I don’t want to hear about world hunger – Not when I have to listen to South Florida radio – IOTW Report

I don’t want to hear about world hunger – Not when I have to listen to South Florida radio

Wednesday, 15 March 2017, 13:54 BFH Uncategorized 51

Keep your problems to yourself-  your loss of a job, your illness, your back pain – I had to listen to Jack FM and The Gator for the last few weeks.

There is no worse lot in life than having to endure this dreck for nearly a month. (I’ve been renovating a house late at night and the only thing that cuts the maddening silence is the maddening South Florida “rock” stations.)

Which concentration camp torturer founded Jack FM and The Gator?

I’m convinced both stations went into business because they went halfsies at a garage sale and bought Todd Shneck’s record collection.

Who is Todd Shneck? He’s that kid in high school who had only a passing interest in music, but had a car with a cassette deck. So he a box of tapes. And it all sucked.

With 10 guesses I can pretty much tell you what is being played on Jack FM right now.

-Eddie Money

-Steve Miller

– John Cougar

– Fleetwood Mac

-Billy Joel

-Pink Floyd

-Guns N’ Roses

-Journey

-The Who

-Bryan Adams

This goes on hour after hour, the same 50 friggin’ songs.

To make things worse, they “dangle a carrot” by saying, “we’re going to play a listener request. We’re going to play the winner of our poll. Listeners chose either Eddie Money’s “Take Me Home Tonight” or John Cougar’s “Small Town.”

Really? People are invested in this? They are biting their nails wondering which of these two crap songs “the people” want to hear?

They say the contest is made up from suggestions on their website, which is why I hate people.

What mouthbreathing shitsauce is going to the website and typing “me wanna hear “Behind Blue Eyes.” I no hear “Behind Blue Eyes” ’nuff”?

I don’t have to listen anymore, but it’s not enough. I might not be able to cope with the knowledge that this station is still in business. But what really sends me out of my mind is that two clicks over on the dial is a redundancy – The Gator. It’s Jack FM (which stands for, I am convinced, Jackass F*cking Moron) with a couple of different tunes thrown in once in awhile.

But when “Dancing Queen” is your refreshing respite, you know you’re in musical crisis.

/rant

 

 

51 Comments on I don’t want to hear about world hunger – Not when I have to listen to South Florida radio

  1. I hear your pain, BFH. When it comes to pop music of any style, here on the other Florida coast our situation is like yours…unless you tune in a Latino station. I’ve found that modern Latino pop is quite tolerable in general, and some of it is pretty good. “Traditional” or stereotypical stuff is insipid and boring and that’s not what I’m talking about. And although I speak passable Spanish, the DJs and commercials are too fast for me to really understand – and that’s a PLUS! Give it a try…

    Aside: it sure is interesting that the most common kind of business that buys ad time are personal injury lawyers.

  4. I went to a great concert last weekend, with some headliners including Richard Page of Mr. Mister. He played 3 songs: Broken Wings (not sure the actual title), Kyrie Eleison, and one he wrote after going solo. A friend who was also at the concert and is a big fan of his commented afterward that Richard supposedly hates playing those two over and over. But they are what people know, and what people want, so he has to play them.
    I like The Sound radio station better because at least they play more variety. But now I mostly listen to my playlist on the iPod.

  9. that’s the reason I don’t listen to Oldie stations anymore …. one more listen to Tom Petty’s whine & I just might lose it

    … even Robert Plant couldn’t stand to sing ‘Stairway To Heaven’ by 1980

  10. There used to be a nationwide oldies station on Saturdays nights. When the show started in the early ’80’s the host would play lots of different things. By the 2000’s though, he would tell people to call in with their requests. He added “The bigger a hit it is the more likely it is that I will play it.” In other words, “If it is one of the songs you will hear a dozen times a week on your oldies station then we will be happy to play it for you.”

    For a while he also had a show that played the top 10 songs from that particular week. One week he played the top 10 from 1970. One of the songs in the top 10 was “Whole Lotta Love” by Led Zeppelin. When he got to that spot on the countdown he said he was not going to play it because it was a song that most of the stations would not play. My only question was, “Then why did you pick 1970 as the year to feature this week if you were not going to play 10% of the songs on the countdown?”

    I used to be in radio. I hate what happened to it. They made it a terrible product but yet they can’t figure out why listenership (at least to music stations) is down.

  11. My company handed out the first iPods to all employees many years ago. I haven’t listened to radio since. Between Rush, Levin and Frank from Queens my hour-and-a-half on the road each workday, as well as my hour at the gym are uninterrupted audio pleasure. Then there are the thousands of songs on there and I love every one.

  12. The best oldies show I ever listened to was Pete McKay’s Nostalgic Rock in Denver in the 70s. He played everything and lots of trivia thrown in. It was Sundays, 8 or 9 AM to noon I think. Doctor Demento was great too Sunday night.

