Bad Joke Friday! – IOTW Report

Bad Joke Friday!

Yep. They’re pretty bad. Click here

35 Comments on Bad Joke Friday!

  1. How Toulouse Lautrec got his name.

    He started his career as a mechanic in a factory. He was a failure as a mechanic because he was frail and had little strength. He could not tighten the bolts on the various machines in the factory because he was so weak.

    His boss would scold him and yell: “It’s too loose, Lautrec.” After a few weeks his coworkers began calling him “Toulouse”. The boss fired poor Lautrec two months after he started. Word got around about the deformed little man and how he was so weak he could not properly tighten bolts.

    And the name “Toulouse” stuck with him until he died.

  2. Toulouse Lautrec walks into tattoo pallor to get his arm inked.
    “What you you like it to say?” asks the owner.

    “Why ‘Born Toulose’ of course.” Lautrec answers.

  3. As long as this is still open I’ll throw this one in as there’s the reversal of expected behavior.
    Actually, you can blame SNS as he suggested putting it here.

    The other night I was invited out for a night with the “girls.” I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, “I promise!” Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easily. Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hallway started up and cuckooed 3 times.

    Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. (Even when totally smashed… 3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos = MIDNIGHT !)

    The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, I told him “MIDNIGHT”… he didn’t seem pissed off in the least. Whew, I got away with that one! Then he said “We need a new cuckoo clock.” When I asked him why, he said, “Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said “oh shit” Cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted.

  4. Anymouse, Had to share with you that after retirement I took up some amateur bird watching and met a more serious “Birder” whose niece asked him if they could go to have lunch at “Hooters” sometime? So he asked her why “Hooters”? She said “I just want to see the owls”

  5. @Harry

    Yeah, Dildo NF&Lab. It’s gotten famous for its name, but also it’s the birthplace of the tall blond wife of Kiss guy – Gene Simmons, I think is his name.

    It used to be called Dildo Run. I think the townspeople got it officially changed because they were tired of being the butt of jokes.

    Their reasoning was something like this: Nobody has ever seen a running dildo. Mister Mayor, please lets drop the “Run” so people will stop making fun of us.

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