It’s Bill Clinton’s Birthday – IOTW Report

It’s Bill Clinton’s Birthday

Monday, 19 August 2019, 17:20 MJA Uncategorized 54

What’s in the gift box?

54 Comments on It’s Bill Clinton’s Birthday

  21. Jimmy
    AUGUST 19, 2019 AT 5:56 PM
    “A one-way ticket to Hell.”

    …he earned THAT all by himself, so he’d have to regift it, but everyone he KNOWS has one, too…

    4

  29. @Supernightshade (at 5:52 pm): You don’t need pliers when you can dag a hogget (Warning: extremely gross NSFW description follows!):

    “I was the newest man and had to begin at the bottom – the
    bottom of the sheep itself – literally. I was one of four men in a line, an assembly belt for sheep shearing a young hogget, as a young lamb was called, and he had to ‘dag’ him that is, he must get rid of the bluebottle flies and all the accumulated excreta around the tail. This he did by holding the sheep in his left hand, and his right hand went in and ‘dagged’ the sheep. He grabbed a handful of the sheep’s shit, tossed it aside, and passed the sheep on to the man next to him.

    The next man was me.

    All I had to do was stick my face into this gruesome mess and bite off the young sheep’s testicles. Dag a hogget. I had good teeth. I put my nose into this awful-smelling mess, my teeth solidly around the balls of the six-month-old sheep, and took a bite while I held him upside down. My nose was in fur and ordure. I bit and spat out the product into a pile of what they called prairie oysters. We have them in America too: delicious to eat, but not delicious to remove. They said this was the most sanitary way to de-ball a sheep. After I was done, I passed the sheep onto the next man, who put a little coal tar on the same spot for purposes of cleansing and closing up the wound. The sheep never let out a bleat.”

    ― Errol Flynn, My Wicked, Wicked Ways

    8

  32. …seems like it would be easier to get one of Bill’s victims for dagging purposes, @Vietvet, since they’re probably, eh, “champing at the bit” to de-ball SOMETHING…

    3

  33. …OTOH, @Vietvet, I’ve heard Hillary has a Gorgon-like power to shrink testicles at a look, although whether that means a look FROM her or a look AT her remains unclear…

    6

  49. The keys, all of them to EVERY DOOR, and long distance spray for the cams to the MCC – Manhattan Correctional Center??

    Bill – Shake, shake the box in the air – “Harr harr Hill, wat’s in here, you hasbeen?”

    Hill – “Our ticket to retirement you asshole!”

    5

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