  13. I think REO Journey Wagon is coming out with a new album soon.

    Reminds me of working frontline record/tape retail in the Navy Exchange in Naples, Italy. An aircraft carrier group would come into port and hundreds of guys would ask stuff like,
    ‘what do you think of the latest album from Foreigner?’
    ‘Did you like the last one?’
    ‘YEAH!’
    ‘Then you’ll like this one.’

  15. Which brings me to a pet peeve of mine. Why is it so many contractors have to have a damn radio/CD on when they are at a customers house, (or even new construction) working? It’s usually set up, and loud enough for the whole crew to hear, which means anyone within a hundred yards can hear what is being played. Anyway, maybe I’m just a grump, but that pisses me off. I’m not too fond of little happy dogs either.

  20. As an old carpenter, the reasons for having a radio on is to drown out the sound from the air compressor, cycling on and on.
    Then there is the misery mitigation. It’s OK to freeze or bake if you can rock out.
    Then there is the fact that construction is inherently boring as hell.

  21. Fond memory: WHFS 102.3 FM in the Washington, DC market in the 70s. They played with highly individualistic DJs (Cerphe, Weasel, et al.) who selected their own music. They’d take phone requests but tell you (sometimes politely, sometimes not) to get lost if you asked for something the DJ didn’t like. They called it “alternative music” then but what they played frequently became generally popular a little while later: they were great judges of good music.

    The station got sold to the Arundel organization and didn’t take long to disappear. Sad.

  22. @Poor Lazlo – You reminded me of a couple of guys who replaced the duct-work in my attick a few months ago. They had a boom box up there and a handful of doo-wop CDs they’d made for themselves to sing along with. It was great to hear them up there in the Florida heat doing whatever was necessary for them to have a good time sweating their rear ends off. A plus was that they had decent voices and sense of harmony!

  24. This playing of “One Bad Apple” by the Osmond Brothers goes out to Glenn in Greenwich, CT, who has been inconsolable since his hemorrhoidectomy. Not only does his ass hurt, but his radio talk show is going down the tubes too. And… his wife is sleeping with the pool boy.

  25. Uncle Al
    We would also sing along. But with prurient intent and low brow gusto.
    I carried a Hod (long, long ago) for a stone mason who could instantly change the lyrics of any song into pure filth.
    Shinin’ Times

  26. I still cannot fathom that when Eddie Money called the legendary Ronnie Spector and said, “I’d like you to sing on Take Me Home Tonight” she didn’t hang up the phone.
    And, for the record, I love Tom Petty. But the guy has HUNDREDS of great songs. Play something other than those same three.
    Take heart, there is one real radio station left in America and you can get in online. It’s WFUV from Fordham University in The Bronx NY. Nothing is programmed. Everything from Elvis to Courtney Barnett. Especially great is Dennis Elsas and Corny’s show. Hardly any commercial interruption, too.
    I’ll be damned if a week doesn’t go by that I hear something I never heard that is so good I run to iTunes to get it.
    Only catch is: when their news comes on hit that mute button pronto. Remember, this is broadcast from a NYC university.

  29. @uncle al. WHFS Friday drive time set, played by Weasel, was outstanding. Great set up for the weekend.
    Rockin Rebels – Wild Weekend
    Eddie Cochran – Weekend
    Dave Edmunds – Here comes the weekend
    Joe “King” Carrasco – Party Weekend

    Then on to the Slickee Boys – When I go to the beach.
    The Flirts – We just want to dance

    Those were the days.

  30. Do you need a “safe space” because this is “triggering” you? Perhaps some extra nappy time? 😉

    (Sorry I could not resist comparing this torture to the snowflakes on college campuses. You know, the ones triggered by a scale in the gym or by the fact that bathrooms only come in two genders.)

  31. Wait – you have a live person on air with Jack FM?

    Then it’s worse here. It’s all pre-recorded. Often a riff on the fact they don’t do requests. It’s like a competition. People call in saying things like:

    “Don’t play any Lynard Synard, ok?”

    Then an announcer voice comes in: “OK”

    Then whatever drivel is up next plays.

    Most calls are attempts at jokes in this way. “Jack? I waited for you last night. I had to eat all the pizzas myself and I blame you for me being fat now.”

    How many times can I hear Love Shack and Bruno Mars’ Locked out of Heaven before they become another Edmund Fitzgerald torture-a-thon from the 70s?

    (Good grief they played that too much)

    I have the radio playing low in the living room. Seems like I can’t hear it when I work or sleep, but I catch myself at my desk going along with a song in my head only to find out it’s playing on the other side of the house.

    Not sure, but that trick night have come from tuning out a particularly aggravating person some time ago.

