Baseball’s Michael Sam – IOTW Report

Baseball’s Michael Sam

ca-denson-face-7474Obama should be calling him any day now.

David Denson plays for the Milwaukee Brewers farm team. He just came out of the closet and is getting plenty of ink and accolades, not for his baseball talent, but because he prefers wang in his chocolate starfish. That’s praiseworthy.

So when he doesn’t get signed by a MLB team it will be “homophobia,” not because he strikes out in 1/3rdĀ of his at bats.

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36 Comments on Baseball’s Michael Sam

  1. Oh dear. The gubmint is SO helpful, isn’t it? Now everyone will think all gays are horrible athletes. Is that what they wanted to have happen? BTW, there are openly gay athletes but no one cares because they don’t announce themselves, make a big deal out of themselves just for being gay. Their pride is in what they do, not who they do.
    Idiots.

  2. Oh, good grief! NOT baseball? Tennis, sure. Football, been there. Curling, naturally.

    But not baseball!

    Oh, what am I saying? Chocolate Starfish is the new national sport.

  3. In 2013, he struck out 35% of the time and has since reduced that to 33%. See how much better they become once out of the closet? *snicker*. I mean, gays are superior to heteros, and those that are only 98% perfect will achieve total 100% perfection once out of the closet.

  4. By the way, I hate all the happy friendly terms used to describe buggery. Gay, chocolate, starfish, pansy, fairy. It should be shame, shit, butt hole, crab, poison ivy, ogre.

  5. He’s in his third year of Pro ball, playing in the Advanced rookie Pioneer league. So if the Brewers don’t advance him to the Major League club ASAP (bypassing long-A, AA and AAA ball), then the Brewers are homophobes, right?

  6. Let’s try:

    pervert
    dick licker
    shit licker
    ass sucker
    knob gobbler
    butthole surfer
    sodomite
    knob polisher
    cocksucker
    ass reamer
    B. Hussein ObamaBot
    tongue-in-groove
    carpet muncher
    lickety split
    dick breath
    fart sniffer

    Did I leave any out?

  7. Thas my boy! He cain’t play ball worth shit, but lordy lordy! Can he suck a dick! He was the most popular boy in the project. Every boy who couldn’t get a date, or had a drippin, oozin dick come to see my boy! Made some pretty good side money, too!

    An take it up the ass!? Land o Goshen! You gotta be shittin me! I swear that’s where his daddy parked his Honda! That boy never makes a sound when he fart! The stink jus kinda creep up on ya! Some a dem BIG boys come by there, and my boy could take every inch! Not cryin like some l’il dumb slut, neither! I b’lieve Revrum Al come by a couple times …

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