Help Obama defeat terrorists with these #BetterIdeasForISIS

91 Comments on Help Obama defeat terrorists with these #BetterIdeasForISIS

1. Keep Bill Cosby away from your drinks. lol

2. Buy some A/C. Heat makes you people CrAnKy!

3. Eat a Snickers!

4. Try Cactus gardening

5. Brush the sand out of your ass and have some Melatonin tea.

6. Intern at the Clinton Foundation.

7. For desert conditions, white apparel would be cooler. Maybe a point on top of their ski-mask for better air circulation. Oh wait……that outfit’s already been claimed.

8. Learn Common Core Math

9. Drive eCars

10. Recycle bottles, cans, paper, and women

11. Become Obozos and Mooches official dingle berry removers. It’ll take alot of you guys!!

12. Shoot yourself in the fucking head.

13. Start a vegan restaurant specializing in tomato leaf tea and rhubarb leave salads!

14. Make Confederate Flags!

15. Become Joe Biden’s 2016 presidential campaign staffers

16. Suck a dick for a quarter.

17. Lick your friends’ asses on the Lena Dunham show.

18. . . . and she’s off!

    MJA, you must just wait for these types of stories . . . you’re so good at it!

19. Kiss Lena Dunham on the lips.
    (her choice)

20. Become cage fighters against a cage full of honey badgers.

21. Poke a Grizzly Bear with a stick.

22. Tell Chuck Norris he’s a pussy – to his face.

23. Go on tour with Miley Cyrus.

24. Teach an ESL class in Los Angeles.

25. Leap in front of speeding dump trucks, and stop them, with your bare hands – or admit you’re a practicing homosexual to the Imam.

26. Become an 0bamacare navigator

27. Cure constipation by drinking drain cleaner.

28. Leave the women alone and mutilate your own genitals.

29. Whitehouse intern.

30. Sell pulled-pork sandwiches at the Jihadi gathering.

31. Draw Mohammed cartoons.

32. Compete in a Hair Show

33. Open a whiskey bar next to the Allah’s Snackbar.

34. Hog farming.

35. Give 2 quarts of blood a week and win unlimited virgins!

36. A simple five-point plan:

    (1) Take two Qurans.
    (2) Shit on one of them.
    (3) Cover that with the other Quran.
    (4) Eat the resulting sandwich.
    (5) Die.

37. Hey!!!!!!!

38. Run a rape crisis center for farm animals.

39. Learn to BBQ pork ribs and sell em in the marketplace.

40. Teach a “How to keep You Tube from taking down your videos” workshop.

41. Judge a Draw mohammed cartoon contest.

42. Develop a true “goat scent” for moslem women.
    (not just washing them with goat urine)

43. Start a Donate Your Organs campaign.

44. PR for Chobani yogurt company

45. Pose for a Draw Mohammed cartoon.

46. Sell “Rainbow” flags.

47. Become an Apple Genius

48. Design the next Windows O/S

49. Learn photoshop from BFH. 😀

50. Make one of your wives (or daughters) sell blowjobs at IDF outposts.

51. Submit to the Capitalistic Imperialism of the Great Satan. Earn travel miles.

52. Become a Jew.

53. Drive-by shooter in Chicago.

54. Start a dating web site to match the jihadist up with the perfect cousin.

55. Smuggle cigarettes to NY City.

56. Murder American Ambassadors for the Clinton Foundation.

57. Set up a toll booth on America’s southern border.

58. Get kick backs from all the illegal alien invading rat-people you can get a city job in Chicago.

59. Drive truckloads of diseased mexican children to schools in Portland and Seattle.

60. Start eGoatHarmony.

61. Design and make “French Maid” outfits for goats.
    (complete with fishnet stockings)

62. Shoot your battle buddy in the fucking head.

63. Manufacture scanty lingerie for goats.
    (with crotchless panties)

64. MJA for the win!!

    “Run a rape crisis center for farm animals.”
    LOLOLOL!! I can’t stop laughing!!!

65. Come on, Tim, every farm boy knows the best things for goats and sheep are hip waders. Drop their back legs into the boots and all you have to do is stand there.

66. Open a “Folies-Bergère” bar in Mecca or Medina.
    (with goat can-can dancers)

67. I’m a suburbanite.

68. You wear Chevy truck parts?

69. Become lettuce head pickers.

70. Sky diving classes for gay guys.

71. Future Farmers of Allah Over A Chivas.

72. Open explosive sex toy boutiques.

73. Start a dingleberry removal service

74. Become an in-flight missile repairman.

75. Sceptic Tank/Land Fillers

76. Crash Test Dummies

77. Steeple Chase Hurdles

78. Football Blocking Dummies

79. Attack Dog Training Dummies

80. Open a gay wedding cake business.

81. Conduct workshops for female genital mutilation.

82. Banished Diseased Homo Living Love Dolls

83. #BetterIdeasForISIS Earn extra money by selling your kidneys. Marketing tip: double your money by selling both of them!

84. Sorry Farmwife, i didn’t see your post.

85. Fire Island Ferry Fenders

86. Floating Barrier Oil Spill Containment Boom

87. Boxing Gym Heavy Bags

88. Go suck a pulled pork sandwich.

89. Fuck Hillary Clinton.

90. Cap Michele’s Obama’s toxic tamale geyser and make a fortune in the unnatural gas industry.

91. They probably learned their dirty tricks from the Clintons/Obamas.