Well Benny, you can have my recipe for popcorn using lard instead of coconut oil….should really keep those two containers farther apart….
6
I once ate a Dove Bar.
By the time the bubbles began coming out of my mouth I was pretty nauseated.
23
Does looking for your reading glasses for 15 minutes while they’re flipped up on your head quality you to get into this conversation?
32
Other day I was talking to a friend on my cell phone and she asked me if I got her text. I said let me look. Oh my gosh I can’t find my phone. She said it’s in your hand silly. I think I’m losing it and it’s all due to this shut down!!
I may or may not have have once tried to brush my teeth with Clearasil.
14
I spent 5 minutes Friday morning looking for a sock i knew was there seconds ago.And i wasn’t about to leave the room without it.
It had somehow blended into the pillow.
10
@Aaron Burr — A friend has informed me that one should avoid brushing with jock itch cream, and that putting peppermint toothpaste on a fungal rash will wake you right the hell up.
8
Hard to believe we’re the same people who defeated the Soviet Empire.
18
Preparation H is a poor substitute for toothpaste also. That’s what a friend tells me.
9
Lazlo has stumbled upon a ‘life hack’ which make all of our lives easier.
When you lose something, complain bitterly that what you are looking for has obviously been stolen.
The Universe, angered by your nonsense will make it magically appear just so you will have to apologize even if inwardly for your grouchy ass attitude
12
Hell, I keep dreaming I’m living in America….then I read basic news headlines……Not pretty.
16
Sometimes back tracking helps, I find it amazing how things disappear in plain sight. Clutter isn’t my friend.
6
Ham needs to be on rye or a hearty grain bread.
White bread shown is not fit for human consumption.
3
joe6pak
MAY 16, 2020 AT 12:40 AM
“Preparation H is a poor substitute for toothpaste also. That’s what a friend tells me.”
Daily life for me. Most frustrating to not find something that was in my hand just two minutes prior.
Calling my cell phone and finding it in my back pocket happens every so often. Making a second meal only to find the one I thought I made cooling off in the microwave.
I was about 12 one summer and noticed I was forgetting what I went into the kitchen for. My thought when I extrapolated this out into my future: ‘I hope my kids don’t want to put me into an old folks home for stuff like this when I’m old.’
I’ve been like this my whole life.
They say there are three signs of a genius.
1. Forgetfulness
2 & 3 I can’t remember.
11
You saw the aliens when you reached for the mustard. They erased your memory back to when you started thinking about making a sandwich. Happens to me all the time when I walk into a room and can’t remember why.
7
Wot?
B b b b b b b ut that thing? Y’kjnow? that thing …
4
I invented ham sandwiches.
6
Always treat your toothpaste like it’s loaded.
With something else.
2
When I can’t find something for 5 minutes, I start looking for something else. Then I find what I was originally looking for.
10
^^^ Buying a replacement also makes lost items reappear.
13
burner MAY 16, 2020 AT 8:33 AM
When I can’t find something for 5 minutes, I start looking for something else. Then I find what I was originally looking for.
——————————————————–
Answerman Cooper MAY 16, 2020 AT 8:56 AM
^^^ Buying a replacement also makes lost items reappear.
Both have been scientifically proven to be true, literally, thousands of times in my life. In fact, I stop looking and resume my day knowing I’ll run across what I was looking for at some point. I have several duplicate tools because of immediate need, though.
When I reach the point of saturation on this, I’ll be able to just reach out anywhere in the house and find one the several dups of my equipment laying around.
Cluttered, yes. But very convenient since they’re everywhere. 😉
4
LMAYO!
3
I could tell you many “I’m worried” stories. One of the best was when Ghost started to brush his teeth with Ben Gay!! We could hear the screams throughout the house. You’ve got to laugh!
God Bless us all!!
5
………………………………………….
2
My sister came up with a perfect way to remember why you came into a room when you are standing there trying to remember.
She said that you are usually sitting down when you think of something you have to do in another room. Sometimes, you go back and sit down – then you remember!
Her idea? Don’t bother to go back and sit down, just touch your butt. You have fooled your body into thinking it really did go back to sit down, then – viola! you remember why you were there!
Does it work? I dunno, try it.
3
@ Claudia MAY 16, 2020 AT 11:54 AM
I would, but your sister is too far away and she might not be happy about it.
Oh. MY butt? Never mind.
I use this myself. Except it’s a version of the “stop looking for that item and carry on”
Like going back to where you thought of what you wanted, I resume carrying on and I am presented – once again – with the need that impelled me to move in the first place. In Biden-ese: “Oh yeah, I need to find that thing! You know – the thing!”
3
I once gargled with Pine-O-Pine. I do not recommend it but my breath was as fresh as a mountain forest.
I’m no help, I can’t find it either.
LMAO!
I ONCE MADE A PEANUT BUTTER AND SPAGHETTI SANDWICH, LATER A MAC AND CHEESE SMOOTHIE, NOT ON PURPOSE..
SOON I WILL BE PUBLISHING MY “BENITO’S ACCIDENTAL RECIPES” COOKBOOK!!
