Valiant: Australians have been urged not to deliberately seek out contaminated spinach products in order to get high, after over 200 people experienced symptoms across the country.
Food items containing spinach, such as various salads, offered in supermarkets across Australia have been recalled due to a suspected contamination, which authorities believe to have originated at Riviera Farms in the southern state of Victoria.
At the time of writing, over 200 people have reported symptoms from the contamination, including “delirium or confusion, hallucinations, dilated pupils, rapid heartbeat, flushed face, blurred vision, dry mouth and skin, and fever.” Riviera Farms said that they were testing weeds on the farm “which can have health consequences if consumed.”
“As soon as we were advised of the possible weed contamination from one of our customers, we immediately advised them to remove our impacted spinach from their shelves, and contacted state health and federal food authorities,” a spokesman for the farm said. more
I Yam What I Yam
ACK ACK ACK ACK ACK
Wut?
I had a can of Tops menthol tobacco go bad. I opened the can one day and saw some green fungus. DARN. I scooped out the fungaloid tobacco and made a nice fag with one of those steel trap cigarette makers (remember those?).
Wow. I was hosed for about 20 minutes. Auditory and visual hallucinations like you get when you have sleep paralysis.
I threw the can in the firebox and probably killed half the neighborhood.
I guess I am a truly ne’er do well scumbag.
They’re high to the finish ’cause they eats their spinach.
Summoning his cosmic power
And glowing slightly from his toes
His psychic emanations flowed
I eat the green leaves
Strange hot flashes overcome
My better judgment
What a way to get people to consume your product.. tell them not to otherwise they’ll trip balls.
@ecp — Interesting idea! I wonder if it’s Pfizer spinach?
Yah, I smoked corn silk and banana peels when I was a kid to no avail.
I have never been so fucked up as when I smoked Tops with fungus. I’ve been a lot fucked up. I have drank a half gallon of Rhine Wine, I have shit my trousers… I have smoked weed that gave me a 140 heart rate… 4 hours later.
Funky Tops is bad shit.
I’ll stick to toad-licking, thank you very much.
Joe Biden: I used to sniff glue to get high, but now I sniff little girls’ hair whenever I find them. I really get off on that.
Two young Australians, Mick and BG, looking around in a Melbourne grocery store:
Mick: Oi, BG, whad y’a suppose this spinish sheit looks loik?
BG: Dunno Mick…but we can get hoigh from bananas… we don’t need any spinish.
Mick: Ya mean just eat a banana to get a buzz?
BG: Nah, ya gotta cook it first…my grandpa told me oll abowt it…ya just roast the skin in an oven till it gets noice an’ crisp…then just eat it… I think it taiks a lot of ‘em…we betta boi four bunches.
BG and Mick go to the check out line and pay 108 Australian dollars for four bunches of bananas.
Back home, BG and Mick peel all the bananas, put the peels in the oven, and cook them for 45 minutes, then let them cool off and proceed to eat the roasted skins of 32 bananas.
Two hours later, after vomiting up the contents of their stomachs, Mick and BG are in the ER of Melbourne General Hospital, suffering from severe abdominal cramps.
BG: Y’know Mick, we bought yellow bananas instead of green ones. Next toime we boi the green ones.
Mick: Ow roight maite, green ones next toime.