta tell you IOTWreport is a funny, sarcastic, over the top humor site that sometimes breaks out in political WWF, cage fighting, arm wrestling, and vile language.

    Don’t take it personally. None of us are going to run out and shoot the poor guy, he is already safely out of the tree.

    But, if you ask me, a taser would have taken him out PDQ.

    😉

  6. James,
    He is an attractive nuisance to the neighborhood, he is a danger to himself and anybody beneath the tree.
    He’s an idiot and deserves to be made fun of.

    As long as that’s OK w/ you

  7. It’s Seattle. The dumb son-of-a-bitch’s are claiming he identifies as a Christmas tree ornament. Can’t have anything that might in any way be linked to Christianity hanging about in a public tree. If he had told them he was a Winter Festival ornament, or an Oscar Meyer Wiener, there wouldn’t be any issue.

  8. Put one of those squirrels protectors around the tree, and make it really really big so he can’t climb down. He’ll die of starvation and fall off. Done. Too cruel? I don’t give a crap.

  9. Time to deploy Lazlo Industries ‘Chiggers in a Can’
    Each can is guaranteed to have at least one hundred thousand live chiggers
    The cans fit most standard tear gas/grenade launchers.

    Or you could have a drone squirt cheeze whiz on him and let the eagles drive him out.

    Or just play the Eagles, that will work, too.

  10. James Webb: If you haven’t figured it out by now, this is a satire site. Calm down. Listen to Uncle Al’s advice and take advantage of your blunt options. Leave the loon in the tree alone. Nature will take it’s course. Maybe the guy thinks he’s an owl. Who cares?
    Why should law enforcement or anyone else waste their time trying to get this hippie down?

Comments are closed.