  35. @ Uncle Al – attick

    lol. When the correction is exactly the same as the mistake – I would stop trying to correct it also. 🙂

    Hate when I do that. Whoever I’m texting gets a great laugh at the ensuing mis-corrections, though.

  36. I used to think I would never get sick of hearing Pink Floyd.
    But I did.
    And there are thousands more.
    Many stations are playing the same crap now that I got sick of hearing literally 40 years ago.

  37. yeah, I don’t miss “The Gator” one damn bit. Hated that station when I lived in The Pizzle Fo Shizzle (BFH’s current home town PSL).

    But now I get to listen to the mellow tunes of 90.7 WWOZ in New Orleans. They even have an all-FrenchSpeaking cajun zydeco program on Sundays from noon til 2pm. I have friends on Fiji in French Polynesia that live-stream it. Laissez les bons temp roullez!

  39. **Trigger Warning: Scent-y-mental imagery

    @Uncle Al

    Yes, Yes. Take a little trip…
    …in that loud promo spot DJ voice…
    “WWDCFM DC-101 Washingtons ONLY Rock and Roll radio station”
    Q-107, FM-105 Whole Albums after 10PM.
    I heard the Air Florida call live.
    ‘Springfield Stories’. Some doozies.

    @BFH

    Nothing wrong with those Artists. Well, Eddie Money and Bryan Adams could cut like a knife, but it feels so right.
    50 friggin’ songs over and over is a Bot Broadcast Station.
    The Owner plus one employee (usually the wife) to handle all the regulatory paperwork and Ad buys.

    Speaking of ‘Springfield Stories’ Florida style, mid-90s.
    Did you ever catch on late night ‘local’ cable a show
    called “Blue Lights’? It was early “Cops” with a VHS cam.
    During the daytime hours they ran early QVC style peddlers.
    Baseball Cards and Knife collections. Shit you knot.
    Imagine Jack FM and The Gator hawking knives and cards.
    Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!

    Gotta Love It.

    **end Trigger

  40. I used to do FM quality testing. With about 6dB of dynamic range, FM audio is so over-compressed these days it leaves no room for quality. Internet radio audio can be better, depending on the available bit rate, and there are a lot of choices. When it comes to talk and other genres like old time radio, there are many podcasts to pick and choose from.

  41. You (young)Punks know nothing of misery…

    In 1984 We rented a Jeepney outside of Clark AB in the PI.

    Booze, Hookers , (and some stuff I would never mention while in Uniform)

    We get way up in the mountains out of Radio range and the driver has two Cassettes …John Cougars “American Fool” and Supertramp’s ” Crime of the Century”

    Gotta hear those two for about 7 hours…He would just rotate them…

    Luckily the monotony was broken up by the “New Peoples Army” (Commies) who after roughing us up let us go because we were lowly E-3’s and too drunk to kidnap

    and the Gator sucks ass

  42. I remember listening to WIOT FM in Toledo in the early 70’s. They used to play all the big rock songs of the day, from the Beatles to Zappa and everything in between. On Sundays they played albums (both sides) uninterrupted. Commercials, on any day or night) were few and far between. The DJ would play the music, talk about it a bit, and on to the next one. Those really were the days.

  43. You can always get a free Pandora or Slacker internet radio station, customized to your liking. If you want to pay for less ads, you can always do that. Have had both, free, for close to 10 years now, always available except in places with shit wifi, and can even stream through your phone if you don’t mind the battery drain. (I have unlimited data, so YMMV). These will ensure you hear only what you want, can banish what you dislike. I’ve not heard a single song from Jodeci or Madonna in years – it’s glorious.

  44. @ Uncle Al- WHFS was awesome, was a fan of the Greaseman on DC101 until they kicked him off, I think I was in the 9th grade when that happened. The rock stations in this area now suck, they claim to play the new rock but last I checked, Nirvana went away around 1995….strange. Sometimes I get 98 Rock out of Baltimore, not too bad but still sucks compared to internet radio. Satellite is largely looped programming, found that out on a long trip when Nina Blackwood started going through the same spiel and songs that were on 2 hours earlier started again.

  45. I got tired of the same old crap in my 30’s so I started listening to jazz. It takes a while to get it. There is a ton of crap out there so I take the bad with the good.

    Time flies, that was 25 years ago.

  46. January 1977. Traveling from California to D.C. In a uhaul truck with all my worldly goods. Day after day of one radio station fading out and another fading in.
    All playing the Eagles Hotel California.

    I never hated a song as much. Other than the Joe Walsh guitar solo.

  50. lol, great thread … due to all the DC area fans … junior high was WPGC w/ Harv Moore & the Redhead …. graduated to HFS in the early ’70’s & DC101 w/ Howard Stern & then the Greaseman …. good times for radio
    today …. thank God for podcasts, MP3 players, Chris Plante & Rush Limbaugh

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