You call that an anthem?? – IOTW Report

You call that an anthem??

Some Hollywood guy named Glen Whitman wrote an anthem for the country that would be formed by the secession of the western states – Pacifica.

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Ever since November 8th, my wife has been semi-seriously advocating the idea of “Pacifica,” a new nation composed of CA, OR, WA, HI, and parts of NV. When I asked my wife what she wanted for Christmas, she said she wanted me to compose a national anthem for Pacifica. I’m not totally sold on Pacifica myself, but when your beloved makes a request that clear, you pay attention. So I filed it away, never mentioning it, but secretly working on it. On Christmas Day, she was surprised and pleased to find this in her stocking:

“Pacifica”
(to the tune of “America, the Beautiful”)

Let’s break away, the whole West Coast
To flee from you-know-who.
We’ll take the states we love the most
We’ll take Las Vegas, too!
Pacifica! Pacifica! A land that’s (mostly) free!
We’ll smoke some weed, get gay-marr-ied
And save de-moc-ra-cy!

The Union was a grand ideal
A pure and righteous thing
But now we need to break the seal —
A conscious un-coup-ling!
America! America! It’s time to call it quits.
But don’t you cry, it’s not goodbye —
We’re friends with benefits!

The Constitution, we adored —
America’s contract.
But now it doth resemble more
A suicidal pact!
America! Pacifica! We’re codependent, see?
We need some “me-time” for ourselves —
And you need therapy!

From San Diego to San Juan
And all the wine country,
With Google and with Amazon,
We’ll do just fine, you’ll see!
Pacifica! Pacifica! A new road we have found.
You’ll find us on the PCH
Always — with — the — top — down

HT/ Zonga

I have one—->

Sung to the tune of the Star Spangled Banner-

Jose can you pee, on my neighbor’s and not my tree.

Gay pridely we wail at the twilight’s last reaming.

Whose broad-shouldered bright stars, thru the glamorous night.

O’er the man parts we watched were so fabulously gleaming.

And the docket we share, with the sexy au pair,

80 proof, through the night, and our fag is still there.

Oh, say does that star spangled manor yet rave

O’er the land of “it’s all free,” and the home

of the depraved.

 

 

23 Comments on You call that an anthem??

  1. How bout letting the sane vote the following off the Island; drug addled, liberals, welfare freaks, criminals, homos, professors, illegals, Hollywood idiots, San Francisco weirdos, lofos, and other gummit leech types? Put them all on a newly constructed island, like China just built.

  2. When India partitioned there was an awful lot of blood shed as Muslims tried to make their way to Pakistan and Hindus to India.

    I’m not sure progressives in the other 44 states would have the ambition to move to their new homeland, but I know the overlords of Pacifica will have to put up their own Iron Curtain to keep the productive trapped (and paying) for their utopia.

    History rhyming.

  3. Let them have their Pacifica…right after my mom gets the rest of her belongings out of California and into her new home n Texas. That should take place by the beginning of next summer.

  4. California, there I go
    Back to the land of ice and snow
    Where bowers of flowers
    Are frozen till spring
    But proggtard assholes
    Dont run everything
    A corn fed gal says “Dont be late”
    That is why I just cant wait
    To take it to the Interstate
    California, there I go

  5. … a quick, not-too-well thought-out….

    ‘Kailphornia’

    I’m really butthurt that you don’t worship me
    And this is the Land of Liberty?

    From San Francisco’s urine-soaked corridors,
    To LA’s porn-soaked whores and more.
    We invited the ‘Undocumented’ Gangs and Cartels that are just next door
    But feel safer because more Gun Control is the defense de jour.

    Upon the beaches of Malibu,
    where the sea air makes an echo through our ears
    We fight against totalitarian America
    by committing Fascism against our peers

    I’m really butthurt that you don’t worship me
    And this is the Land of Liberty?

  6. There’s something that I wish someone would clear up about this modern secession movement! If the Calimoronicans actually ever do secede, will the current US government follow precedent and invade them, starting a destructive war and then, after defeating them, maintain troops there overseeing their punishment for disobedience or maybe in a more modern procedure, set up reeducation camps in the Mohave for ten years or so. If so, I can’t wait for that last part.

  7. I find it interesting that anytime American patriots talk about succession it’s illegal; ‘we fought a war about it!’ But when marxists talk about succession, it’s A-O-K.

    Funny that.

  8. Difficult to get exercised over the secession of the communist bloc.

    Good bye
    Farewell
    Adieu
    Au Revoir
    Auf Wiedersehen
    So Long
    See Ya!
    gehen und in einen Eimer Scheiße

    izlamo delenda est …

  9. As long as San Diego doesn’t go with ! were actually still sane down here.
    It’s the transplants that make us look bad not Natives.in the 80’s liberal Eastern Dandy’s infiltrated the whole State. This really upset our common sense way of life.

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