Chicago Alderman, Howard Brookins, Jr. claims it was an aggressive urban squirrel that got caught up in the spokes of his bike wheel and sent him sprawling on the pavement. Brookins, a noted hater of the trash raiding rodents, was hospitalized with a fractured skull.
14 Comments on Squirrel Takes Out Hater Alderman
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I call bullshit on the ‘Squirrel getting wrapped up in the spokes’
Even if the squirrel was caught at the front fork and a spoke, a squirrel does not have the mass to block the wheel from turning.
The old fart has a squirrel phobia and hit the front brake and went over the bars, and is blaming a squirrel for his over-reaction
Here’s a picture of the squirrel wrapped up in the spokes.
Eternal, Confound you and your facts.
I stand corrected.
I call bullshit on my calling bullshit
If squirrels are gnawing through trash can lids then the company giving him the kickback for the contract is doing a pretty bad job.
I don’t use a bike to take out those verminous, destructive little bastards. I use a .22.
Seriously, I left my car’s windows down for a day or two after work. Air conditioning having failed during the summer… The little bastard, after having eaten a hole through our garbage tote, then decided that he would live in the front passenger seat!
My husband ended that rather quickly…
@Poor Lazlo – I think you are correct about insufficient mass.
@eternal cracker p – You are obviously correct that the squirrel ended up wrapped in the spokes.
But it isn’t at all clear that said squirrel provided enough resistance to lock up either the rotation or steering. In fact, I don’t think it did. I am a bicycle rider (not one of the militant assholes, though) and have never had a bad spill but have come close a few times. I know what kind of force is needed to bring down bike and rider if the rider is trying to stay upright and moving.
So the nasty, dirty little rodent caused the accident himself and is blaming it on the squirrel.
Urban squirrels matter.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
izlamo delenda est …
Know what I think? I think he was riding his bicycle without the seat again, just the seat post, when he hit a pot hole. Squirrel was laughing so hard he got all caught up in the spokes. Anyway, that’s what happens in Portland.
Yikes, I’ve killed a few squirrels in my time. I didn’t know they were in for revenge!
Did the squirrel yell “allu akbar”?
Wow! First Jimmy Carter is attacked by a killer rabbit, now this!
Karma: 1