Brazilian president says country must reduce numbers of penis amputations – IOTW Report

Brazilian president says country must reduce numbers of penis amputations


“In Brazil, we have 1,000 penis amputations a year due to a lack of water and soap,” he said while speaking to reporters in Brasilia after visiting the Education Ministry. “We have to find a way to get out of the bottom of this hole.”


ht/ supernightshade

29 Comments on Brazilian president says country must reduce numbers of penis amputations

  1. …based on what I’ve seen of Turd World “hygiene” practises at my plant, I’d say that’s likely a LOW estimate. Urinal water is considered sufficient for all your washing needs, used toilet paper is flung in the corrner if it is used at all (BFH has a picture of this), people stand in the seat because that’s how it works in the mother country…and that’s BEFORE you get to exclusively Muslim practices like blowing snot all over the sink and flushing with the hand that has his social disease blood on it after washing his dingus in the aforementioned urinal water.

    …also, we probably don’t see this so much HERE, even among our troubled populations, because our medicine is better than theirs.

    For NOW.

    The more socialized we get, the more likely there won’t be money or skill to deal with this, and the more likely it will become a “thing” HERE.

    …although if dick amputations were to become a thing in Somalisota or Dearbornistan, maybe not so bad in THOSE places…

  2. …bear in mind, this is INVOLUNTARY penisectomies. Cutting your schwantz off because you think you’ll do better in women’s sports hasn’t really caught on across the beaches of Ipanema yet…

  3. “We have to find a way to get out of the bottom of this hole.” Poor choice of words, maybe the reason for all the dick amputations (Chopadickoffofme) is they’re poking it in the wrong hole. Or they’re creating a lot of eunuchs and trannies for some unknown reason.

  4. I don’t see this as an issue, you don’t need a penis to have a successful career working at a machine shop.

    Oh, wait…

    One morning I was called to the emergency room by the head ER nurse. She directed me to a patient who had refused to describe his problem other then to say that he “needed a doctor who took care of men’s troubles.” The patient, about 40, was pale, febrile, and obviously uncomfortable, and had little to say as he gingerly opened his trousers to expose a bit of angry red and black-and-blue scrotal skin.
    After I asked the nurse to leave us, the patient permitted me to remove his trousers, shorts, and two or three yards of foul-smelling, stained gauze wrapped about his scrotum, which was swollen to twice the size of a grapefruit and extremely tender. A jagged zig-zag laceration, oozing pus and blood, extended down the left scrotum.

    Amid the matted hair, edematous skin, and various exudates, I saw some half-buried dark linear objects and asked the patient what they were. Several days earlier, he replied, he had injured himself in the machine shop where he worked, and had closed the laceration himself with a heavy-duty stapling gun. The dark objects were one-inch staples of the type used in putting up wallboard.

    We x-rayed the patients scrotum to locate the staples; admitting him to the hospital; and gave him tetanus antitoxin, a broad-spectrum antibacterial therapy, and hexachlorophene sitz baths prior to surgery the next morning.

    The procedure consisted of exploration and debridement of the left side of the scrotal pouch. Eight rusty staples were retrieved, and the skin edges were trimmed and freshened. The left testis had been avulsed and was missing. The stump of the spermatic cord was recovered at the inguinal canal, debrided, and the vessels ligated properly, though not much of a hematoma was present. Through-and through Penrose drains were sutured loosely in site, and the skin was loosely closed.

    Convalescence was uneventful, and before his release from the hospital less then a week later, the patient confided the rest of his story to me.

    An unmarried loner, he usually didn’t leave the machine shop at lunchtime with his co-workers. Finding himself alone, he had begun the regular practice of masturbating by holding his penis against the canvas drive-belt of a large floor-based piece of running machinery. One day, as he approached orgasm, he lost his concentration and leaned too close to the belt. When his scrotum suddenly became caught between the pulley-wheel and the drive-belt, he was thrown into the air and landed a few feet away. Unaware that he had lost his left testis, and perhaps too stunned to feel much pain, he stapled the wound closed and resumed work.

    I can only assume he abandoned this method of self-gratification.

    By Dr. William A. Morton, Jr. MD, a retired urologist residing in West Chester, Pennsylvania

  5. LOL, I remember reading in Judicial Watch’s site about a million bucks of Obama’s failed stimulus funding going to teaching African males how to clean their penises. Priorities.

  6. WDS
    “LOL, I remember reading in Judicial Watch’s site about a million bucks of Obama’s failed stimulus funding going to teaching African males how to clean their penises.”

    …It’s only funny until you realize he spent the REST of the “stimulus” bringing MORE African penises HERE…

  7. A man that lacks water and soap goes to his doctor.

    “Doctor, you have to help me. My penis is extremely swollen and discolored”

    The doctor takes a look and tells the man an amputation is required. Horrified the man leaves and seeks a second opinion, then a third, then a fourth. Each time the same opinion.

    Lost and desperate he seeks out a Chinese medicine man. The man takes a long look at the penis and says:”your penis does not need to be amputated, Brazilian doctors just want your money. Dick will fall off all by itself in a few weeks.”

  8. Methinks early circumcision would help alleviate some of this… Just guessing and I also realize that if there is not plentiful soap and clean water the problem is not simply personal hygiene.
    and @ old_oaks, YOW!

  9. Q: What do people, who have a clue and live without much water, do to their dick?
    A: Circumcision
    It’s easy to keep your nasty dick clean when you shower every morning, harder if you wonder;
    Do I have enough water to make tea?

  10. As mentioned by others the best way out of this mess is circumcision at birth being the norm except if specifically forbidden by the parents. Hell, don’t even tell them or put it in the fine print. It may be worthwhile to see whether a program of circumcision for adults who have a recurring infection problem would be cost effective.

  11. Brazil has hundreds of miles of coastline. What about going to the beach for a skinny dip – Salt water is better than doing nothing to get clean. It’s also cheap and abundant.

  12. Modern leftist feminism os one giant penis amputation. Just look at hollywood idiots fashionably raising their children with sexual gender abuse. (And child abuse is what it is.)


  13. I watched a documentary on Mongolia a while back, and that country is also extremely arid. The woman with children had so little water that she would take some in her mouth and spit it on her child to keep it clean. Don’t think water is so scarce that this wouldn’t be an option. One or two mouthfuls should be enough to keep a penis clean. But I could be wrong.


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