If it does not have swiss and mayo, on rye? It ain’t mine…
Tuna, ham and cheese, alternate as required, rinse and repeat.
Abbott and Costello.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MAnLAnK_Lno
Well Benny, you can have my recipe for popcorn using lard instead of coconut oil….should really keep those two containers farther apart….
I once ate a Dove Bar.
By the time the bubbles began coming out of my mouth I was pretty nauseated.
Does looking for your reading glasses for 15 minutes while they’re flipped up on your head quality you to get into this conversation?
Other day I was talking to a friend on my cell phone and she asked me if I got her text. I said let me look. Oh my gosh I can’t find my phone. She said it’s in your hand silly. I think I’m losing it and it’s all due to this shut down!!
@BFH – do not challenge me! Bubbles you say? :>)
Did it look like this?
“It’s SWISS cheese, a little bit strong” – Darla
“what a sandwich” – Alfalfa
The Little Rascals,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZ6IDYjgLSI
I may or may not have have once tried to brush my teeth with Clearasil.
I spent 5 minutes Friday morning looking for a sock i knew was there seconds ago.And i wasn’t about to leave the room without it.
It had somehow blended into the pillow.
@Aaron Burr — A friend has informed me that one should avoid brushing with jock itch cream, and that putting peppermint toothpaste on a fungal rash will wake you right the hell up.
Hard to believe we’re the same people who defeated the Soviet Empire.
Preparation H is a poor substitute for toothpaste also. That’s what a friend tells me.
Lazlo has stumbled upon a ‘life hack’ which make all of our lives easier.
When you lose something, complain bitterly that what you are looking for has obviously been stolen.
The Universe, angered by your nonsense will make it magically appear just so you will have to apologize even if inwardly for your grouchy ass attitude
Hell, I keep dreaming I’m living in America….then I read basic news headlines……Not pretty.
Sometimes back tracking helps, I find it amazing how things disappear in plain sight. Clutter isn’t my friend.
Ham needs to be on rye or a hearty grain bread.
White bread shown is not fit for human consumption.
joe6pak
MAY 16, 2020 AT 12:40 AM
“Preparation H is a poor substitute for toothpaste also. That’s what a friend tells me.”
…Nancy uses it for her dentures. That’s why THIS.
https://www.kcconfidential.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/02/2018-02-01-d4a7a7e2_large.jpg
Daily life for me. Most frustrating to not find something that was in my hand just two minutes prior.
Calling my cell phone and finding it in my back pocket happens every so often. Making a second meal only to find the one I thought I made cooling off in the microwave.
I was about 12 one summer and noticed I was forgetting what I went into the kitchen for. My thought when I extrapolated this out into my future: ‘I hope my kids don’t want to put me into an old folks home for stuff like this when I’m old.’
I’ve been like this my whole life.
They say there are three signs of a genius.
1. Forgetfulness
2 & 3 I can’t remember.
You saw the aliens when you reached for the mustard. They erased your memory back to when you started thinking about making a sandwich. Happens to me all the time when I walk into a room and can’t remember why.
Wot?
B b b b b b b ut that thing? Y’kjnow? that thing …
I invented ham sandwiches.
Always treat your toothpaste like it’s loaded.
With something else.
When I can’t find something for 5 minutes, I start looking for something else. Then I find what I was originally looking for.
^^^ Buying a replacement also makes lost items reappear.
Both have been scientifically proven to be true, literally, thousands of times in my life. In fact, I stop looking and resume my day knowing I’ll run across what I was looking for at some point. I have several duplicate tools because of immediate need, though.
When I reach the point of saturation on this, I’ll be able to just reach out anywhere in the house and find one the several dups of my equipment laying around.
Cluttered, yes. But very convenient since they’re everywhere. 😉
LMAYO!
I could tell you many “I’m worried” stories. One of the best was when Ghost started to brush his teeth with Ben Gay!! We could hear the screams throughout the house. You’ve got to laugh!
God Bless us all!!
………………………………………….
My sister came up with a perfect way to remember why you came into a room when you are standing there trying to remember.
She said that you are usually sitting down when you think of something you have to do in another room. Sometimes, you go back and sit down – then you remember!
Her idea? Don’t bother to go back and sit down, just touch your butt. You have fooled your body into thinking it really did go back to sit down, then – viola! you remember why you were there!
Does it work? I dunno, try it.
@ Claudia MAY 16, 2020 AT 11:54 AM
I would, but your sister is too far away and she might not be happy about it.
Oh. MY butt? Never mind.
I use this myself. Except it’s a version of the “stop looking for that item and carry on”
Like going back to where you thought of what you wanted, I resume carrying on and I am presented – once again – with the need that impelled me to move in the first place. In Biden-ese: “Oh yeah, I need to find that thing! You know – the thing!”
I once gargled with Pine-O-Pine. I do not recommend it but my breath was as fresh as a mountain forest.
I make a list to take to the grocery store….
Why do I waste my time like that….?
Dadof4, bwwaaaahahahahaha
I’m going to tell her what you said!! 😉
I’m in trouble now. Claudia’s telling on me. 😎