Toilet Paper Hoarder Stuck With 4,800 Rolls – IOTW Report

Toilet Paper Hoarder Stuck With 4,800 Rolls

Supermarket boss refuses refund for hoarder who tried to return 4,800 toilet rolls and 150 bottles of hand sanitiser

The Sun – AN AUSTRALIAN supermarket boss has told how he refused a hoarder’s attempt to return 4,800 toilet rolls and 150 bottles of hand sanitiser.

The shopper had stockpiled the supplies when the coronavirus outbreak began and was no longer able to sell it.

John-Paul Drake, director at Drakes Supermarkets in South Australia, posted a video to his YouTube channel about his anger toward the hoarder.

In his video, he said: “2020 – the year of toilet paper. The scenes that everyone has seen with the toilet paper have been absolutely ridiculous.”

Finish reading and watch the video here.

21 Comments on Toilet Paper Hoarder Stuck With 4,800 Rolls

  1. He must have put in 200 and not 2, into that toilet paper calculator counter, he hit enter and was in such a rush, a PanDEMic Panic, he did not really debate it…

    Speaking of which, if you REALLY want to do real calibration, write the date for a new roll on the inside of the cardboard roll with a fresh start.

    Check date…when finished.

    4
  2. We had a fresh 24 pack of Scotts 1-ply 1100 sheets per roll that we bought around middle of January before this whole nonsense started. For a family of 4 and we’re about 1/2 way thru it as of now. I don’t suspect we’ll need to buy any before this bullshit is all over with. Scotts is the only brand I’ve used my entire life.

    Guests laugh at us for getting the “cheap stuff,” well who’s laughing now assholes? Why pay premium for something you just flush anyhow?

    4800 rolls of Scotts would last our family of 4 about 100 years.

    11
  3. The best substitute for toilet paper I had seen as a child was a very old couple (relatives) who kept two personal wash rags each (like tooth brushes) plus several other pairs (for guests).

    One was used for the first wipe (after wetting it). The second was for fine cleaning. Then, wash both in the sink (soap optional) when finished and use again.

    Saved me from no toilet paper at their home and it really cleaned better than toilet paper. For a child, it was just something I had to learn.

    5
  4. He’ll be forced to use them all. He could market himself as having the cleanest ass this side of Uranus. He’ll appear on the Ellen and Oprah shows.

    Ellen: So tell the audience all your secret ass-wipe strategies.
    Mr. Clean-ass: Well Ellen, I use an entire roll for every dump I take.
    Ellen: That’s admirable. What else?
    Mr. Clean-ass: Every swipe is done with two huge handfulls of TP. Like a switch-hitter, right hand swab, followed by a left-hand swab. Then, two more fistfulls of TP and do it all over again. For variety, sometimes I’ll start with my left hand.
    Ellen: Interesting! Does your toilet ever get plugged?
    Mr. Clean-ass: Sigh. Yes, almost every day. When I flush, I keep yelling “Titanic” hoping it’ll all go down.
    Ellen: Do you do anything special to get rid of skid marks?
    Mr. Clean-ass: Before I can get rid of them, the dog is already drinking out of the bowl. What the hell, he eats his own poop, so I let him clean the bowl.
    Ellen: Wow, that is clever. What do you do with the cardboard roller things, since you have so many of them.
    Mr. Clean-ass: I donate them to charity. What they do with them, I haven’t a clue.
    Ellen: Ladies and gentlemen….lets hear it for Mr. Clean-ass, who has the cleanest ass this side of Uranus.

    2
  5. Most of his hoarded TP supply will be past its “use by” date before he has a chance to clean his ass with them.

    Nobody should wipe with stale TP. Always use fresh TP that is not past its “use by” date. Stale TP has germs and bacteria, and you don’t want those on or in your butt.

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