Michelle Obama Talks Intimately About Her Reproductive System

SeattleTimes-

Michelle Obama says she felt “lost and alone” after suffering a miscarriage 20 years ago and she and Barack Obama underwent in vitro fertilization to conceive their two daughters.

“We were trying to get pregnant and it wasn’t going well,” Mrs. Obama, 54, writes in her upcoming memoir. “We had one pregnancy test come back positive, which caused us both to forget every worry and swoon with joy, but a couple of weeks later I had a miscarriage, which left me physically uncomfortable and cratered any optimism we felt.”

The Associated Press purchased an early copy of “Becoming,” Mrs. Obama’s memoir and one of the most avidly anticipated political books in recent memory. In it, she writes of being alone to administer herself shots to help hasten the process. Her “sweet, attentive husband” was at the state legislature, “leaving me largely on my own to manipulate my reproductive system into peak efficiency.”

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45 Comments on Michelle Obama Talks Intimately About Her Reproductive System

  1. This makes sense. Gaybama wasn’t interested in Big Mike’s nappy so they made some test tube babies, chopped through the underbrush and planted them in her at-risk community.

    Voila! I present to you a Family Man and not just another femboy and his beard.




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  2. Was Mike having erectile issues? Didn’t he try Viagra?

    Oops……my mistake, that was before the “blue pill” came along.




    7
  3. “TMI Moochelle. This woman’s existence is so vapid this is what she fills up her million dollar memoir.”

    …I agree with everything you say, @anonymous, except for the “woman” part…




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  4. Always knew s(he) getting pregnant required some kind of reproductive ass(istance) by somebody.

    Who were the surogate parents?




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  5. She offers no hope for all the women out there who were born with a penis instead of a vagina. Very insensitive.




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  6. “Her insides were a rocky place where my seed could find no purchase.”

    @H. I. McDonough, that has to be the oddest description of a transvestite man’s rectum I’ve EVER seen…




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  7. We were trying everything to get pregnant. Every evening I sent him into the bathroom with a stack of fag porn and after ten minutes he was supposed to come out and throw it at me from across the room but every time I spread my legs the poor thing almost died from freight.




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  8. Someone must have a dna sample and this is setting the narrative, “ but of course the dna will not match “




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  9. Like everything the treasonous gay Kenyan commie and his, whatever, say, this too is pure fiction. No way in hell are those girls related to big Mike and Barry the fairy.




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  10. Wait a minute — I thought progs and other abortion-supporters insist that abortion is OK because its only the removal of a bunch of cells that have no life? So why should she get any more depressed about miscarriage than about having her normal period?




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  11. Which hole was used for the insemination and subsequent birth of the 0bama children? The front hole or the back hole? Can the Left explain this for us?




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  12. But seriously, I can thank God for the advances in science and medicine, courtesy of the White Patriarchy, that made this possible for the 0bamas.




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  13. I’m confused.

    I didn’t think that a dude could get a dude pregnant.

    I guess I’m too old to understand this world anymore.




    7
  14. Her “sweet, attentive husband” was at the state legislature, “leaving me largely on my own to manipulate my reproductive system into peak efficiency.”

    Wow, there’s so much twisted psychosis going on in that statement…it’s incredible.
    At least one conclusion can be made about that delusional thought. Barry preferred to go hunting in man country rather than assisting his hermaphrodite “wife” in a fruitless attempt to get pregnant.

    Afraid to venture into the idea of manipulating a reproductive system into peak efficiency. Is Big Mike actually a robot?




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  15. “The Associated Press purchased an early copy of “Becoming,” Mrs. Obama’s memoir and one of the most avidly anticipated political books in recent memory.”

    So, which is it, AP – memoir or political book?

    I choose “C” – neither. A fabrication on the order of Mrs. Clinton’s latest foray into fiction, “It Was EVERYBODY ELSE’S Fault!”




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  16. Pictures or it didn’t happen.

    I mean pictures of the happy Sasquatch when she finally started growing the demon seeds. Most women have pictures of their pregnancies, especially if they had a very hard time conceiving, because they’re happy to finally be having a child.

    I just don’t believe her.




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  17. There should be some sort of legislation passed forbidding “Obama”, “intimately”, and “reproductive system” from ever being combined in one sentence.




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  18. thanks to this website, a national Treasure, I have not laughed this hard in years reading all these responses about Big Mike!




    7
  19. I want her to tell us why she thought it was okay to waste so many tax dollars on super-lavish first-class vacations.
    Why she flew separately in Air Force Two, within hours, to the same location as Air Force One.
    Etc.




    4
  20. I call foul!

    They tried soooo hard to get pregnant but of course, we would not want their child to be “punished with a baby”.

    When you lie all the time you just can’t remember what you lied about. So confusing.




    2
  21. TO AVOID THE WHOLE TRANNY ISSUE….

    Michelle and her lawyers cook up some wacky story involving her non-existent lady parts, get sympathy, and then distract people from her adopted kids.




    3
  22. At the next book signing, ask the Worst Lady if she’s familiar with the names ANITA BLANCHARD and MARTIN NESBITT.

    Seriously. Ask her.




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