Patriot Retort: How much you wanna bet that more people are talking about Eric Swalwell blasting out a loud one on MSNBC than are talking about Adam Schiff’s impeachment inquiry? Shart Twitter is the best Twitter. And, man, was last night entertaining.
Harmeet Dhillon referred to the clip of Eric’s on-air gas-passing as his “Fartacus Moment.” But since that fart of his probably required a change of underwear, I think Shartacus is probably more accurate.
Okay, for those who don’t know: A “shart” is a fart that ends up being a shit.
Come on, you know what I’m talking about. It happens to everyone at some point. You’re expecting to pass a little gas and your colon has other plans so what you end up with is a shart.
And there is no way Eric’s star turn on MSNBC was just a little gas. No way.
Of course Shartacus is denying he cut the cheese.
But of course he is. As the old saying goes, “He who denies it supplies it.” more
AND…
I DONT THINK IT WAS SWALLWELL..I SUSPECT CHRIS ASSTHEWS!!
At least he knows how to cut a “Howitzer” in front of a “Fake News” reporter. Kind of sums up the Impeachment crap as well. Just one huge FART!!!
Shartacus! His legacy is written in stone,…. or skid marks.
Along with the other old saying that goes, “He who smelt it dealt it.”
Yep, that wuz a real mudslapper!
I knew they were barking rats, but that wuz rediculous!
Good thing he wasn’t near an open flame!
https://media1.tenor.com/images/3960c2b795a8dd13034ce5f665378182/tenor.gif?itemid=13364850
MSNBC or Swalwell tried to say that it was someone sliding a mug across the desk and the mic picked it up. Riiiiight.
In the cosmically unlikely even I am ever interviewed by Matthews, I would be proud — PROUD — to let rip a flutterblast like Swalwell’s. It would express in a way I simply couldn’t express in words the depth of my respect for Matthews and his ilk, and the whole professional nooz world for that matter.
Here is msnbc trying to cover for swalwell.
https://kfiam640.iheart.com/content/2019-11-19-congressman-denies-farting-loudly-on-live-tv-interview-msnbc-responds/
Eric Fartswell
… or if you prefer, Shartswell
Yay! Farts! Finally, an ‘issue’ the public can grasp coming from our political class.
Sweet Jeebus, if you’ve got that big meteor hanging around, now is the time.
Of course he denied it…..liberals DO NOT admit facts.
Swalwell’s an ass.
Draw your own conclusion
The Fact that Swalwell’s Farts can still make noise after the Pounding
His Bunghole has received is a tribute to Modern Medicine .
Ironically, that was the most intelligent thing he’s ever said.
I thought it was an angry rhino attacking….
He probably ate a whole cabbage that afternoon
Look at his teeth
Cabbage teeth if I ever saw them
Looks like Swallwell did it again; he mega-farted during today impeachment hearing
Whereupon an annoyed Adam Schifweasel pounded his gavel and said “One more outburst like that and I will be forced to clear the Star Chamber”
His fart sounded like Chasten was pulling out of Mayor Pete’s ass. I think I’m gonna be sick… 🤢
From the great kids book Squids Will Be Squids by Jon Scieszka and Lane Smith, Fresh Morals, Beastly Fables the story He Who… Skunk, Musk Ox and cabbage were sitting around the front porch at Skunk’s house. Slowly but surely, the porch filled with a terrible smell. “Whoa!” said Skunk. “Is that you musk Ox?” Musk Ox shook his shaggy head. “No way, Skunk. That’s Cabbage.” “Uh uh,” said Cabbage, “That’s not me.” Musk Ox and Cabbage looked back at Skunk, who suddenly became very interested in tying his shoe. Moral, he who smelt it dealt it.
The Nature of the Beast…release a test fart…we saw subterfugeee!
From the Master, George Carlin:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1GsA3KiPYk
Take a small bowel he said!!
And known to have said as well…
“Farts are fun! Farts are shit without the mess!”
Poor Eric Smellwell. This toot shall pass.
Go Big. Be Bold. Good god. Crack a window.
My dad, God rest his soul, would ask, in those closed window car winter rides…”HEY, who let go??” SBD’s you see, a nice lingering one.
Also, will never forget when my autistic brother ripped one in church 40 years ago…may God bless him too, he’s gone.
My Italian father in law used to say, may HE also ‘RIP’, “that’s good, that means the plumbing is working”.
Thanks for the memories!
We used to refer to farts as barking spiders. I had a friend who thought that was the funniest thing he’d ever heard.
Reminds me of the old joke about the day Achmed farted in the marketplace.
He didn’t cut the cheese. He baked a brownie.
Nothing to see here it was just swamp gas
He was told by Pelosi to go out there and “Slip one for the Shiffer” to take the spotlight of the Impeachment Inquiry that is starting to auger in.
Beans beans the magical fruit
The more you eat the more you toot
the more you toot the better you feel
so lets have beans in every meal.
Where every you be let you wind blow free
If you don’t toot your own horn no one else will
Someone step on a duck?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QwIdyQzQ5mc
ouchie cabaza, my eyes are burning.
Shart we used to call that a turkey squirt
turkey squirt
the process of accidentally squirting anal juices instead of the intended gas.
guy 1 “Ey bro listen to this!……O-Oh Shit.”
guy 2 “What was that!?”
guy 1 “i just turkey squirted”
Well, it appears Rep Thunder in the Valley, is at least smart enough to now wear brown clothes, set on a brown saddle, and ride a brown horse.
Swallowell left the interview with a pall of fumes trailing behind that was actually visible to the naked eye. Stagehands fled in panic like a grenade was just lobbed amid them.
The disgusting slob couldn’t even get a cab.
Swallwell nuked himself!
I LEAVE this site this afternoon- all is well and clean- AND I RETURN HOURS LATER TO FIND OUT THIS???
Oi vey.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=No8wNBqn4RI
Maybe he thought he was in a Mel Brooks movie….