I Have Used Butcher paper, and Newspaper. How About You?

33 Comments on I Have Used Butcher paper, and Newspaper. How About You?

1. I suppose this is, in principle, good to know. But my idea of camping is Hampton Inn and Suites and on my rare travels I pack a roll of my preferred TP.

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2. I got a hand full of young elephant ear leaves once,and some stalks of nettles …….. 60 yrs ago….still feel it

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3. I once used a hamster.

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4. Switched to those cottonelle moist wides 20 years ago. Never looked back. The only way to wipe!

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5. I’ve used butcher paper to make a template. I’ve used newspaper to wrap up Christmas ornaments. What was the question again?

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6. TMI MJA

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7. Does that make you a vegetarian a$$ wiper?

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8. Don’t forget all those Sears and Roebuck Yellow Pages, or those ferom Phone Books as well.

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9. Corn cob works fine.

   Eat the corn first.

   And wash the butter off.

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10. Use your left hand Luke I do.

    Infidel.

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11. Do like the ragheads: wipe your ass with your left hand and then run it through your hair – that’s why they wear table cloths on their heads and their women wear gladbags.

    No muss; no fuss!

    mortem tyrannis
    izlamo delenda est …

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12. I’d say use this book, but it’s already full of shot.

    https://d28hgpri8am2if.cloudfront.net/book_images/onix/cvr9781501175572/what-happened-9781501175572_lg.jpg

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13. When I surveyed deep into the woods of coastal South Carolina we went in at 7 AM and came out at 5 PM.When you seen me come out with the lower front part of my T shirt cut off, you knew what happened………

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14. Tell nuzzles they should use wax paper.
    That way they can save it for later…

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15. Muzzies

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16. Wild rhubarb leaves when i was a yungin and in the bush.

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17. Will using marijuana leaves to wipe your ass make you high. Or just stupid.

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18. For God’s sake, make sure to pull the pine cone in the proper direction.

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19. I’ve been hiking the New England forests for forty years. It’s really not that hard to keep a good amount of Kleenex in ones pocket.

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20. I just line up with the dog and scoot forward. Liberals scoot backwards.

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21. How much residue after you poo is a great indicator of overall health. If you need to kill a couple pine trees getting that thing clean indicates you will die soon. Well, at least will indicate you’re not healthy. If you use a fig leaf and leave a little brown stain on it, you’re good. Gods honest truth.

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22. I always look for chihuahuas wearing tiny sombreros…..

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23. “in a pinch”…nice touch

    Try coffee filters, affordable, numerous and much better than corncobs.

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24. “in a pinch”

    Well, if you’re ‘pinching’ while you wipe, you might need a spoon.

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25. Bear and Bunny sitting on a log, pooping.

    Bear: “Mr. Bunny, do you have problems with poop sticking to your fur?”
    Bunny: “Why, no, Mr. Bear, I don’t.”

    So the Bear grabbed the Bunny and wiped his ass with him.

    mortem tyrannis
    izlamo delenda est …

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26. @Brad ~ I could “use a fig leaf and leave a little brown stain on it”
    buuuuuuuuuutt …. I’d have a big brown stain on my ass!

    worked in Industrial/Commercial electrical construction for 10 years & you use what’s on hand …. underwear, sox, flannel shirt sleeves, newspaper, phone book, note paper, job specs, blueprints … learned real quick to bring a backup plan to the Porta John.

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27. Wax paper burger wrappers. Zero absorbancy, it just smears it around.

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28. Fast food and other restaurant napkins kept in the car console. Does I-71 at a dead standstill for hours count as camping?

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29. Yep fast food napkins in the desert after a hearty meal at Del Taco in Barstow. That’s why they give you so many napkins and all the Del Scorcho packs you can grab 🙂

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30. In a pinch, use your own underwear. I’ve done it a few times in the middle of nowhere with a bad case of the shits. When it’s real bad and underwear isn’t enough, you’ve also got your socks. If it’s worse than that hopefully you have an undershirt.

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31. I still live in a first world country. There is plenty of TeePee for my bunghole.

    – Cornholio

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32. @ ecp Sunday, 29 October 2023, 1:22 at 1:22 am,

    Thank you, I really needed the laugh…

    FJB

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33. Don’t forget the annual Medicare books…

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