New York Times Ask Dem Candidates Which Celebrity They Would Most Like To Bang

Diogenes’ Middle Finger:

It’s just a week until the Iowa vote and the Democrat primary field will soon narrow to just 30 or so candidates. They’ve spent hours at Democratic debates most of us didn’t watch droning on about screwing up your health care or their thrilling plans to tax the hell outta you so they can give you everything for free. As we mercifully get ready to say goodbye to some, let’s learn a little bit about them as people who occasionally like us get horny.

The New York Times asked some of the remaining Democrat candidates 20 questions, one of which was to give voters a peek into their mental Cinemax and reveal their celebrity crushes. I think the answers will thrill you. They may shock you. They might even horrify you. MORE HERE

19 Comments on New York Times Ask Dem Candidates Which Celebrity They Would Most Like To Bang

  1. Well, yeah, ’cause at the end of a long, hard day of turning around the economy, taxing people, doling out pallets of cash and whatnot — a president needs to retreat into reveries about their fav celeb crush, right?

  2. These are questions for idiots like obama. Anyone else should be too embarrassed by the stupidity of them to dignify them with an answer.

  3. Ask Bernie. He’ll want clarification as to if the person must be living.

    Because a corpse won’t be repulsed by his breath and dandruff.

  4. I’ll spill the cream.

    Petey B’s celebrity crush is any male celebrity who packs a fudge punch.

  5. Come on, is this a Babylon Bee piece? I don’t think even Harvey Weinstein would have sex with Lizzy or Man Hands Amy. (Amy does know Prince is dead right?)

    So if they asked them if they were a tree, what kind of tree would they be and Warren, Sanders and Biden answered truthfully, would they say one from the Petrified Forest in Arizona?

  6. I hoid Lizzy has a four year lease on Hillary’s fur-lined cod piece and Pete’s coming out with a candle that smell like his vagina…

  7. They should ask big Mike and hill. With no warnings in advance. That would be interesting. Everybody knows that’s what it takes to run the country is who you want to bonk.

  8. it’s what nytimes readers want to read.

    about how their candidate wants to plug another dude in the bunghole.


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