NEW YORK, NY—In a controversial move, Sports Illustrated has unveiled photos of its first ever Baptist swimsuit model, pictured in a floor-length denim skirt, modest collared blouse, and no makeup or jewelry whatsoever, other than her purity ring.
The “hot” photoshoot includes pictures of the woman lying on the beach, rolling around in the water, and reading Passion and Purity on the beach in sexy poses, all while completely covered up.
Christians quickly praised the decision.
“We are glad SI finally sees the value of modesty,” one leading evangelical said. “A woman mostly covered from head to toe is a great precedent to set, and we hope more models going forward will be dressed this modestly.”
more satire HERE
ht/ Jack Duggan Was His Name
Just a matter of time before SI announces they will no longer be doing Swimsuit issues because of pressure from a bunch of ugly bints who are offended.
How long until SI features a tranny?
@Cynic
Playboy beat them to it.
When will the modest men’s swimsuit edition come out?
http://www.bostoncostume.com/old-fashioned-bathing-suit-p2598.html
‘The “hot” photoshoot includes pictures of the woman lying on the beach, rolling around in the water, and reading Passion and Purity on the beach in sexy poses, all while completely covered up.’
Followed by a pic of Nancy Pelosi,,,
Perfect!
Is this the warm up for a Muzzie feature coming soon?
Floor length denim is much more a Pentecostal/Assembly of God thing than Baptist.
I know Becky the Baptist from all the Bluegrass Festivals I go to… don’t be fooled by her modest appearance. Like all other Baptists, she sins all week long and “churches-up” on Sunday. Catch her on a Saturday night at the festival after a few pulls off the jar and “modesty” won’t be what Becky is offering 😉
BABDIST?! Looks more like “Brethren.” Or MAYBE a hippy-dippy Mennonite…
If you invite a Baptist to go fishing on your boat, how do you keep him from drinking all your beer?
Invite a second Baptist
@Road apple – that’s why BB did this satire. There were pictures from a photo shoot going around last week of muzzie women covered head to toe in “bathing” suits as if this is the new in thing.
I’m still undressing her in my mind.
I saw a used men’s bathing suit for sale last week advertised as seldom used with a small hole in left knee.
I adore The Babylon Bee! Laughed ’til I cried at this headline: “Skip and Joanna Gaines Hired to Apply Ship Lap Siding to New Border Wall.”