It’s oval vs round and Jesse Kelly has uh… well, 3 reasons why he hates round toilets.
I’ll let him explain.
The Curse of Round Toilet
30 Comments on The Curse of Round Toilet
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The only round toilet I remember seeing is a circular hole in the floor in China.
Ah! Curse you, tiny toilet!
I’m 6’1″ and 260#. I’ll crap in the bushes before I’ll squat on a round commode.
Elongated,the only way to go!
I need room to bloom!
I’ve never been privy to that.
Well, I guess my complaints will be directed towards more lofty problems.
I’m happy to have a flusher.
Toilet? What’s that?
I’m sorry, but First World Problem!
In many countries, the brown dust that settles everywhere, gets in everything and is inhaled by all creatures contains a high concentration of open-air toileting. $hit just dries up and blows around everywhere. This is a very common condition for folks outside the Western World. Be thankful for proper sanitation, be it oval, round, or upright.
I guess you never had to use bomb sights?
When I lived in Kabul the safe house had bomb sights in the middle of the bathroom and a urinal on the wall. The hot water heater was in the corner and a shower nozzle was on the wall opposite the urinal. Total tile room where it all drained into the bomb sight.
Tsquared- Oh my goodness! Ack!
Jesse Kelly was in Iraq but I don’t remember him mentioning the toilets where he was.
Call me ELONGO BOY, but comfort height.
Low height toilets are terrible too.
When I moved in to my house the toilets were low and were square.
Plumber replaced them all with elongated comfort height.
Recliners not yet available.
Drink holders, remote TV control holders. I’m waiting.
This from a guy who has just gone through the colonoscopy purge on Thursday.
Japanese thought of bum washers.
Americans never conquered the keister conundrum.
Anybody can pee on the floor.
Be a man and shit on the ceiling!
@PHenry — I think it was actually the French who invented the bidet. The Japanese turned them into an art form. I’ve got two in our house and have come to really dislike using anything else.
First world problem? Yes, to be sure, but I LIVE IN THE FIRST WORLD, thank the Lord. I’ve lived and traveled overseas and know the difference. Especially compared to the time I spent in rural Korea away from military quarters, where this morning’s crap is tomorrow’s rice paddy fertilizer.
For those plumbers who may have to install genderless restrooms I advise them to redesign urinals so that the ladies can use them too.
They need to be much lower to the ground and round shaped, or maybe oval shaped to accommodate the bigger men as well as the ladies. The weaker sex can sit on them rather than stand up, an awkward proposition for a lady. Their delicate nature requires them to sit down and do their fluid oriented business in a more dignified manner than odoriferous men, who often have poor aim standing at urinals with the result of many foul-smelling puddles on the floor, a nightmare for the janitors.
I think the concept is sound and we could call the new machine/device the uh…..uh…..THE TOILET!
Sitzpinklers, the bloody lot of you.
Another pet peeve.
Trouser zippers are too short. Newer trousers have a zipper about two or three inches too short. You have to un button and lower them to pis.
Haven’t seen one of those for a while. Someone keeps pooping my pants.
I bought 3 elongated, institution height, 4us gallon per flush American Standards 1 year before they were outlawed in Toronto. (+20 years)
They Flush with the authority of 33 pounds of water shooting the turds out to the street like a 12 gauge.
Blackie
The Boner
Mr. Grey
Just use you pants.
Wave em around in the air. Like a shotgun.
A double Barrel.
That’s all you need.
Your Pants.
I hate Dem tiny toilets.
My Junk be hangin over da edge when I sit and I pees on da floor.
And my asses be all around da seat like cheese on a burger.
Any guy who owns an RV can relate to this.
Why don’t they make really tall toilets? They could be called stool height.
You guys! 😂
The hell. I just wish they were about two inches deeper so my junk would not end up in the water every time I sit down on one to take a crap.
My grandson was visiting. He was about 10. He comes up to me and almost whispers “Papa, do you have any tongs?”
“Why do you need tongs?”
“In the bathroom”
Turns out, he’s ejected a humongous load and it won’t flush. The water is within a half inch of overflow condition brown.
I retrieve our super-blaster plunger and show him how it’s done. That’s what grandpas do.
I work in a very, eh, “international” workplace, with all the worst toliet habits and body sanitation (or lack thereof) from South to East to most Islamic countires. As a consequence, I have learned to perform all necessary bodily functions without ever actually sitting on the toilet when playing an “Away” game. I’m pushing 60 with incipient prostate issues, so it’s squat and fire torpedoes, wipe, then chase it with the golden stream from a standing position.
After flushing a minimum of three times, of course, prior to the bombing run. You get some splash from elevation, and it’s preferable if it’s not used water.
AFTER putting the seat up. I’m not using it anyway, plus its decorated with urine splashes, liquid from impromptu Muslim dick washing, and occasional blood spatters from the gonorrhea infected versions of same, so its just a nasty, infected obstacle at this point. Take care not to contact the underside behind you, tho, it’s usually also contaminated with urine and diarrhea drips.
Also, use toilet paper to temporarily disable the photo eye on the auto flusher. It’s a noble idea among cultures who don’t know how to flush and young men who won’t, but from a squat you get unintentional activations that can create unwanted splashing. Best to avoid this with a bit of preplanning.
So it matters not to me what the road toilet is, I ain’t sitting on it anyway.
But this means I want some COMFORT at HOME, so it’s tear drop sitters all ’round for my throned comfort and convenience, as I rule Down Low from On High…
Didn’t know shitting was so complicated.
^^^^ picking the right gender bathroom is worse
^^^
Ahhh the First World. It was nice while we had it